[*krista*]

Reading posts in my DDC about other babies has me worried about Charlotte's social development. She smiles, but not often. No giggles. No cooing. Other mommies are talking about how their babies are grinning all day and "talking" to them. Should I be worried? I talked to the doctor about it and she didn't seem concerned, but I still am.

[Oriyan]

Aw hun she is only 9 weeks old! J.J did not really start smiling a lot until he was 3 months old, and he did not "talk" to us till 4 months. Social smiles just START at 8 weeks old. :-) Here are the milestones for a 3 month old

Language/social

Begins to babble, coo, squeal, and gurgle; smiles responsively; shows emotions; enjoys playing with other people and may cry when playing stops. Begins to imitate some sounds, draws out vowel sounds, such as aaah and oooh; makes louder sounds; begins to laugh.

[*krista*]

There must be social butterflies in my ddc then because Charlotte is one of the older babies there and other babies seem to be smiling like crazy. Maybe some of the mommies are exaggerating a bit. That does make me feel better though.

[soImarriedAnerd]

I had the early smiler, but then he was a late coo-er/babbler LOL

[SandKmommy]

Originally Posted by *krista*

Maybe some of the mommies are exaggerating a bit.

Bingo
I've been on JM for almost 5yrs now and have noticed this is how it is. Every mom wants their child to better then the next its natural. But I know how it can hurt to read "all" the babies/children the same age doing things and your's doesn't....I've btdt with Seamus

[~*sierra*~]

payne took forever to do anything! well over 3 months for a real smile i'm sure of it. i'm sure she will start up before you know it! i seroiusly melt every time i see ur siggie krista, she is so gorgeous!

[Mjp121212]

I caught brayden's first REAL smile on camera at about 10wks old. And cooing at 9wks? Really? I don't think I have ever heard a baby coo at 9wks. Seems a bit soon to me.

[Mars]

Babies develop at different stages so try not to let it get you down. I know that's difficult but she will do it in her own time. There were some things that Amara was ahead in and others that she was way behind in, like crawling. She would get up on her hands and knees but she took really long before she started moving off. Almost everyone else's children were crawling around. I just let her do things at her pace.

[ShannonMVT]

I remember saying something like that to my mom about something Matthew wasn't doing that "every other baby was" and she told me not to worry about what people said on bragmommies.com What's funny is that she doesn't even know the forum is called justmommies.
Seriously sometimes things are a bit exagerrated from time to time.... I mean, I'm sure some babies really are saying their ABCs at 6 months, but the vast majority are not. I bet Charlotte is just fine. Try to enjoy her and appreciate the things she is doing without worrying about what other's babies are doing. I know that is easier said then done and I need to take my own advice on that too!

[~*Bethy*~]

ABC's at 6 months? Ian didnt start "cooing" or "talking" till he was about 8 months! Exaggeration seems to be big in our group now that the babies are here, Krista. Im not even on the may DDC now that I stepped down. Bella is a week behind charlotte and I can tell ya that She is NOT cooing at smiling at me all day. In fact when shes not sleeping, shes fussy and whiney!

[Mod-LadyCoconut]

Babies seem to work on one new 'trick' or area and slack in the others. So if she's holding her head up well (I think you mentioned that in another post) that that probably explains why her 'social skills' aren't as developed... she's busy focusing on her motor skills right now. Right now a lot of babies in my PR are doing the 'mama' and 'dada' noises and Lily isn't doing anything even close. But she is crawling and pulling up, and a lot of other babies aren't. I think babies just tend to work on different skills at different times and they focus on specific things. But you're definitely not "behind." She may not be one of the first in the groups to do things... but its not even common to be doing it yet, so don't sweat it.

Post a poll in your group and I bet you there are only a handful of the cooing smiling babies. It just feels like a lot b/c the moms are excited and bragging... so you're going to hear more from them than posts being like "hey, here's all the things my kid can't do yet!" kwim?

[Mjp121212]

ABC's at 6m? Ummmmm....mmmkay. I'd like to see the video of that one lol. If at 12m she not on level then I'd be concerned. right now though....I'd pay attention to gross motor, if she makes eye contact during feedings, start saying her name and see if she seems to notice it.....things like that.

[Babybear4]

I remember being there in my PR, too. All babies are different, so you can't compare your child to others. I, too, had the baby who didn't smile or coo, couldn't hold her head up very well, crawled later than most and walked a long while after a lot of the other babies started walking, but she got teeth at 4 months and is/was advanced in many other ways. I think that is the biggest downside to when a DDC becomes a PR, because mommies want to brag about what their children do but then others feel like their children are behind because they don't do the same things, and then it alljust goes downhill from there. If your pedi isn't concerned, you shouldn't be either. I am sure Charlotte is a bright little girl, she just isn't showing it in the same ways that other babies are.

ETA: Also, keep in mind that what you may consider a real smile or coo, may not be what somebody else does. Some moms may think that because their child smiles in their sleep and makes noises when they are squirming around that they are "smiling and cooing all day." It's easier to say that than to say "Oh, my baby only has gassy smiles in their sleep and grunt and squeak when they are squirmy." Every mom wants their baby to be the best, smartest, most advanced baby, and so some might really exaggerate what their child is doing. I am the type of person who doesn't like to brag, so I didn't even announce when Lorena started really walking because I didn't want to make others feel badly, while some moms announced that their children were fulltime walkers because they took 2 steps from the couch to the table.

[**Jenn**]

Ditto Shannon. I was an early intervention teacher for kids aged birth to 3 years before I had the kids. Babies/children will focus on one skill at a time. If its language/social skill then motor skills will take a back seat and vice versa. But in the end they all catch up. Lila is extremely social and even though she seems eager to run with her big brothers the desire to try and move around is not totally there--she'd rather lay there and suck on her toes. lol Parents in general (not just on JM) will exaggerate their kids skills--especially if you don't know them or their kid IRL and they don't really have to "prove" it. You're going to find that everywhere and even if your kid does something early someone will always have a kid that did it earlier! Those are the "one up you" parents that always have to be just a bit better and their kids have to be just a bit better than yours. Just be confident in the fact that you're raising a happy, content baby and she'll do things in her own time.

[Chelnae6]

I think lani started talking at about 8-10 weeks. I would always talk to her and then wait for her to make the slightes noise and we went back and forth. And I also kept smiling at her until she smirked or smiled back. She giggles occasionally, not often and didnt start smiling on purpose until like 10 weeks.

But that doesnt mean that theres anything wrong with charlotte. She's only 9 weeks. Being in a sex can be hard bc u want ur baby to do what everyone elses is doing, but that may not always be the case. And doesn't mean that your baby is slow or anything like that.

[*krista*]

Thanks everyone, that really made me feel better. I didn't know babies worked on one thing at a time like that. She's definitely working on her motor skills. Maybe I'm just a bit anxious to start interacting with her too.

Originally Posted by Chelnae6

But that doesnt mean that theres anything wrong with charlotte. She's only 9 weeks. Being in a sex can be hard bc u want ur baby to do what everyone elses is doing, but that may not always be the case. And doesn't mean that your baby is slow or anything like that.

Got something on your mind?? Did you mean DDC?

[niknok]

NIne weeks is so early for doing that type of stuff regularly. Ditch the playroom, it's nothing but exaggerations and what I consider flat out lies. I get SO annoyed at that crap. My SIL does that on her blog, so her friends can think that their child is the most brilliant thing ever. I can't stand that constant exaggeration....

Charlotte is perfect! Eli was four months yesterday, and just in the last few weeks has *really* become social. It will all come in time!

[Oriyan]

Ditto what the others said about focusing on one skill at a time.

J.J started getting ear infections all the time and his hearing was compromised -- his fine motor and gross motor skills just picked right up! He is doing things for a 12 month old that he shouldn't be able to according to the milestones chart (feeding himself with a spoon, playing roll the ball, etc) however, he does lack in language now even though in the beginning he was saying words at 6 months old.

Every baby is different. Some babies are going to be early walkers at like 7 months old, some at 12 months, some at 18 months. As long as they are not SIGNIFICANTLY behind with their milestones, your baby is just fine

[~* Helen *~]

to everyone .... babies all develop at there own rate .. Ryan was rolling over at 4 months ... Chloe never mastered that til she was 7 months ... again he was walking full time at 11 months and she was 15 months old when she started walking !!!

[ScottishBrit]

Isn't it fun all the baby stuff that drives us crazy! I will tell you you will always be worried and concerned with how your LO is doing compared to another. I still freak out! Ive just learned to ignore and shake things off. Cambria does things at her own pace so when she's not where other babies are I think about it and put it in the back of my head. Everytime It takes her a couple more times or a month and then she catches on. My Peid said she's fine with it.