[Bre*n*Will=Reid]

Hi girls. I know I'm not around much but I do lurk a lot and enjoy reading about everyone. Anyway, I guess I just don't know where to talk about this.

Yesterday my dad called while I was in the shower and left a voicemail. The voicemail told me to call them, but only when I had a lot of time to talk. My blood ran cold, but honestly the first thing that came to my mind was that he and my stepmom were getting a divorce or something like that. He sounded really calm on the voicemail so I didn't think anyone had died or anything like that. I called him back immediately and said that he was just diagnosed with lung cancer that morning. I immediately started crying. My dad seemed so calm and brave and spoke very matter-of-factly. So far they have only done xrays and CT scans but I guess that was enough to know for sure that it is lung cancer, they just don't know how bad it is until after the biopsy (which I believe is tomorrow, when he meets with the oncologist for the first time). His doctor believes that they caught it early and the cancer is in the upper lobe of his left lung, only in the one lung (that they can see so far) and is 2cmx2cm. We are PRAYING that it is the most minor case possible, but even still it's the deadliest form of cancer (based on number of deaths per year). My dad is telling everyone flat out that if it's stage 3 or 4 (or the really bad kind, whatever they call it) that he will not fight it. My dad is only 58 and extremely physically fit and energetic. It makes sense to me that he would say that because I know he doesn't want to feel like a burden and he wouldn't want to spend his last bit of time being slowly killed by medicine/poison. It's hard though, because even if the doctors said that there is a 1% chance of success, I would want him to fight because he's my daddy, you know? However, I would support his decision.

He just keeps talking about what he wants to do and how he wants to live just in case this does take his life. It feels so weird to talk or think about because he's always seemed SO healthy. Again, it's hard to not think about the worst case scenario when you get this kind of diagnosis. I try to tell myself to not think like that at all because we really don't know what's going on yet or how bad it is. I cried all day yesterday but today I feel numb. I feel like something is sitting on top of my chest and I cannot breathe. I love my dad so, so much. He is an amazing father and we are extremely close.

To make matters worse, he does not have health insurance. I don't know how that will affect him. He said that his doctor (who he's been seeing for over 10 years) is helping him figure all of that out. My dad is a small business owner and as things got tough financially, it was his health insurance that had to go. Because of his age and a pervious, (cured) heart condition he was nearly impossible to insure. He has always paid for what he needed out of pocket (any meds or basic doctors visits). None of us have ever had to worry about something like this - how to pay for an oncologist/surgery/cancer related stuff without insurance. It really is a worst case scenario. The last thing my dad wants to do is to leave his family in debt but I don't think any of us are thinking about that right now. All that matters is getting him treated.

Most important to my dad is spending time with his family. We live 6 1/2 hours drive away now and my dad was already planning to visit us in early April, so we are just going to stick with that. Me, DH and Reid are leaving to visit my in-laws out of state on Saturday and my dad doesn't want us to cancel our plans. Me, DH and Reid are also going to visit them on Easter weekend so I am very glad that I will get to see my dad twice in April. My poor sister and her family, along with my brother, live in Washington so it's harder for them to see my dad. I talked to my sister today and she will be getting some money in April and is planning on flying all of them down to spend with my dad as a family. Even if the prognosis is good, it's still cancer, and lung cancer at that and we need to make sure that we have that quality time together. I just hope that my sister and brother can afford to fly down. I'm sure between all of us we can make it happen.

Anyway, sorry, that was really long. Any thoughts and prayers are obviously appreciated. My dad's name is Stephen.

[petalfuzz]

My thoughts will be with you and your family during this time. I'm very sorry for your shock and hope for the best.

With a lack of insurance, do you think your dad would be interested in alternative treatments and/or change in diet and supplements?? there's lots of great resources out there if he's open to it. It would be a shame to just not do anything especially since he could easily live a long time, you know?

[Mars]

I'm so sorry about your Dad's diagnosis and my thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family. I am hoping for the very best outcome for him.

I don't know anything much about the health care in the US but it is fr this very reason that I appreciate the health care system here which is free. We pay higher taxes but it means that those who can't afford private care or who don't have health insurance don't have as big a burden.

(((HUGS)))

[*vi]

oh hun I'm sorry to hear about your dad's diagnosis. I hope everything turns out in the best possible way; for the time being, I will definitely keep your dad in my T&Ps.

[midnight_starr]

I am so sorry to hear this.. I will keep him in my prayers.

DH's mom fought breast cancer without insurance. She got enrolled in some sort of program for uninsured people and I don't think she had to end up paying much. Tell you dad to ask the doctors and just do some research, I am sure there has to be some program or something in his area that helps out in situations like this.

((HUGS))

[soImarriedAnerd]

Wow thats a lot to take in {{{HUGS}}} You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
KUP on what the oncologist says!! But one lobe of one side sounds like a good chance to me. I have a couple family members who have one lung removed and live active healthy lives now. I will pray it hasn't spread past that lump area.

[mrs.klynn]

Hope you don't mind, I'm popping in from WTTC and I just wanted to say that I'm really sorry to hear this Bre. Makes me sad to hear that another family has to face this, and on top of all of their worries they have to worry about how they will afford the care if needed/wanted. I'll be keeping you, your father, and the rest of the family in my prayers. Hugs.

[Resi]

How awful. I'm so sorry that your family has to go through this. Hopefully it was caught early enough and he will be okay. Was he a smoker? I know it can happen to anyone but am curious. T&P.

[fromGirltoMommy]

Oh sweetie Im so sorry Like Angela said that IS alot to take in at once!! My thoughts and prayers are with your family right now, please do update when you know more!

[Frozendesire]

Oh I'm so sorry. What horrible news for everyone involved. Please keep us updated on how everything goes.

[freesiangel]

I'm so sorry to here that Bre. Your family will be in my T&P's.

[..Penelope..]

I'm so sorry Keeping you and your family in my T&P.

[greeneyes]

Oh, Bre. I cannot even imagine all of the emotions everyone is going through right now.I will be keeping your whole family in my prayers, especially your dad. I am also very, very close with my dad and would be devastated if he called with news like this. I'm sending a lot of love and prayers your way. *hugs*

[Oriyan]

Oh Bre, I can not even begin to fathom what you must be going through We are all here for you and my thoughts are with you and your family!

[Bre*n*Will=Reid]

Thank you everyone.

My dad used to be a smoker but quit cold turkey over 15 years ago. It doesn't seem fair, but of course even people who have never smoked can get lung cancer.

In just a week he has gone from feeling reletively normal to very tired and short on breath. From what I've read and been told, that can be a result of the fluid in his lung(s) which will likely be sucked out. From what I hear, that will bring a lot of relief to him and make him feel better. Hopefully they will do that ASAP. He got a copy of his medical records and whille he doesn't understand them completely, it appears that there is an abornmality with the lining of his lung (too hard) and that one lung is smaller than the other. We won't know what any of that means until after his appointment today. I am totally freaked out (he is too) because originally they scheduled his oncologist appt for early next week, but then someone called and said that the doc wanted to see him today. I don't know if the doctor is just being a good doctor and doesn't want him to wait, or if the oncologist saw something really bad in his file/ct scan that makes him want to see my dad sooner.

We are ready to book a family trip to Palm Springs in late June (we all want to do it, especially my dad) but I'm afraid that my dad won't be well enough to go or that he will be doing some kind of treatment. Hell, if the diagnosis is bad he might not even be alive by then. I don't want to think about that. We all just want answers and we should get some today, but probably not all.

Keep praying. I appreciate that so much.

[*kyle*]

I'm really sorry to hear this. I will keep your dad and the rest of your family in my thoughts.

[~* Helen *~]

Oh Bre!!! I'm so sorry!!! Thinking of you all xxx

[Mars]

any update from today?

[ShannonMVT]

Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. I know you must all be so scared right now. Cancer is horrible.

[Bre*n*Will=Reid]

He had his first oncolgist appointment today. We were hoping for some answers but we didn't get any today. They scheduled his biopsy for Tuesday or Wednesday of next week and the follow up appt with the oncologist for Friday (although the results may not be in yet). They are doing a biopsy on the mass and then also extracting all of the fluid that has collected in his blood and analyzing it, along with full blood work. The results may not even be in on Friday, but that's what they are hoping.

My dad really likes the oncologist and he made my dad feel okay about things, considering. My dad (and stepmom) were both sounding pretty good on the phone. I think it was a relief for him just to talk to someone about it. The last 48 hours was torture, between a phone call "You have lung cancer" and having to wait to talk to anyone in person. Also, so far, his lack of insurance isn't affecting his care in the slightest. They tried sending him to a really fancy hospital (which he's been at before and knows the costs are higher) but he asked to go to a different one and they respected that, knowing that money is a concern. We will figure the money thing out. It's not a priority right now.

Thank you again for all of your prayers and well wishes. Me, DH and Reid are leaving to visit my inlaws tomorrow and will be gone for a week. Hopefully I can have a good time. I will update again when I know more.