[midnight_starr]

BFing is just not going well for us.. She won't have anything to do with my breasts.. All she does is scream and cry at the breast.. Latches for a second realizes she hates it and screams... Something I looked forward to this whole time just doesn't seem to be working out.. I am pumping but only getting about an ounce every session which I do feed it to her and she drinks it with no problem, but I still have to supplement to make sure she is getting enough.... I don't know if my supply will stay up because I've been so overly tired at night that I skip pumping... I just don't want to be a bad mom... Sorry for the rant, these after baby hormones are just crazy!

[sara~b]

You're not even a week PP! It gets better. Have you talked to an LC? Once I got our latch issues fixed we were able to reduce our supplementing to 1-2 oz per day. I was only pumping an ounce at a time and Ash was losing a ton of weight. My supply didn't fully come in until the last few days and now I can feel how much heavier Ash is getting. The only reason I'm supplementing at all now is to get some sleep. She would nurse all night if I let her! Definitely talk to someone who can help you and post on the BF'ing board as well! The support and tips saved me for sure!

[LisanAndy]

It WILL get better! That first week it felt like Rylie hardly nursed. My rules for myself were: wake to nurse during the day every 3 hours, if she woke up before the 3 hours I'd nurse, if she started to cry I'd nurse. At night I wouldn't wake her to feed, she'd wake when she was hungry (we co-sleep the first 5-6 months) so I'd latch her and back to sleep we'd go. I'd talk to a lactation consultant about it. Hang in there girl

[~*sierra*~]

im glad btdt moms have some reassuring words and advice for you. i'm sure addie is utterly in love with you but i'm sure since you are both learning how to BF it's frustrating for both of u. *hugs*

[CandaceDianne]

Lilyan got lazy within the first week because we supplemented. Keep pumping, my supply didn't even come in until 6 days pp....so you are doing good getting any milk out right now! Try speaking with a LC, but you could also try a nipple shield. That worked wonders for us. It mimics a bottle nipple and over time we didn' t need it anymore. I should have kept trying without it each week, but I just gave up....then after 5 weeks I tried without it and she took to it like a pro. We have been BFing without a nipple shield for 4-5 weeks now.

[Oriyan]

Your not a bad mommy at all! J.J did the same thing and I realized he was not a boob baby. I pumped for him for a month. You need a STRONG pump (hospital grade or the Medelia (sp) double). You should pump every 2 hours if you wanna pump for her. It took a good week before I was getting 5-6oz a session per boob (although one was only giving me 1-2oz due to trauma). Have you thought about having an LC come in?

[JediRach]

My milk didn't come in until the 5th or 6th day PP. Keep trying. Harper is starting to get the hang of it after 3 weeks. Its still hard but its starting to get better.

[soImarriedAnerd]

You not going to be producing ton of milk yet because your breasts are in line with your baby's stomach which is currently the size of a ping pong ball (about 25ml is ALL). So it really only takes a bit to be full. Also your colustrum is so PACKED of nutrition that she is getting like super shakes! LOL
Hook up with a LC or two even! And work on that latch and you HAVE to be 100% consistent and keep on the correct one... which is VERY hard to do with screaming baby. Also until she is 4 weeks old make sure she nurses AT LEAST every 3hrs, otherwise she can get dehydrated easily then get really sleepy (which some think they have good sleepers so you have watch that... I set an alarm for london for the first month). Also maybe try offering up the breast more frequently, BEFORE she gets hungry--so she doesn't get mad because is SO hungry!
I honestly think its a minority that LIKE BFing that first 6 weeks!!
PLUS you have just had MAJOR surgery--Don't forget that (not like you could! LOL) but your body is trying to heal AND produce milk... most c/s moms have a 1-2 day longer till milk comes in. Make sure you keep hydrated and keep your pain level down!
HUGE HUGS my dear.... I know everyone always says this but its SO TRUE--- IT DOES get better. I made little goals for myself which helped those hard moments.. first one was 6 weeks.
And YOU ARE NOT A BAD MOM! NOT FOR ONE SECOND SO GET THAT THOUGHT RIGHT OUT OF YOUR CUTE HEAD <3

Here is a cool link!- Ameda - Breastfeeding Basics: Your Newborn's Stomach — Day 1-10

Also, if you do want to continue, try REALLY hard not to supplement this first few weeks-- is can CAUSE a lazy suck (its so much easier to get it from a bottle then work at getting it from mom). I PROMISE she isn't going to starve herself.... now she may chew up your nipples but she WILL get milk when hungry! LOL

[IamMom]

You are not a bad mom...I didn't like breast feeding and my babies were good at it..... As long as your sweet girl is fed with love that's all that matters!

[ANGWife]

Been there! Even a month after birth I was still only getting and oz or 2 A DAY.

I don't have a ton of BFing tips. But if you are serious about BFing and trying all you can, that's all you can do. Don't beat yourself up if it simply doesn't work for you and your baby.

[bittersweet]

I know it is tough Aimee Hang in there. You are doing GREAT! Don't feel like a bad mama. I think you have already been given really good advice. I just wanted to second the advice on not supplementing or giving bottles. If you do want to continue BFing, this will make it much harder in the long run. Sure, baby may be ultra fussy and want to nurse 24 hrs a day...but your body WILL catch up and produce more milk and she will get used to the boob. Bottles are easier for them to get milk out of ..making them impatient and frusterated when going back to the boob. Plus I don't think any pump can stimulate milk production as good as your baby.

BFing is no easy task and yes the first couple months are super tough. But it is so worth it in the large run and after a while it is a piece of cake.

[Mod-LadyCoconut]

Its kind of funny, when I read your OP I pulled up this link -
Colostrum | Joy in Birthing

and Angela linked practically the same thing. First off, Addie's little tummy is tiny, so she doesn't need very much at all. Also, remember that BFing is a supply/demand thing... if you keep putting her to the breast she will demand more and your supply will continue to build. You may wind up feeling like a human pacifier, but it won't last long. Like a PP said, it DOES get better... and you hear it all the time... but really - look at how many mamas you know online are BFing and realize that it HAS to get better or none of us would be doing it! And remember that many have made similar posts in the early BFing days about what a struggle it has been, and you are NOT alone.

Pumping isn't going to generate the same amount of milk that she would get at the breast, so if you can, I'd suggest skipping that altogether. What kind of bottles have you been using? I recommend the breastflow ones... they have two nipples so baby has to mimick the suck/compress of BFing and I think it helps to avoid nipple confusion and lazy latches. You can get 'em at target.

The bottom line though is, none of this is what determines if you are a bad mom or not. Seriously, it really doesn't.

[Mars]

Firstly, not being able to breastfeed will NOT make you a bad mom.

Secondly, it's still early and this is new so it's normal for it to not go so smoothly. My milk didn't come in for a few days either so your supply will probably pick up in a few days. Just keep offering and see how it goes. Hang in there. (((HUGS)))

[midnight_starr]

Thanks for all the advice ladies! Y'all are truly amazing and really don't know how much all this advice means to me..

I was seen by the lactation nurse at the hospital twice and she even called my house today to check and see how things were going.. She was great and we worked on the latch issue a ton.. We even tried the nipple shield and that didn't help.. I am still offering the breast at every feeding, but she just doesn't want anything to do with it... At this point I just don't know how serious I am about BFing anymore just because I am so tired and sore... I think things would have been a ton different if I didn't need a c/s.. I am going to keep at it and just see where it goes..

[LuvMyLwAaMr]

A few people have mentioned setting goals for yourself... a LC told me set a goal everyday to just try to make it one more day, and thats what I did... for the first 8 weeks my ds was pretty much attached 24/7!! As doubtful and frustrated as I got, I kept trying and we made it 9 months... Also, I had to supplement when ds was newborn b/c he wasn't gaining, wasn't pooping so he was jaundice and it wouldn't go away... supplemented for a short time while still offering breast all the time, and he had no problem going back to exclusive bf. Every woman and every baby is different... if you feel like it just isn't for you guys, don't stress about it, you will still be a great mommy!

[~Jess~]

As a guess, it sounds to me like she is so used to the instant gratification of the bottle, that when she latches on and milk doesn't automatically pour into her mouth, she gets angry. What you can do is to pump until you letdown and then latch her on. She'll get that instant gratification that she's wanting, plus your nipple will already be elongated for her making it easier to latch on, and her being on the breast rather than pumping will help to increase your supply.

Breastfeeding SUCKS in the early days. It hurts like the dickens, baby doesn't know how to do it right and has to be trained, which can cause issues, especially if they've been offered a bottle, and it's time consuming and straight up exhausting. BUT, I PROMISE it does get better. It will stop hurting, she will figure out her latch, your supply will increase to meet her demand, and in a few weeks, it will all just "click." Keep in mind that breastfeeding is an 18-hour per day job the first several weeks. Don't expect much of yourself. Just lay in bed & nurse and nap in between nursings. Don't worry about the house and your dh or someone else should be bringing food to you and fetching anything else you may need.

Keep trying. And definitely try achieving letdown prior to latching her on. The trick there will be to latch her on quickly so you don't spray her in the face too much, lmao.

[*krista*]

I can't really write out much of a response right now, but I just wanted to share some love. I feel your pain, it is really difficult! Especially if you have a sleepy baby.

[soImarriedAnerd]

Update?

[midnight_starr]

Originally Posted by soImarriedAnerd

Update?

I've given up I just don't have it in me to fight with her when she just wants absolutely nothing to do with it.. I'm sad.. It took me awhile to come to this decision, my DH offered to even go buy me a better pump to pump full time, but I just decided it wasn't for us.. I cried over this decision because I wanted to BF so badly, but I am just miserable and so is she...

Thanks for everything ladies and all the support!!

[soImarriedAnerd]