[JustBreathe]

There will be no divorce. This separation will end as soon as he cleans up the house-- and his parents are helping him with his hoarding issue. When it comes down to love and respect, we have it all. We have been fighting over situational frustrations and taking things out on one another because it's "convienient". We having our marriage counseling beginning at noon on Monday and it will be weekly there after. We will no longer use the D work and we are NOT separated. My mother's home is not my home. This is temporary.

There are so many people who would kill for the love and laughs we share, we just need to be mindful not to joke so much that at the end of the day we do not forget to nurture each other's soul as well. What is good for him is honestly the first thing on my mind and for me his and any further talk of sepraration and or divorce is a cop out of working through some real issues that we DO need to resolve. I lived through my parent's divorce, their next divorces, my sister's divorces. Those people weren't civil and didn't even consider one another's happiness and or dreams and goals- in fact they stomped on them.

This is not us. We are above all of this if we put each other and ourselves about this. I'm glad that we finally had the talk that put our feeling and some tears forward before we were too proud to just say how we feel as we are both stubborn.

As far as TTC goes, we're not looking for my monitor, but as always, we're never preventing God's miracles, it's just not something we believe married people do. Thank you all for your kind words, texts, calls, and especially yours Kyle. Morgan, as always, my therapy bill wouldy always be substantially higher without your unwaivering support even when you didn't have words to say.

This is such a relief off my shoulders to know we both completely agree that alone in separate beds is not where either of us belong, that I belong under his right shoulder, with the cats at our feet-- and that even at our worst-- it ain't that bad. I was creating drama and looking for perfection because I was frustrated that I can't control my disabilities I think. We have a long way to venture through therapy, but I'd walk through fire for that man.

[~Caroline~]

It's clear that you two love each other. Good luck with the counselling, I wish you both the best.

[midnight_starr]

I'm glad you guys are working through things!! I am sure counseling will help out a ton!! I'm here if you need me!

[**Jenn**]

I think that's wonderful! I'm so happy for you that you're going to work through things. Your love for each other really shows!

[*JenJen*]

good luck hon.

[Mars]

I totally missed out on what was happpening and I'm sorry I couldn't offer support when you needed it.

I am happy in you both reaching this decision and I can tell that you all have so much love and appreciation for each other. The first few years of marriage can sometimes be so challenging and it seems so easy to just separate or divorce and that may not be required. Counselling is a great step to working towards ironing out those issues and differences. See what it uncovers and how you can make it work. I wish you both the best of luck.

[CandaceDianne]

Thats great!!

[~*sierra*~]

i'm glad you two are committed to working thru your issues! you make a wonderful couple

[♥Ashley♥]

Whoo hoo! Im so happy for you guys! I knew you wouldnt divorce, you guys love eachother way too much to be without eachother! And im so glad Mike agreed to marriage counseling!

[ANGWife]

Where do I send MY bill?

[Frozendesire]

sounds like things are on the right path! Keep us updated on how everything goes It seems like there is alot of love in your relationship, just need to find the right direction!

[*krista*]

Awww I'm so happy to read that. I'm really glad you guys are working through things. Learning to live with someone and learning when to compromise and when to just love them for their quirks can be rough. You guys will work through this and be stronger for it.

[Mod-LadyCoconut]

Originally Posted by *krista*

Learning to live with someone and learning when to compromise and when to just love them for their quirks can be rough. You guys will work through this and be stronger for it.

So true! I'm glad you're sticking it out and fighting for your marriage. Good luck.

[JediRach]

I'm so happy you guys decided to work things out. Sounds like you have a good plan and a good attitude about everything.

[~* Helen *~]

I'm so glad you two are working throught things !!! You both are made for each other xx

[freesiangel]

That's great news!!

[soImarriedAnerd]

Good luck! Sounds like you have a great plan

[~*Bethy*~]

Im so happy to read this! This post has helped me in my time of need as well. Thank you

[*kyle*]

You're welcome. The last PM in your inbox was written before I came to the board and saw this, but it echoes what you said here.

You and Mike will come through this stronger. You are both truly committed to making it work and being the best spouses for one another that you can both be.

If you or anyone else is interested in great, research-based books about how to make marriage work, John Gottman is the guy to read. He has done over 20 years of research into why some marriages work out and some fail. Many of his books include activities throughout that are designed to be worked through with your partner (and with the assistance of a counselor if that's what you choose).