Sleep

*krista* · #1 February 3rd, 2011, 09:27 AM

Hey ladies! I need help. Charlotte is 8 months old and sleeping much worse than she ever has. She used to be a good sleeper -- woke once to eat and went right back to sleep. Now she is waking 2 or 3 times and a lot of times she will stay up for 2 or 3 hours. This is getting really hard on us since we both still have to wake up to go to work in the morning. Any suggestions? Is she old enough to actually do anything about it or do we need to wait it out a little longer? She hasn't taken much to her purees, so that never helped to make her sleep like I had hoped. We don't co-sleep but her crib is still in our room.

IamMom · #2 February 3rd, 2011, 10:22 AM

You probably already know what my advice will be: I'm a CIO advocate. My kids though were both very receptive to it so I never had to deal with unrealistically long crying spells, vomiting, head banging or any of that. I would not leave my kids to be reacting in that way so I don't encourage it at all costs. If you child is just protest crying (crying cause they WANT you but don't NEED you) than it 100% works.....total extinction method....no going in at all. Although many people do modified or gradual extinction and that can work too, it often takes more nights though. Cold turkey works faster! And if you are up for it, she will sleep better in her own room (if you have a separate room to put her crib). It will be quieter and she will sleep more soundly on her own.....most humans do, young or old.

Those are my suggestions...biologically (according to most doctors etc.) she should be old enough to go all night without feeding and to protest cry for realistic amounts of time (45 minutes max is what I ever had to deal with!) Good luck Krista!

bittersweet · #3 February 3rd, 2011, 11:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IamMom

You probably already know what my advice will be: I'm a CIO advocate. My kids though were both very receptive to it so I never had to deal with unrealistically long crying spells, vomiting, head banging or any of that. I would not leave my kids to be reacting in that way so I don't encourage it at all costs. If you child is just protest crying (crying cause they WANT you but don't NEED you) than it 100% works.....total extinction method....no going in at all. Although many people do modified or gradual extinction and that can work too, it often takes more nights though. Cold turkey works faster! And if you are up for it, she will sleep better in her own room (if you have a separate room to put her crib). It will be quieter and she will sleep more soundly on her own.....most humans do, young or old.

Those are my suggestions...biologically (according to most doctors etc.) she should be old enough to go all night without feeding and to protest cry for realistic amounts of time (45 minutes max is what I ever had to deal with!) Good luck Krista!

Ditto! I highly recommend that book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. It is THE GREATEST! They sell it at Target..and the commercial book stores. I've seen it at the public library too...but I've opened mine many many times. I suggest you buy it. It is more or less the cry it out method, but it talks about combining other methods as well. It has a lot of helpful info on breastfeeding too. Really it does a great job explaining the physiology behind the newborn nervous system and how their sleeping patterns (or lack of) relate to it.

LisanAndy · #4 February 3rd, 2011, 11:31 AM

I also agree. Put her in her own room, in her crib and let her cry it out in short stretches of time (if it makes you feel better. It does me LoL). I go in and comfort by touch and saying it's ok, I'm here. I NEVER pick baby up or make eye contact. All my kids, with this method, sleep through the night and it only took 2 days. Baby is well rested, mommy is well rested, and life is magical LoL. It's hard, I know, to hear baby cry but it's worked wonders. I consider myself very AP in some areas but this is not one of the areas. They aren't hungry, especially if they have a good meal before bed. They wake out of habit. I usually start that method at around 6 or 7 months. 2 nights later we have a baby that sleeps from 8:30 on.

Mars · #5 February 3rd, 2011, 11:58 AM

I never did CIO as I was too "weak" for it. I just couldn't get it done.

I did go through these spells at different stages when Amara was teething. They lasted a few weeks and stopped. I'm not sure if your case is similar but I hope you find a way. I remember the days I went to work as a zombie.

Nami · #6 February 3rd, 2011, 12:30 PM

I'm right there with ya'! Alissa is 11 months and around 8 she started sleeping worse and worse! When she was younger she slept really good but not anymore, she wakes up 2-3 times and half the time she wants to play. My nurse said she's just needing extra "mommy" time and just keep trying to put her back to sleep letting her know it's night time and it should get better sooner or later. We're still waiting

We will be putting her in her own room soon though, after she gives up night time feedings, not sure how that'll go though.

Also, co-sleeping doesn't just mean in the bed with you! It means in the same room so you actually do co-sleep.

petalfuzz · #7 February 3rd, 2011, 02:20 PM

I would try putting her in her own room and see what happens. If she's just awake and not crying, she doesn't need her mommy. She'll get bored and fall back asleep, hopefully. Good luck, though.

~* Helen *~ · #8 February 3rd, 2011, 02:43 PM

I agree .. put her in her own room if you can. Use monitors so you can still hear her overnight.
If shes awake and just chatting she doesn't need you .. she will get bored of staring into darkness and fall asleep

What about one of the cot mobils that come on when it senses babies awake ???

*krista* · #9 February 4th, 2011, 10:06 AM

Thanks for all the advice. I talked it over with DH and he doesn't want to take any of these approaches until she is a year. He said he read "on a website" that they don't self-sooth until 9 months to a year. *sigh* It seems to me it will get harder as she gets older. I'm not sure what I can say to make him think otherwise. We tried it a little last night, but when it got tough, daddy caved.

We will look into moving her crib right now, though. Hopefully that will help. I have to get a chair to put in her nursery to nurse her in first, though. Honestly it will be hard for me to move her! Her nursery is alllllll the way on the other side of the house. It is so... secluded. I feel like such a dork. I was always planning on waiting until she is sleeping through the night to move her so I wouldn't have to drag my lazy butt all the way across the house in the middle of the night. Hah!

midnight_starr · #10 February 4th, 2011, 10:25 AM

I hope something works for you soon. We finally had to let Adeline CIO because she was waking all night long. She now sleeps from 9-5! It worked great for us.

..Penelope.. · #11 February 4th, 2011, 02:46 PM

We do not do CIO, and for the most part, Logan now sleeps 8 hours a night, wakes to nurse, and then sleeps for 2 or 3 more hours. Of course, there are nights when something goes wrong and he needs me more...upset tummy, too cold, too hot, sick, etc...

I hope that things get better for you soon!

soImarriedAnerd · #12 February 4th, 2011, 03:20 PM

London went threw a phase at 9months were he wasn't a good sleeper. I think its because of all the developmental jumps he took that month, not to mention teeth, plus the fact we had started solids the month before. He would sometimes have his eyes closed and just sit up! ...it was a little freaky. I actually asked Dr Sears himself (or the friendly person answering his website! LOL) about this and got a reply that you should expect a sleep regression from about 8-11 months and its very normal.

soImarriedAnerd · #13 February 4th, 2011, 03:26 PM

{{hugs}} those regressions aren't fun, Hope its short lived!

Frozendesire · #14 February 4th, 2011, 05:31 PM

How long has it been going on for? Maybe try to hold out for a bit and if it doesn't improve try doing the suggestions you feel most comfortable with

I know milestones can really interrupt their sleep patterns. AJ was up ALL night lastnight and I really think it's because he's going through so much right now... gaining strength, finding his fingers and hands and what they do etc etc

There is just SO much that can affect sleep.

However after a certain point it's most likely just routine... so when your comfortable maybe doing a type of CIO that your comfortable with and agreeable with hubby would do the trick.

Hopefully things get back to normal quickly!

soImarriedAnerd · #15 February 5th, 2011, 07:25 AM

Was last night any better mama?

*krista* · #16 February 6th, 2011, 12:35 PM

It's been going on since she hit about 7 months. It was like she got sick (vaccines) and just went nuts.

Luckily we haven't had any up all night episodes this weekend. I'm still feeding her at night, I'm just too scared to fully CIO thinking she might be hungry or that something else might be going on (teething, etc). We are looking at a nursing chair to put in the nursery so we can move her crib there. I think it will help because I KNOW DH woke her up last night. She woke up three times, woke me up probably about 5 or 6 times. We probably won't move her for a couple of weeks though (waiting for coupons to be valid for the chair).

We are trying to feed her extra before she goes to bed, but it didn't help at all.

soImarriedAnerd · #17 February 6th, 2011, 01:21 PM

Sometimes (and its hit or miss with kids) feeding more makes it worse (if its GI reason they are waking) because of gas and what-not. For london "topping off" does work but only if its a protein based item. If its fruit or something with natural sugar it makes it worse. It took a bit for me to figure that out, so I just thought I would throw it out there as something to think of.