[♥Ashley♥]

WOW WOW WOW. And its not a good wow....

Let me try and get through this. And I hope I remember everything, but im sure I dont, and I cant even remember some of the terms already.

Okay, so I go into this Dr appointment thinking it'll be like my others... Boy was I wrong. Turns out there is a reason they suggested IUI, and for some reason I was never told these results. Jasons SA was low on all three counts (Morphology, motility, and count) the one that is the most troubling is the motility. The count wasnt bad at all (35 million and the cut off for normal is 40 million) thats the only "number" i can remember, i cant remember what the other two were but they were a good amount under normal. Then he does my ultrasound, I have a GREAT looking egg, and FANTASTIC lining. Great! Then he does the test where he takes some of my cm and puts it under the microscope. This is where the problem happens...the sperm are literally dormant. Not moving up, down, side to side, circles, NOTHING. So knowing the SA results that is a factor, and now he thinks I have hostile cm along with that. His sperm are not very healthy to begin with and IM damaging them even more He showed me the slide under the microscope and literally I did not see ONE sperm moving. I cant believe this. So we go back into the room and he tells me, the MTHFR can definitely be a factor. But if any sperm that look like this ever got to my egg somehow (and obviously they do because I get pregnant quite often) this will definitely result in a miscarriage in his opinion because they are just hanging on by a thread. Then I am wisked into the room where they talk to you and our next step is IUI, there is another blood test we both have to do (sperm resistance or antibodies or something like that) to rule that out. And then our final diagnosis will be the MTHFR and male factor Is this really me? Is this really my life? I feel SO bad for Jason, im so sad that its partly him...I wish it was all me. She then told me im about to ovulate so the IUI will be tomorrow. She said our chances with an IUI are really good because it'll be bypassing my horrible cm. I just cant believe we are a couple who needs IUI. We have to get pregnant in a Dr's office She told me i need an Ovidrel (sp?) shot today and to run downstairs to the pharmacy to get it and she'll give it to me...so I walk out of the Dr's office and the tears just automatically started. I couldnt stop. I called Jason bawling, of course he made me feel better. Saying its okay, were gonna do it. I was just so upset that we cant be "normal" and get pregnant at home in our own bed, I have to make an appointment with the Dr to get pregnant, and pay to get pregnant. He kept telling me that doesnt matter at all. I know he's right but its hard right now. So the nurse gives me my shot, and said do not take a HPT for 2 full weeks because obviously it'll show up positive, but I know alot of times it's out of peoples systems alot sooner. I'll probably test until the triggers out of my system. Then Dr comes back in and he says unfortunately if the IUI's dont work then its IVF for us I cannot believe this, absolutely cannot believe it. Im going to be positive and upbeat and say the IUI will work. And if our sperm resistance tests (?) come back positive for either of us, its definitely IVF no more IUI's.

So the IUI is tomorrow morning at 9:15 am. Please wish us luck, im devastated at all the news, but im happy that they said our chances with IUI are very good.

Oh Ashley, I am so sorry. that is such hard news to hear. Your chances at IUI success do sound really great. I hope it goes well tomorrow, definitely KUP

[midnight_starr]

(((HUGS))) So sorry you are having to deal with all of this!!!!! I wish you the best of luck with the IUI!!!! I've never dealt with this so hopefully one of the other ladies who have been through this can offer some more support!!!!

[LisanAndy]

Oh Ashley I really don't have any words that will make you feel better. Just know I'm praying for you. HUGE hugs!

[Frozendesire]

That has got to be so hard to hear. I'm so sorry. I really hope tomorrow goes well though. I'll be thinking about you constantly. Let us know how it all goes.

[**Jenn**]

Huge hugs Ashley! I'm so sorry with everything you guys have to go through. Keeping you in my prayers and thoughts very positive that IUI will do the trick tomorrow!

[alicenwonderland]

*Hugs* *Hugs* *Hugs* I'm so sorry. Hopefully IUI is all you need!

Feel free to stop by the TTC with MA board. Those girls are very knowledgable, helpful, and supportive. They let me stick around even though i concieved naturally.

[♥Ashley♥]

Originally Posted by alicenwonderland

*Hugs* *Hugs* *Hugs* I'm so sorry. Hopefully IUI is all you need!

Feel free to stop by the TTC with MA board. Those girls are very knowledgable, helpful, and supportive. They let me stick around even though i concieved naturally.

Thanks Alice, I just posted over there. Im not a needy person and I dont like to share alot of personal stuff too often, but I am in need of some support more than ever

Thank you to all you girls

[CandaceDianne]

{{{{HUGS}}}}} I would be upset too!! The good news is the doctor is going to mess around and keep your hopes up about the medicine working and he is going straight for what he thinks will work. When will get you get the sperm resistant tests back?
I am praying all you need is the IUI!!! {{{HUGS}}}

[~*sierra*~]

*hugs* i'm so sorry about all this crazy stuff.....jason is right though, it doesnt matter. all's well that ends well and this will end with a baby for you so that's the important part. on the bright side you didnt have to wait long to get your IUI....KUP and i'll be thinking of u!

[Chelnae6]

I know that it was not the news that you wanted to hear Ash b/c of the situation... why cant you two just be like other couples out there and have sex, get pregnant and pop out lots of healthy babies... But this is a positive b/c you can get pregnant and have healthy babies. IUI is less expensive that IVF.

I pray that thats all that you need to get u knocked up and pregnant for 9 months. Even if its just 8 months, as long as the result is a healthy baby. And you can still have like 5 or 10 kids

Glad that you finally got real answers to your question tho concerning why you needed an IUI. Tell Jason that we said thank you for making you feel better. Its great to have a supportive hubby by your side who understands you and will do whatever it takes to work with you and to make you feel better about situations that you never thought you'd be in.

[Trannyfromtheuk]

At least you know now that your RE wasnt doing this to make money out of you and he can go back to being a super guy.
I honestly hope the IUI works and you get prego! Your going to make a fantastic mommy.
We're here if you just need to talk, vent, cry anything, Just know us girlies are here for you, every step of the way!

[szczepanski]

I think it is great that you have a game plan now!!! That coupled with the fact that Jason is amazingly supportive and that is just even better. I know it has to be hard to hear that kind of news when you aren't expecting it.

You will be getting pregnant....it doesn't matter how....and you will get your little one...that is what the ultimate goal is. You guys are going to make amazing parents!

[♥Ashley♥]

Thank you so much girls. I have to say my DH has a good way of making me feel so much better. I say "Im so sad that we cant get pregnant like everyone else" and he'll say "It doesnt make one bit of difference" and i'll say "What if it doesnt work" and he said "we'll do it again"... I also said im sad about this all and he thinks "I should be happy we know what to do and were doing it" This is all I want to hear. My DH is amazing

[CandaceDianne]

Your DH does sound amazing...count your blessings because not everyone is as blessed as you to have a great husband!

[Kiwi]

I know exactly how you are feeling honey. The thought of having to get a doctor to help you get pregnant is so unfair. The fact that falling pregnant isn't going to be this private, intimate thing between you and your DH is so unfair. The fact that you and your DH both have fertility issues is so unfair.

But you know what... You'll do whatever you need to do to get a healthy wee bub. Because you and your DH want and deserve that more than anything. Your DH is right in saying you guys will just keep trying if it doesn't work - because that IS what you'll do. And we'll all be right here, supporting you every step of the way.

I've got everything crossed for you, honey. I hope it's only one round of IUI that you'll need to go through.

You guys are going to make wonderful parents!

PS The girls on TTC with MA are great. I've been hanging out there a bit lately with lots of questions regarding IVF.

[Resi]

That must have been a lot to take in by yourself. I'm sure everything will go well tomorrow and of course I wish you the best of luck. Hugs! It is going to happen one way or another. The good thing is you have a plan of action.

[..Penelope..]

I'm sorry for the difficult new, Ashley.

Wishing you all the best for the IUI tomorrow! I'm so glad that you have a game plan now, and I hope your sticky bean comes really soon!

[ShannonMVT]

I'm so sorry you got such shocking news.

I will say that from what I've read that CM test can be a little controversial. Not all drs think it is a good indicator of if there is a problem I think b/c the timing and conditions have to be exactly right or else the test isn't useful. I'm not saying it ISN'T accurate in your case b/c I don't know, just letting you know what I've read about it and also I think I asked my RE about it and she said they didn't do it.

It really does sound like you can be successful with IUI. I know it's hard to hear you (or your Dh) has another "problem" and now you don't get to make a baby the good old fashioned way. But once your baby is in your arms it won't matter! Or actually it will make you even more thankful.

This is another bump in the road for you sweetie, but that is ALL it is. So have yourself a good cry and then you and your hubby will go to the RE, get you sperminated and get you that sticky baby!!!

[alicenwonderland]

I'm glad you have such a supportive DH. It warms my heart reading his words.