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Introducing new baby to step kids


Forum: Blended Families

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  #1  
September 22nd, 2010, 07:22 PM
Arachne
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So, I'm over halfway to my due date. The kids know I'm pregnant, and the eldest is excited. I'm not quite sure the youngest understands, but I've been getting a lot of the 'new baby' type books, and I've been reading them to him. I've explained to him that there is a baby in my tummy, who will come to live with us after Christmas.

I'm just wondering if there's anything else I can do to prepare the step kids, especially the youngest. The eldest is in school, and the youngest will be starting preschool in a few months. I'm hoping the consistency from school staying the same will help them. I know kids need consistency and stability, and things will be a little hectic around here, with the new baby coming, and we'll be moving either a little before, or a little after the baby gets here.

I thought of an after school program for the eldest, so she can socialize with more kids her age.

I want this transition to go as smoothly as possible for everyone involved, so any tips, advice, anything is appreciated.
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  #2  
September 22nd, 2010, 07:37 PM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
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Location: Taneytown, MD
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Hrm. I'm not really sure there is much more you can do. Sounds like you're doing a lot already, which is great! It will definitely be an adjustment for them when the new baby comes, plus with the move around the same time.

Will they have to change schools when you move?
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  #3  
September 22nd, 2010, 07:44 PM
Arachne
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Nope. The preschool we have to take the youngest to, the eldest will be in the same school. We really like the school district, and are hoping to not move out of it. If we do have to move out of the school district, she'd still attend this school until the next school year started in the fall. Even then, there's a possibility she'd stay at this school. It just depends on how many spaces they'd have available for out of district kids.

We're moving so that we have enough rooms so that none of the kids would have to share their room. Each child will have his/her own room.

Edited to add... I'm also looking at the "New Baby" movies. Clifford has one, Sesame Street has a couple of them, and he loves Sesame Street. I hope those will help a little, too.

Last edited by Arachne; September 22nd, 2010 at 07:47 PM.
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  #4  
September 23rd, 2010, 06:27 AM
K.A.T's Avatar Enjoying her Sticky Bun
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: NYC
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Sounds like you're doing an awesome job so far. I really can't think of anything else to tell you that you can do. Good luck, I'm sure it will all work out
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❤ Big Thanks to Vicki, trishosaurus, & Shortcake for the great siggies of my kids! ❤
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Tiana (16) Doni (14) Lil Kev (8) Ethan 7/23/12 Lil Roo 10/29/11



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  #5  
September 23rd, 2010, 11:22 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2010
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Sounds like you are doing all the right steps! Keep up the good work!!
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  #6  
September 23rd, 2010, 12:50 PM
Arachne
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Pfew. Good. I've been racking my brain trying to think of other things I can do. The kids' mother has already told the eldest that her and her brother won't get any attention with the new baby, and that we'll make her do stuff ie, change the diapers, etc. Which, none of that is true.

This is mine and my husband's baby. She didn't ask for the baby to be created, and it's not her baby, so not her responsibility, so she won't be asked to do anything. That is unfair.

If you guys can think of anything else to help the process along, feel free to clue me in.
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  #7  
September 23rd, 2010, 12:55 PM
K.A.T's Avatar Enjoying her Sticky Bun
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: NYC
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My only suggestion is for once the little one is actually here. Don't deny them the baby. Not saying that you will. I hope you get what I'm saying. Like lets say one of the kids wants to see, hold, touch, kiss, the baby. Let them. If they want to help with feeding, diaper changes. Let them. Make sure that they feel included as much as possible. This was a key point with us with my dd and dsd when lil guy was born.
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❤ Big Thanks to Vicki, trishosaurus, & Shortcake for the great siggies of my kids! ❤
Liz (36) Kev (35)
Tiana (16) Doni (14) Lil Kev (8) Ethan 7/23/12 Lil Roo 10/29/11



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  #8  
September 23rd, 2010, 01:32 PM
Arachne
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I know what you're saying. I'm planning to exclusively breastfeed, and I probably won't introduce baby to a bottle until we've got our BF'ing routine established, and we've got it down good for 1 - 2 months. So, not even my husband will feed the baby for a while at first. I'm also planning to cloth diaper, so that might be a little much for them to help with. I think the youngest will be too young to help with the baby, if he asked to. I think he may also be too young to hold the baby for more than a minute, even with assistance.

Other than that, I don't mind any attention they want to give the baby. Although, I do want the eldest sitting down when/if she wants to hold the baby. I don't want her to get up and walk around with him.
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