Comments

**Jenn** · #1 April 29th, 2010, 07:01 AM

I know I shouldn't let it but it's really starting to get under my skin. Anytime we go anywhere with all the kids we get stopped a lot by anyone and everyone wanting to see Lila. Then I brace myself for THE comment--"Oh, you finally got your girl!" I don't know these people and I really hurt for my boys that this is always said right in front of them. Like they were practice until I got what I *really* wanted. Of course that's not true and I would have been pleased as punch with a third boy but everyone just assumes I just desperately wanted a girl after 2 boys. What do I say to these people? I don't want the boys to start feeling bad but I don't want to get into it with complete strangers either.

JediRach · #2 April 29th, 2010, 07:13 AM

Who says stuff like that. I get comments when people find out we are having a girl like "Oh, well its your first. You can always try again" like we don't want our daughter or something. Just think about the kind of close minded bubble those people live in and realize it makes you the bigger person to loves your kids because of who they are, not the gender.

Oriyan · #3 April 29th, 2010, 07:21 AM

I got those stupid comments a lot too. "Oh a boy! guess your done having kids now ehh?"

I mean really, who says this nonsense?!

greeneyes · #4 April 29th, 2010, 07:28 AM

I get similar comments with having two girls and it both breaks my heart and pisses me off. People would ask me all the time if we were going to try for a boy and now they just assume that's why I'm pregnant again. It sucks.

.Brandi. · #5 April 29th, 2010, 07:32 AM

Maybe I'm a little forward but I would say this "Yes, we have a girl, but I would appreciate it if you didn't make it seem like my boys are less important. Thanks." And walk away!

CandaceDianne · #6 April 29th, 2010, 07:36 AM

Have your boys said anything to you about the comments? Im really sorry people are being so inconsiderate!

That would really piss me off too and I would have to say something to them about it.

Frozendesire · #7 April 29th, 2010, 09:00 AM

Yuck! I think I would just be straight forward. I would say "excuse me? actually I would have been just as happy with three boys" and then walk away.

people are so rude

Mod-LadyCoconut · #8 April 29th, 2010, 11:55 AM

Aw, I'm sorry! That would piss me off and break my heart for my boys as well! What is the matter with people? It's so bizarre to me that people just SAY things OUT LOUD. you know? Ugh. The worst part is you can't go off on them b/c its a bad example to the boys, so you have to come up with a response that both puts them in their place and makes the boys feel loved/wanted and goes over their head. haha. tough!

♥Ashley♥ · #9 April 29th, 2010, 12:08 PM

People are so **** rude! That would really piss me off too, and I would probably say something. Just something simple like "Oh, no I would have been perfectly happy with another boy too" I cant believe people have the nerve to say some of the things they do! I totally agree it puts Lila up on a pedestal and the boys will probably start getting jealous!

You wanted all of your babies!

~*Bethy*~ · #10 April 29th, 2010, 12:11 PM

I agree you have to show calmness for the boys but put em in their place too. I would just say "nope I would have been 100% happy with another boy" and smile so sweet like and walk away lol

amazing_love · #11 April 29th, 2010, 12:11 PM

That would upset me as well! It amazes me what people feel they have the right to say!

**Jenn** · #12 April 29th, 2010, 03:07 PM

Ashley and Beth--that's usually the response I give, "Actually, I would have been thrilled with another boy" (with all smiles). Of course then most of them go, "Oh god really? Not me!" That's usually when I just walk away because they keep going.

Thankfully I don't think the boys have been paying any attention because usually they're preoccupied with looking at other things but you never know what they hear, especially when you think they aren't listening. As of right now they absolutely adore their baby sister and think the sun rises and sets with her. I don't want stupid strangers comments make them start to resent her.

Chelnae6 · #13 April 29th, 2010, 03:18 PM

You know when I found out I was having a girl ppl would always say "Ohhh I know you're sooo happy to be having a girl!!!" They got extra excited that she was a girl. THen they'll say "Ohhh I bet your glad you're having a girl". I'm like "Actually I was hoping for a boy but I'm happy either way!". Like really?

I feel your pain.

*krista* · #14 April 29th, 2010, 05:27 PM

I hate the comments I get too, but I could imagine how infuriating it would be to have people make comments like that in front of your boys. I would just do what Shannon said, say something that is uplifting for your boys, then just walk away before they have a chance to spew anything else.

I had a guy at work call my child a curse!

I didn't take it well. Basically he was saying that everyone who works under my manager have been cursed with girls.

Mars · #15 April 30th, 2010, 04:59 AM

Some people just don't know what to say and instead of keeping their mouths shut, they just open them and let nonsense come out.

I hate comments like that.

LisanAndy · #16 April 30th, 2010, 06:04 AM

I hate the comments too

Before I was pregnant with this baby I had a lady tell me not to get pregnant again because I'd just have a 3rd girl and hate my life... ummm, ok? Right now I'm getting "you just NEED to have a boy"

No, I'll take what God blesses me with and enjoy that thank you very much!

.Brandi. · #17 April 30th, 2010, 06:47 AM

When I was pregnant with Preston I got asked this a lot:

Stranger: "Do you know what you're having?"

Me: "Yes, it's a boy. My second."

Stranger: "Oh, better luck next time!"

*kyle* · #18 April 30th, 2010, 08:50 AM

I think you will get ignorant comments no matter what. If you're pregnant with a girl people make a comment about it not being a boy, but I also got it the other way around while pregnant. I had "I bet you're glad it's a boy" and also "I bet you're disappointed it's not a girl." Either way, it's just someone's lame attempt at making conversation. It really just means that the person has no social skills and doesn't know how to be appropriate. We all know how pregnancy invites anyone and everyone's opinions, right?

I think I would say "All three of my children are wonderful individuals and very much wanted in our family." That level of graciousness should shut them up.

greeneyes · #19 April 30th, 2010, 08:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *krista*

I hate the comments I get too, but I could imagine how infuriating it would be to have people make comments like that in front of your boys. I would just do what Shannon said, say something that is uplifting for your boys, then just walk away before they have a chance to spew anything else.

I had a guy at work call my child a curse! I didn't take it well. Basically he was saying that everyone who works under my manager have been cursed with girls.

**jessie** · #20 May 1st, 2010, 09:30 AM

That upsets me SO much! I was beyond thrilled to be having a boy and nearly everyone was like, maybe you will get a girl next time or maybe you will be lucky with your second. Even my mom said 'oh, I wish it was a girl'. I would almost break down in tears. It was like having a boy isn't something to celebrate. Personally I think if someone has such a strong gender preference then they shouldn't have children because it is always a 50/50 chance either way. I would be delighted to have a girl equally as much as I would to have a second little man.