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  #1  
May 2nd, 2011, 07:45 PM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Taneytown, MD
Posts: 114,806
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Who's here?
What's the most difficult thing you're dealing with right now in your blended family?
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  #2  
May 3rd, 2011, 10:30 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 9,029
I'm here.

We're in between difficult things - literally. We just went through dh's grandmother's death & funeral and how to deal with that. And we're coming up on the summer months. Hoping to get dh's youngest for some time this summer. We're planning on taking a family trip in July & would love her to come as well. But I have to light a fire under dh's butt to plan something. And of course, he will ask instead of stating. He acts like he hasn't got any rights. But that will never change. I just need to know because we are driving and renting a vehicle. If dsd comes, we'll get a mini van which is more expensive. If not we'll get something smaller.
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Kris

My 2 miracles: Lucinda & Noah
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  #3  
May 3rd, 2011, 11:10 AM
Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 196
Mother's Day. Ugh.
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  #4  
May 3rd, 2011, 01:45 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: East Coast :)
Posts: 1,331
...
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Last edited by loveneverfails; August 21st, 2012 at 03:23 PM.
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  #5  
May 3rd, 2011, 02:04 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 971
I am here.

We are dealing with K's mom trying to be the best friend instead of a parent. We tell her she can't do something and she calls mom and mom lets her do whatever.
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  #6  
May 5th, 2011, 01:32 PM
alyashlyn's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Arizona
Posts: 172
I'm here I just don't post that often. Lately I have been given the responsibility of doing the drop offs and pick ups for my stepson. So I get the joy of driving 2 hours each way into the middle of no where. Oh and what fun that is at almost 6 months pregnant, since there's no where to pee which I need to like every 30 minutes and sitting in the same position for too long makes my butt and legs go numb. And to make it even better I get to deal with my stepsons idiot mother who likes to try and make it seem like I'm not taking care of her kid because last time I dropped him off he had a scratch on his face, which he did to himself in the car because I was being a horrible stepmom and wouldn't allow him to pull my 5 year old's hair so he threw a massive tantrum. But other than that nothing else new.
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  #7  
May 8th, 2011, 05:18 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: cny
Posts: 3,230
Who's here? i'm here, just stoped posting for a million reasons

What's the most difficult thing you're dealing with right now in your blended family? mother's day, but my fam is support off helping .... him & his kid ... god everything, sometimes he's shows disrespect so she feels like she don't have to respect ,,, he had to go babysit the mother today so his daughter could see the mother ... she has been a pill dropper since long time ,, he saw this ,, wht did he want to have a kid with this woman i sometimes ask myself, but yet i say the same thing about me, now her older childen are doing it, i'm just so glad syd is here with us, she don't see that. & we fight what maybe 1 time a yr

second...UGGGG , and i know where she gets it from but if i hear Trisha's name ONE MORE TIME i'm gonna LOOSE IT ,,, UGG same with DADDY , DADDY can you help me with this DADDY tie my shoes DADDY stop talking to trisha DADDY , play with me... DADDY oh look what TRISHA is doing TRISHA is playing with your hat, OH are you chasing me TRISHA , oh do you want this TRISHA oh my good it eats me up and i tell her lisstin people sometimes whow who your talking to and after saying her name 50 times i think she knows her name by now.. ..and she does it more JUST to piss me off.....

can you tell i've been away awhile lmao.... ugg and JUST EAT, she was SOOO hungrey today she kept asking for a pickle so he let her have 2 then to wait for dinner cause it was almost done. he put a hotdog on her plate with 3 salt pootatos,,, she ate 1 potato & 1/2 the hot dog, then he let her MOW on sliced tomato's & 2 brownies after she said she was so full ...yes the tomato's are good, but she is not filling up with dinner , she gains 1 pound a yr,, she's almost 7 and still in 2-3T summer clothes

this will not happen with trisha dissert right after dinner at a res. one thing ponderosa, but at home DINNER is more important. if you ready for dessert RIGHT after dinner and you did not finish your plate of dinner ...no no no

ok sorry venting ,,,just makes ne crazy```
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  #8  
May 9th, 2011, 07:35 AM
K.A.T's Avatar Enjoying her Sticky Bun
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: NYC
Posts: 13,499
I'm here and dealing with the same ol crap just different day.
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❤ Big Thanks to Vicki, trishosaurus, & Shortcake for the great siggies of my kids! ❤
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  #9  
May 9th, 2011, 04:36 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: cny
Posts: 3,230
hugs ,, stupid. little stuff drives me crazy!!! i know she's six, but if a 1 1/2 is hitting you MOVE, what really more is when cori or daddy or his bro, or grandma, or grandpa is playing with trisha, ( tho she alreay is doing something with someone else ) she stops and buts in & takes control,,,, but then they will staqrt a game with syd & if trisha buts in syd crys & gets MORE atten..\\\\

she is also 6 almost 7 & is STILL getting her faather to tie her shoe's or put on her jacket or zipper her jacket up it buggs me, so i have her start getting ready for the school bus 7 minutes before it come,,,,, he b/c he plays and jokes around with her in the am wonders why she has no time in the am

she has 20 min in am with me to have fun color etc

with him no time and he *****es at her,,,well listen to me and take pointers

you guys unleased a lion i'm sorry, but thank you need to get this out
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  #10  
May 13th, 2011, 11:36 AM
Turtlesong's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Georgia
Posts: 151
edited

Last edited by Turtlesong; May 14th, 2011 at 04:52 AM.
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  #11  
May 13th, 2011, 02:23 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 9,029
((Stacey)))

I can't imagine having to deal with that. What a horrible human being she is. You child is having surgery?????? I just don't get it.

BTW I'd be crying too. She's so lucky to have you.
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My 2 miracles: Lucinda & Noah
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  #12  
May 14th, 2011, 05:03 AM
Turtlesong's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Georgia
Posts: 151
Thanks Kris. I don't really think she's a horrible person. The weird thing is that I like her. I'd probably want to be friends with her if I didn't know what I know and have seen what I've seen. She's nice to her when she has her but I don't think she thinks about her enough to matter. It's so weird to me DSD was so upset and has been through so much emotional stuff with this. It just drives me crazy to see my kids hurt and know there's nothing I can do.

On another note I believe I've been discovered on JM so I won't be posting for awhile. It's either that or something else because I've been deleted and blocked from her Facebook as of this morning. Oh well. Hate it. I'd added her back because some friends of hers lost everything in a fire and I was going to donate money. She had the link on her page. Unfortunately our financial problems hit about that time so I couldn't donate. I kept her on there because it was easier than deleting her and so she could see pictures of Aislyn. I usually delete any posts that have to do with her after a day or so because I use this name in a few places and I figured she'd find JM if she searched. She could be one of you guys and using an alias or just reading but who knows. I'll be reading and maybe posting once in a blue moon but nothing about her from now on

Last edited by Turtlesong; May 14th, 2011 at 05:05 AM.
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  #13  
May 14th, 2011, 03:01 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 9,029
Well I think she's a horrible mother to say the least. I can't imagine not caring if 1 of my children had surgery. Heck I can't every imagine not having full custody of my kids.

BTW - definitely not the woman.
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My 2 miracles: Lucinda & Noah
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  #14  
May 14th, 2011, 04:40 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: cny
Posts: 3,230
i'm sorry stacy i will def pay more atten,,,,, i just get so frustrated,, even today he had 20 minutes with Trisha ALLL DAY & syd did the same thin, he was playing with her for 1 sec & she butted in & takes over now she has the next 2 hrs along with the last 12 hrs with him.... & as of my daughter and i we have YET to get a hello....

again i'm sorry
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  #15  
May 15th, 2011, 06:22 AM
Turtlesong's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Georgia
Posts: 151
Quote:
Originally Posted by My2miracles View Post
Well I think she's a horrible mother to say the least. I can't imagine not caring if 1 of my children had surgery. Heck I can't every imagine not having full custody of my kids.

BTW - definitely not the woman.
I don't think it was Just Mommies now because she had blocked my DH on Facebook too. They weren't FB friends. She hasn't contacted us but I know why she's pissed. She hasn't paid Child Support in a year. DH had called her almost a month ago and told her she had to start paying. It was a year this month. She said she'd try but two weeks went by and she didn't respond on it. He went online and submitted an application to Child Support Enforcement. She got DSD and didn't mention the child support so he went on and submitted it. When we went to pick up DSD she tried to give him a check. Well the rules are that you can't accept money from them once you've started the process so he had to tell her to hold on to it right now. I know she was confused. I know she blames me because I talk about trying to collect from my Ex all the time. Difference is my ex is in another state and quits jobs as soon as they take out a few payments. It's went on for 5 years. She's paid for the most part till Oct 09 when she moved back to our state. She didn't pay anything till hubby called at tax time and she caught up then. Then she paid May and nothing since. Her 3rd DH lost his job right before their wedding and she said she'd be behind. Well they went to Disney World for their honeymoon. He got a job the following month but she hasn't paid anything since. What she doesn't realize is that DH would have turned her in 6 months ago if I hadn't talked him into waiting. I even told him he needed to call and try to collect before he turned her in. It's a whole lot easier to do it between yourselves than through the government. Once he turned her in it will always be through the government and payroll deductions so I thought he should wait till she had a chance with her taxes to catch up. Well she said they paid off his truck that was broken down and still not running with their taxes. I know she's mad at me because hubby brought up to her that she can afford the gym and he only knows because I told him. Yes, I think it's stupid for you to be paying $29 a piece for you and 3rd DH A PIECE to go to gym when you have a free gym at your job. Then to post that you don't mind paying the extra $10 A PIECE for hydro massages and how it's totally worth it??? Or to buy a Wii for yourself to exercise during this time. She does deserve to do stuff for herself. I'm not saying that she doesn't but still.... not when you're getting to be $3000 behind on your child support. Dealing with child support enforcement is totally different when she's in state too. My state is hardcore on it and license suspensions and jail time are automatic at certain points in the process. She made no effort to keep him apprised of some kind of timeline when she'd be able to start paying again or to pay partial payments.

Then you throw in how she is with DSD. They treat her well when they have her or talk to her but it's not on a regular basis unless you consider an overnight visit every 2-3 months regular. She called her on her birthday last August but didn't see her till September. Her Mom wanted me to bring DSD down for the evening in Sept so they could take her shopping for clothes, NOT actually get her for a weekend or overnight visit. They hadn't seen her since July. They live an hour away and most of the time I'm willing to drive the whole distance so they don't have to. My Dad lives a mile from her Mom so I go to visit him. Well I couldn't do that on a school night and my son had a dance the next night. They ended up getting her for an overnight visit. I'd have to go back but I don't think they got her again till Christmas. DSD has started calling & asking to visit since Christmas so they got her in Jan & Feb. It's been an overnight visit of about 24 hours every 3 mths since she moved back in Oct 09. She always says she needs to drop her off by lunch time so she can have time to do laundry??? I do laundry with 4 kids at my house on a regular basis. I don't work but I usually do mine on the weekend too. Then like I she said blew her off till recently. I was surprised that they called her the day of her surgery. I think it was because I made a point to post on her Facebook wall a reminder of the surgery when she posted a bunch of stuff about the cat. I just got irritated because here were all these people consoling her about the cat when her daughter was going under the knife. I was also posting a lot about what was going on. DDS did amazing and I was so proud of her. DSD gets so upset but she rarely ever talks about it. She wants reassurance all the time that I like our town and I'm not going to leave her like her Mom did. At 7 years old she finally asked why her Mom left her and who does she ask??? Me. I directed her to DH and he gave her an abbreviated kid appropriate response. That's the first time SHE'S EVER ASKED! I worry about what her Mom's going to tell her because they told DSD a ton of really bad stuff about her 2nd husband when they split. You don't do that!!!! It's not about YOU, it's about what's healthy for THEM. KWIM? We do not talk anything negative AT ALL about her Mom. There's rarely anything said about her around DSD unless she brings her up. DH and I talk privately but are extremely careful about what's said around her. He has always done that.

Sorry, said I wasn't going to talk about this...
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  #16  
May 15th, 2011, 04:39 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 9,029
Turtlesong, don't apologize. Sometimes you have to get it out. Being a stepmom isn't easy.

(((hugs)))
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My 2 miracles: Lucinda & Noah
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  #17  
May 16th, 2011, 12:37 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 772
here!
our oldest, he's 10, he's an extremely picky eater...will only eat cheese pizza, cheesecrisp, bagels, fruitloops...very bad diet...thanks to his great grandma on his mother's side... he's seeing a counselor just to talk about what's bothering him, different things..something his mother wanted to put him in but trying to get her on the same page as us with his eating is difficult. he's agreed to try different things so we wll see how it goes. did not go very well yesterday. she says she agrees with us and we can all work together but i don't know as if i believe her
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  #18  
May 21st, 2011, 07:23 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Ohio
Posts: 1,032
I'm here, back after being MIA for awhile.

Right now the most difficult thing we're dealing with is the whole school situation. My DSS just finished preschool (which I enrolled him in) and is getting ready to start kindergarten in the fall. My BF and I scheduled his kindergarten screening, took him there, and met with the teacher, principal, and school nurse afterwards to discuss his results. We have filed all the paperwork, got everything ready to go, and now all of a sudden BM decides that she wants to show interest. We have DSS during the week and every other weekend so it should be obvious where he goes to school, especially considering she hasn't even done one thing to prepare him for his first year. The first I even hear about it, is in the car on the way to preschool, DSS says that he changed his mind and he wants to go to school with his brother (BM's older son not with my BF) and that his mom said she would take him. I was immediately furious, not at my DSS, but at his mom for putting these ideas in his head because, even though he has no idea of this, you can't just pick and choose your school on a whim like that. As far as we know, she hasn't enrolled him or registered him anywhere, but it scares both of us that she might try to take full custody now that he'll be in school most of the day and therefore less work.
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