Log In Sign Up

Ellemphriem


Forum: Blended Families

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Blended Families LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
November 9th, 2008, 10:23 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Florida
Posts: 2,091
Send a message via AIM to Blondzilla
You WILL let us know ASAP when you have that baby, right? And you KNOW we are going to want some pictures!!! I'm watching that countdown and waiting....How are you feeling?
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #2  
November 14th, 2008, 12:40 PM
Christy72
Guest
Posts: n/a
She is in my DDC and she had her baby on November 7th. Both her and baby are ok, but the birth was very bad for her. If you can keep her in your prayers that would be great.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
November 14th, 2008, 05:03 PM
Ellemphriem's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Dreamland...........
Posts: 2,646
Quote:
You WILL let us know ASAP when you have that baby, right? And you KNOW we are going to want some pictures!!! I'm watching that countdown and waiting....How are you feeling?[/b]
Hello ladies,

Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. The delivery was maybe the worst thing i had to go through in my life. We almost died out there, both me and Efie, and i had to go through the whole operation and recovery with only the spinal shot and 1 (count it) 1 painkiller in order not to put pressure on my liver. Now we are home and trying to recover. I cry almost constantly and i look in the mirror at someone whom i don't recognize. The little one is adorable, but i am thinking very seriously that this will be our only child. I don't know if i can bear to go through something like this every again. Maybe i am a coward. Don't know. But it is an experience i wish to no one out there.

I appreciate everything.....



Here is the link to the original post. I haven't found the strength to write down exactly what happened. I am still dealing with it. WE are all trying to deal with it.
http://www.justmommies.com/boards/index.ph...owtopic=1341960
__________________




" \m/ Now I知 riding through the air
going to where no one dares
on the way I値l cross the line forevermore \m/ "

Reply With Quote
  #4  
November 15th, 2008, 01:15 AM
Ellemphriem's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Dreamland...........
Posts: 2,646
Hi again,

Just posted some pics of her in my DDC Here is the link!

http://www.justmommies.com/boards/index.ph...owtopic=1346779
__________________




" \m/ Now I知 riding through the air
going to where no one dares
on the way I値l cross the line forevermore \m/ "

Reply With Quote
  #5  
November 15th, 2008, 03:46 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Florida
Posts: 2,091
Send a message via AIM to Blondzilla
Sweetie, she is perfect! Absolutely beautiful! I am so sorry you had such a tough time but remember that someday the memories of how bad it was will pass--otherwise no one would have more than one! I had all of mine thru c-sec and I will tell you that the first one was the hardest and by my 4th, I was up and walking around the halls the very first day, wanting to go home! I'm sure your doctor would want to to wait a while before even considering another pregnancy so you have time to think about it. I bet after you're feeling better you will consider it...but for now, just rest up and give that little baby a big hug and kiss from all of us here!
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #6  
November 16th, 2008, 07:47 AM
Christy72
Guest
Posts: n/a
I am with you Dani. I just had my 3rd c-section and my 3rd was by far my best. I was up walking around the same day he was born. It does get easier and after some time it won't be as bad. Hugs to you!
Reply With Quote
  #7  
November 16th, 2008, 11:33 AM
Ellemphriem's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Dreamland...........
Posts: 2,646
Quote:
I am with you Dani. I just had my 3rd c-section and my 3rd was by far my best. I was up walking around the same day he was born. It does get easier and after some time it won't be as bad. Hugs to you![/b]
Thanks you guys You know i just saw your delivery date.....5th of November..."Remember remember the 5th of November" (V for Venetta)
__________________




" \m/ Now I知 riding through the air
going to where no one dares
on the way I値l cross the line forevermore \m/ "

Reply With Quote
  #8  
November 20th, 2008, 07:23 AM
JustBecca's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Suffolk, Virginia
Posts: 3,058
Send a message via Yahoo to JustBecca
How are things going? Have they gotten any better?
__________________

Thank you ~* Helen *~ for the best all about me siggie! You are absolutely fabulous!
Reply With Quote
  #9  
November 21st, 2008, 07:13 AM
JustBecca's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Suffolk, Virginia
Posts: 3,058
Send a message via Yahoo to JustBecca
I was just thinking that I do not know about your family. What is your situation with your blended family?
__________________

Thank you ~* Helen *~ for the best all about me siggie! You are absolutely fabulous!
Reply With Quote
  #10  
November 22nd, 2008, 08:17 AM
Ellemphriem's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Dreamland...........
Posts: 2,646
Quote:
I was just thinking that I do not know about your family. What is your situation with your blended family?[/b]
Hi Yes things are a little better. Efie is waking us up every 3 hours and some days she just doesn't let us sleep. No choice there. I think the sleep deprivation is causing us weird symptoms. Like we started talking funny Also some tensions run between me and DH but those we pass quite easily. I think he understands what i am going through and i understand how much he needs to help so that smoothes things over. But we do need sleep..... When Efie allows us 7 hours of sleep a day (even though interrupted) we feel lucky My incision is getting better although there is still sensitivity and some pain occasionally. But it definately is not what it used to be 2 weeks ago. I have to do some more tests to see how i am fairing PP but not yet. Small problems come and go in me, and also i have unxeplaned anxiety at times and terrible moodiness. We talked to the doc and he said baby blues. I hope that's only that and NOT PPD Anyway that's it for us. As to the blended family situation, my DH has a daughter from a previous marriage. Dafni is her name and she is an adorable 9 year old who has a magnificent talent in painting and loves spongebob! We get her every other weekend, although these last ones we lost the program somehow because of the emergency c-sec the hospital stay and the fact that we have Efie home and she needs to avoid people for at least 40 days (lochia for mom, safety for little one). We were supposed to take Dafni today and my DH was gonna bring her home to see her little sis and maybe have lunch with us and then take her to his parent's home for the rest of the weekend, BUT her bio-mom said she didn't think we would take her 2 weekends back to back (we haven't taken her the weekend i was hopsitalised so we get to take her 2 back to back), and she hadn't studied for school. My DH said she could study with him. She said no way besides she will not stay with u this time she'll stay to her granma's ......she knows about the operation and all. I think she doesn't like the idea the little one to be to her granma's (previous problems and bickering ) Anyhow we didn't get her today, we will though next weekend. She is a very good child and very well behaved. I like her so much and i miss her a lot these days. So that's us in a nutshell.....


__________________




" \m/ Now I知 riding through the air
going to where no one dares
on the way I値l cross the line forevermore \m/ "

Reply With Quote
  #11  
November 22nd, 2008, 01:09 PM
merkelsgirl
Guest
Posts: n/a
She is beautiful!
Reply With Quote
  #12  
November 26th, 2008, 09:33 AM
Ellemphriem's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Dreamland...........
Posts: 2,646
Thank u
__________________




" \m/ Now I知 riding through the air
going to where no one dares
on the way I値l cross the line forevermore \m/ "

Reply With Quote
  #13  
November 26th, 2008, 06:55 PM
JustBecca's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Suffolk, Virginia
Posts: 3,058
Send a message via Yahoo to JustBecca
I am so glad that things are getting better for you. If you think that you might have PPD you should push the issue with your DR. I remember having horrible issues with my mental health after I had my 1st child and it was not easy to ask for the help that I really needed but I did it and I am so glad that I did.

I hope that you get all your visitation worked out with the little girl too.
__________________

Thank you ~* Helen *~ for the best all about me siggie! You are absolutely fabulous!
Reply With Quote
  #14  
November 26th, 2008, 11:43 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Florida
Posts: 2,091
Send a message via AIM to Blondzilla
Ahh those lovely hormones! First of all, you have been through giving birth, major surgery and a life threatening illness all rolled into one. Add to that the fact that you're not getting enough rest and therefore not able to recover from the surgery or birth and the fact that you're worrying about your health and the health of your new baby...well, I think you're entitled to a little moodiness! Right now, you need to treat yourself as though you just went through all of those things instead of as though you just "had a baby". That means the house can get messy, the laundry can be done by your husband (he CAN learn), and meals should be quick and easy....he can also learn that. The more rest you get, the quicker you will recover AND the better you're going to feel! Sleep anytime the baby does, keep nutritious snacks around--fruits, cheese, trail mix, etc and eat whenever you feel the urge.
The second thing to remember is that you have also not been feeling well throughout the pregnancy so you were a bit "run down" to begin with. We're always so quick to care for everyone else but when it comes to ourselves, we rarely give ourselves time to recover from illness. We're always so sure that our families are going to starve to death or not know how to do things for themselves that we get out of bed and take care of them like always. Now is not the time for that! If you don't take care of yourself, you'll get run down and be UNABLE to care for your baby! Treat yourself like a person who is recovering from surgery and illness. Like you would if you were someone else taking care of you. MAKE yourself rest. If that means hiring someone to come and care for the baby for a few hours a week or take care of the cleaning and meals, do it! They can make meals for a week and freeze them so your hubby can just pop them in the oven and it's done! It takes a FULL 6 weeks to recover from EITHER giving birth OR surgery. You've had both PLUS a serious illness! You're not going to feel like yourself for 6 weeks at the VERY least! Add to that the hormonal fluctuations that your body is going through and it's a wonder you're doing as well as you are! So don't feel bad about staying in bed and "pampering" yourself...it's not pampering! It's NECESSARY! You focus on YOU and that precious little girl...the rest will be there when you feel better!
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #15  
November 27th, 2008, 11:51 PM
Ellemphriem's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Dreamland...........
Posts: 2,646
Quote:
Ahh those lovely hormones! First of all, you have been through giving birth, major surgery and a life threatening illness all rolled into one. Add to that the fact that you're not getting enough rest and therefore not able to recover from the surgery or birth and the fact that you're worrying about your health and the health of your new baby...well, I think you're entitled to a little moodiness! Right now, you need to treat yourself as though you just went through all of those things instead of as though you just "had a baby". That means the house can get messy, the laundry can be done by your husband (he CAN learn), and meals should be quick and easy....he can also learn that. The more rest you get, the quicker you will recover AND the better you're going to feel! Sleep anytime the baby does, keep nutritious snacks around--fruits, cheese, trail mix, etc and eat whenever you feel the urge.
The second thing to remember is that you have also not been feeling well throughout the pregnancy so you were a bit "run down" to begin with. We're always so quick to care for everyone else but when it comes to ourselves, we rarely give ourselves time to recover from illness. We're always so sure that our families are going to starve to death or not know how to do things for themselves that we get out of bed and take care of them like always. Now is not the time for that! If you don't take care of yourself, you'll get run down and be UNABLE to care for your baby! Treat yourself like a person who is recovering from surgery and illness. Like you would if you were someone else taking care of you. MAKE yourself rest. If that means hiring someone to come and care for the baby for a few hours a week or take care of the cleaning and meals, do it! They can make meals for a week and freeze them so your hubby can just pop them in the oven and it's done! It takes a FULL 6 weeks to recover from EITHER giving birth OR surgery. You've had both PLUS a serious illness! You're not going to feel like yourself for 6 weeks at the VERY least! Add to that the hormonal fluctuations that your body is going through and it's a wonder you're doing as well as you are! So don't feel bad about staying in bed and "pampering" yourself...it's not pampering! It's NECESSARY! You focus on YOU and that precious little girl...the rest will be there when you feel better![/b]
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH YOU hit the nail to the wall! That is EXACTLY how i feel! Totally run down. And i guess it is a little too much to go through but i never learned to give myself a chance to relax. Never ever. You know ALL the tensions that run lately between me and DH is because he pressures me to go to bed and i pressure him to do the same. And we BOTH end up not sleeping. Yesterday he took over the little one the WHOLE night and he made me sleep a full 8 hours. I woke up quite refreshed and saw that my eyes were lacking those black circles. Of course i STILL WANNA sleep more (wow i mean wow that means being tired) but it was his turn to sleep it off another 8 hours and i am taking care of the little one. BUT it was the first night after 3 weeks that i rested enough and my sleep was undisturbed and productive I cannot seem to let things off my head. I need everything to be exactly how it should. As you said laundry made, dishes washed, dinner made and so on. My DH is following me around actually begging me to tell him what to do, or at least let him do it. When we talked he said 'i feel like i am not doing enough. You HAVE to let me do more and for you to rest'...i know he is right, but my subconscious is not allowing me to do so. Anyway i decided to make myself rest more honestly. I went for my frist PP tests AND everything concerning my liver came up NORMAL!!!! YIPEE! My diabetes is normal also. I know i have to do a GTT after the 6 weeks, but i don't know if i have the patience for it. I might as well do it here. I will buy a great big chocolate cake eat as much as i can and start checking blood sugar every hour. I'll know if there is something wrong. Also my thyroid blood results came up totally aligned Never had thyroid issues but the doc said to check it after pregnancy because many women get it PP. I have gone from 121 pre-pregnancy to 141 now and i cannot seem to loose it as i cannot exercise earlier than 2 months (for the exercise that i mentioned that is). I will start walking today though. My incision feels a LOT LOT better and i move around quite easily so i guess the recovery is going well. The doc checked it and said he was very satisfied with how it is going ......As for the rest i think we are trying to get our heads, thoughts and routines together. The little one is getting bigger by the day and the pediatrician that came yesterday found her to be very well. He said just keep up what you are doing. We must be doing something right hey? (even though we DON'T know what to do...hehehehe). AND i decided to give myself a chance and not be such a strong judge of me. As you said lady, what i went through was not easy. I am entitled to some moodiness...Just makes you think hey? How cruel we can be to ourselves sometimes....


__________________




" \m/ Now I知 riding through the air
going to where no one dares
on the way I値l cross the line forevermore \m/ "

Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:03 PM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0