My sister is going to be the death of me! (Rant/need advice)

sara~b · #1 December 13th, 2009, 06:34 AM

I know most of you have read all the posts about her and how rude she was when I told her we're expecting. A few of you read about what I posted in private about her. Well today she iced the cake! Apparently yesterday she took my nephew (he's only 18 months old) and went off with some guy she met online. They left around 1PM and never came home last night. I got a paniced (sp?) call at 3AM from my stepmom asking if I'd heard from her or if I had any info. I searched her MySpace page and Facebook for clues and at 7AM was still searching for info. I had called her phone several times but her mailbox was full and she didn't return my calls or answer my texts. I managed to hack her account and get this guys phone number. Her mom did a reverse look up on the number and it said the phone was from New Jersey (the guy said he was from West Virginia) so we were really starting to freak out now. I tried calling the guys phone and didn't get an answer. I left a message pretending to be another internet girl who was waiting for him to call back.

In the meantime Shane took Gemma to go grocery shopping. In the middle of all my searching and digging for my sister and nephew, he calls and tells me he got into a wreck. They were on a bridge and a firetruck was coming so he tried to pull as far to the side as he could. The firetruck slid on the ice and pinned our SUV against the concrete barriers on the side of the bridge. Luckily, he and Gemma were fine but they were pinned for almost 2 hours. Now they are trying to get home and it's too icy. They are sitting in a parking lot waiting for all the traffic and accidents to clear before they try to make it the last 2-3 miles home. Shane sent me this pic from when they were pinned:

Well I can't go anywhere obviously so I can't go get Shane and Gemma and I can't go looking for my sister. I am freaking out! When my phone rings and it's my sister!

She said Damien fell asleep in his playpen and then she and this guy fell asleep in his bed! I see about a hundred things wrong with this but #1) This isn't the BF I wrote about in Private Forum #2) She had never met this guy before and she takes my nephew to do it #3) She was drinking so who was caring for my nephew? #4) Nobody knew where she was or who she was with and she doesn't see a problem with that.

There's just so much wrong with this picture. She said the playpen was next to the bed so what if Damien woke up and saw her having sex with some random guy? I freaked out and told her "You better not get pregnant again!" and her only reply was "Why not? You are." It's like she's living in some fantasy world and doesn't understand that she could catch a disease, get raped, be murdered or put Damien in danger. I just talked to my stepmom again and she is filing for custody of Damien. I just really hope she gets it for my nephew's sake. This is rediculous! I can't take anymore of this!

If you made it this far, thanks for reading. Any advice or perspectives is greatly appreciated.

HopeWishWait · #2 December 13th, 2009, 06:45 AM

Oh my god, Sara. I can't even fathom how you must be feeling right now. First, I'm glad your sister and nephew are ok but how completely irresponsible of her, you have every right to be livid with her. Thank God Shane and Gemma are ok, that must have been terrifying for them!! Give Gem hugs from me and try to stay calm!

Angelaosaurus-rex · #3 December 13th, 2009, 07:03 AM

I'm glad they are all alright (sis, baby, Gemma, Shane)! Has your sister always made these bad decisions or just since you have been pregnant? I really have no good advice other then some one needs to slap some sense into her! I'm sorry you are having to deal with all this.

Mars · #4 December 13th, 2009, 07:48 AM

Firstly, I'm so glad that Gemma and Shane are OK.

As for your sister, I don't know what to say but it seems like your stepmom will be the better custodian of Damien.

JediRach · #5 December 13th, 2009, 10:20 AM

I posted in the DDC but hot dang this is not okay. I hope your stepmom gets custody of the baby.

#6 December 13th, 2009, 10:27 AM

I honestly have no advice b/c I have never known anyone like your sister irl. It sounds like a Maury Povich episode! I think the custody thing is a good idea. Other then that, I don't know. GL!

Oriyan · #7 December 13th, 2009, 10:45 AM

Coming from a knowledge of Psychology, there is something not right upstairs with her way of thinking -- either too immature or something else. Your stepmom is doing the right thing.

I am glad Shane and Gemma are ok!

~*Bethy*~ · #8 December 13th, 2009, 10:53 AM

Im very glad their OK!! How old is your sister...I dont think I caught this. But I do agree that your step mom should file for custody. Good move! Sorry your DF and DD got in a wreck! At least it was the firetrucks fault LOL woohoo here comes a new carseat

Hang in there sweets

Chelnae6 · #9 December 13th, 2009, 11:36 AM

I think her sister is around 19 or 20. How irresponsible of her to risk her and her sons life and not see a problem with it. Why is there a playpen at this guys house.

I too hope your stepmom gets custody of him. Get a print out of these myspace messages.

Im glad that Shane and Gemma are alright. Hopefully they are home now and safe.

*krista* · #10 December 13th, 2009, 11:54 AM

Woah. That is really wreckless! I second Angela's question, did her behavior take a turn for the worst after you got pregnant, or was she always like this? Is it some cry for attention? Is she TRYING to get pregnant? We need Kyle!

What a night. I'm glad Shane and Gemma are okay.

A*LOT*OF*HOPE · #11 December 13th, 2009, 12:14 PM

Wow, Im am so glad that everyone is ok!! You sister needs to give her head a shake, that is so NOT ok!!! Putting yourslef in danger is one thing, but an innocent child?? WOW. I hope you step mom gets custody, your sister has a lot of growing up to do!!

LisanAndy · #12 December 13th, 2009, 12:24 PM

Whoa, are you kidding me? That's insane! Your sister really needs help! I'm glad your nephew was ok! As for Gemma and your B/F, how scary, I'm sorry that happened

sara~b · #13 December 13th, 2009, 03:04 PM

We've come up with a plan and I might get in some trouble doing it but I will do it to save my nephew. My sister now says she really likes it at this guys house and she's not coming home. I called her and was like, "If you don't come home then how will I give you and D your Christmas gifts?" She said she will sneak home, get more clothes for her and my nephew and get our presents and then call me and tell me an address to meet her. I told my stepmom all of this and she is going to go in front of a judge for an emergency custody order tomorrow. This is where it gets sticky...

If the judge grants the emergency order then when my sister tells us where to meet I will just have the local authorities go with me and get Damien.

If not, well, I have another plan.

Hopefully none of it will be necessary and the judge will grant the court order tomorrow. We're going to try and get my sister declared mentally unstable. My stepmom found letters she had received from a guy in prison on drug charges! Plus the pictures she posted and now the fact that she picked up my nephew and left to go to some guys house she never met before and now says she isn't coming home! It had better be enough because I'm to the point that I will take desperate measures to get my nephew back in safe (and sane) hands.

Please pray that we get a good and kind judge tomorrow ladies! I really need my nephew back!

*krista* · #14 December 13th, 2009, 05:16 PM

She wants to stay there??!

*vi · #15 December 13th, 2009, 08:15 PM

I really hope your stepmom gets custody because it really sounds like your sister needs to do some growing up and she doesn't need to be putting her baby in all these kinds of situations. as for advice... I"m sorry but I have none... never been in a situation even close to that...

LaLaRose3 · #16 December 13th, 2009, 08:29 PM

it really sounds like your sister has a problem... and I feel very sorry for that poor baby.

I am really hoping and praying for a GOOD, COMMON SENSE judge tomorrow! *Please* update us here, because I am worried for that little boy!

Best of luck. You are doing the right thing! *HUGS*

fromGirltoMommy · #17 December 14th, 2009, 04:17 AM

Oh my!! I cant believe how sister would do that with her son?! And I really hope the judge really has some common sense!! Make sure to update us, I hope it all goes smoothly! Ill be praying!

And Im SOOOOOOOOOO glad Shane and Gemma are ok, how scary!!

LisanAndy · #18 December 14th, 2009, 04:28 AM

Make sure you update us! I can't believe she wants to stay there!

KatiInCT · #19 December 14th, 2009, 04:35 AM

Completely unacceptable on your sister's part. It just continues to amaze me how some people's minds work and what they think is 'okay'. You and your stepmom are doing the right thing. I so hope that it all works out and that your nephew can continue to have the correct role models in his life (i.e. you and your stepmom and not random internet guy!).

I am still just in shock over your story. Please KUP, I will be sending all sorts of positive thoughts your way today while you wait to hear from the judge!