Log In Sign Up

Anyone else have DSD/DSS all the time?


Forum: Blended Families

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Like Tree4Likes
  • 4 Post By Rachel

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Blended Families LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
June 17th, 2012, 05:50 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 555
Whenever people ask me how often we have DSD, I tell them we have her all the time. BM has visitation every other weekend, but lost custody due to child abuse. Anyway, people always look at me like they are shocked. It has been a huge struggle to adjust to being thrown into the position of raising someone else's child. It has gotten easier over time, but it is still a challenge. Just wondering if anyone else has been through this?
__________________
Amanda
Mom to:
Quinn - 10
Gavyn & Kendric - 8
Joseph - 18 months
Step-mom to:
Kiersten - 8
Reply With Quote
  #2  
June 17th, 2012, 07:24 PM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Taneytown, MD
Posts: 114,704
Send a message via Yahoo to Rachel
We have the boys full time. Neely got full legal and physical custody after she was evicted from her home in 2009. She now wants them back, but it's likely that they will remain with us. We have trial in August.

Honestly, I'm not sure why people are so shocked that dads sometimes get full custody. Sometimes moms are bad parents.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
June 17th, 2012, 07:48 PM
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Norfolk, Va
Posts: 44
We have DSS 3 nights a week and 4 days. BM wants to give us custody full time. I get told I am a glorified baby sitter because I take him around like hes my own child. I dont understand why in a society where 50% of marriages fail. Its very hard to hear over and over again.

I have no children of my own so I find I dont have alot of things in common with other moms. I am slowly adjusting and things always get easier.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
June 17th, 2012, 08:00 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 3,769
we don't have the kids full time, but my brother got full custody of his two daughters and everyone was so shocked that a dad got it, which makes no sense a father is no less of a parent.
__________________






Reply With Quote
  #5  
June 17th, 2012, 09:12 PM
Happy Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Midwest
Posts: 21,659
Is it more females then makes? I know I'm shocked at how often, or not, people have their kids because I would die if they weren't in my care 100% of the time. So I just can't fathom it no matter who has custody.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #6  
June 17th, 2012, 09:14 PM
.Katie.
Guest
Posts: n/a
We have my stepdaughter all year and she see's her mom during school vacations.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
June 17th, 2012, 11:25 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,684
We're working towards having DSS full time. We have custody of DSD, DH just let her stay with her momma because she was so tired of moving and making new friends and her momma's situation got better. People are stupid, dads can be just as good as mothers.
__________________
J Married to D 08.21.2009
Bonus Mama to R (14) and M (7)
Warm up your home with a fabulous warmer and some of our scentsational scents! PM me for details!!!
Reply With Quote
  #8  
June 20th, 2012, 03:24 PM
ShesaDreamer's Avatar If Only. If Only <3
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In the Wild and Wonderful
Posts: 4,844
We have full costody of my 2 DSS. Their mom took them to florida for 6 months and violated the shared custody agreement so DH has temporary custody in 2005 and then in 2007 she lost visitation due to drug use and we have had full custody ever since. BM has been gone around half of the last 7 years.
__________________
Me 26

DD A:3 Autism, Global Developmental Delays


Reply With Quote
  #9  
June 20th, 2012, 06:21 PM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Taneytown, MD
Posts: 114,704
Send a message via Yahoo to Rachel
Quote:
Originally Posted by w292737
Is it more females then makes? I know I'm shocked at how often, or not, people have their kids because I would die if they weren't in my care 100% of the time. So I just can't fathom it no matter who has custody.
I agree. As a mom, I don't understand how another mother could walk away from her kids.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
June 20th, 2012, 06:39 PM
pmdc5286's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: GA
Posts: 1,703
Send a message via AIM to pmdc5286 Send a message via Yahoo to pmdc5286
We have my step-son about 85% of the time. His mom's house is just not the best environment for him. He functions well here and his behavior in school is much better here as well. We just got an order suspending my ex-husband's visitation with my DD who is 9 unless he is stone-cold sober and the visits are supervised by me or his mother or sister due to issues with him drinking. I have always had full custody of DS15. His bio father made a choice to not be in his life.
__________________
Patty






Thank you JMC1988 for my siggy!

TTC #3, Our first together




Reply With Quote
  #12  
June 24th, 2012, 01:30 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 555
I agree with all of you. I don't know how a mother could walk away from her kids. BM didn't really "walk away" from DSD, but she made choices that made it obvious that she was not a fit parent. In fact, it is my opinion that she should be in prison right now. The fact that she even got visitation is appalling. When DSD was an infant BM caused major physical harm to her. It disgusts me every time I have to see her face.
__________________
Amanda
Mom to:
Quinn - 10
Gavyn & Kendric - 8
Joseph - 18 months
Step-mom to:
Kiersten - 8
Reply With Quote
  #13  
June 24th, 2012, 04:26 PM
stucklikeglue's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: sunny state
Posts: 2,424
We have custody of dsd and my youngest des. We had custody of the other des until he kept getting in trouble here and decided to back to his moms.

Rachel, although I'm sure you didn't mean every mom, your statement made me upset. I lost custody to my son a year ago, the reason... beecause I was working and going to school, his father owns his own business so the judge gave him custody. I hate it! But it is what it is. I also had a really scrappy lawyer who didn't stand up for me. My son loves his father and even if I had the money to go back to court I don't think I could. Their bond is so strong.
__________________




Reply With Quote
  #14  
June 24th, 2012, 07:49 PM
KrazE's Avatar ShutTheFrontDoor
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,546
Edit to remove post
__________________
~~~~~~~~~~


Last edited by KrazE; July 9th, 2012 at 09:52 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #15  
June 24th, 2012, 08:21 PM
Doodlebug06's Avatar Doodlebug
Join Date: May 2011
Location: US
Posts: 1,397
I'll put my 2 cents =>

I gave my exh custody mostly of our 2 in our divorce because I knew I was unable to care for them properly at the moment. I had visitation which I used. I was going through mental problems.

I didn't walk away but chose to give them a better option for the time. Once I was better I did go back to court and we ultimately decided on a 50/50 parenting plan allowing us both a week at a time.

I think sometimes a parent makes the responsible choice of allowing the other patent or another caregiver to raise a child so that they are in a better situation. Similar to adoption. It doesn't make it easier on parent or child.


While I regret not having my children during the 2 years I am thankful they weren't in the tornado lifestyle I was going through at the time.
__________________

Jade Ja Kang
1-18-12
10:52 a.m.
18.5 inches
6lb 10 oz

Reply With Quote
  #16  
June 26th, 2012, 12:33 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 2,090
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rachel View Post
We have the boys full time. Neely got full legal and physical custody after she was evicted from her home in 2009. She now wants them back, but it's likely that they will remain with us. We have trial in August.

Honestly, I'm not sure why people are so shocked that dads sometimes get full custody.
Sometimes moms are bad parents.
This. SO has custody of his son... people are shocked and I don't know why. Guys can be just as good, if not better parents than the mothers.
__________________
HTML Code:
<a href="http://www.viravent.com/8/1085"><img src="http://www.viravent.com/8/1085/cntdwn.png"/></a>
Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:48 PM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0