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Dh's oldest (17) just called him. They think bio mom might have had a stroke. She lost feeling in her left arm & her the left side of her face is drooping. It's freaking us out on lots of levels. She's our age - 46, we just saw her on Sunday & she was fine and on Sunday she drove dsd (13) 4 hours from our house to theirs.
Dh's oldest is away at her grandmother's so right now dsd is staying with a friend. I'm pushing dh to think about getting her this weekend - of course depending on what they find out about her mom. If bio mom is ok then we'll wait until July 14 as planned but if bio mom is still in the hospital or needs lots of care there is no reason why dsd shouldn't be with us.
Ughh I really hate the lady but I don't want anything bad to happen to her. I hope she'll be ok.
She did have a stroke. We don't know the extent of the damage yet. Dh is getting this from his oldest (17) who is in another state visiting mil. So he supposed to get the # of bio mom's sister who is dealing with all the medical & financial decisions. The sister is in Texas & bio mom is in Wisconsin btw. I'm expecting that the sister will fly to Wisconsin at some point but don't know.
The doctor said this is as worst as it gets so that's good. But the recovery varies by person. And of course we don't know how much damage was done. But she is apparently talking at times because she told his oldest to stay where she is. No point in going home because there is nothing she can do. I have to give her credit for that. The oldest goes to mil every summer to be in a play in their local theatre. She's a really good at it & really enjoys it. So I'm glad bio mom is being practical & unselfish. I only hope that it is the same way with the youngest.
While youngest is 13, she shouldn't have to take care of her mother. And I guess bio mom is currently planning to go stay with her boyfriend. He has an elderly parent living with him that he takes care of so can't stay with her. Plus according to his oldest, there house is a nightmare for someone with a handicap.
So turns out her sister who live in Texas (she's in Wisconsin) is a nurse for a neurologyst & doesn't hate dh (whoohoo). So we've gotten some better information. So bio mom is talking, remember things from her childhood & gets inside family jokes. So that's a good sign. She is able to walk but they aren't lettin her unassisted just in case.
So it seems not a good thing but not too severe. Dh's is going to get dsd on the 4th of July. We're waiting that long because dsd's band is in the 4th of July parade & then doing a concert in the afternoon. She doesn't want to miss that.
Crazy dh or should I say idiot orginally was thinking he'd go get her on the 5th. I'm like ***?????? She's going to do a parade & a concert with no parent there? I know he was thinking of us because dd will also be in a parade here on the 4th. But I told him that I've got it. He's has to get get dsd.
He's working with the ex's sister. Not sure what ex thinks of this. I'm sure there will be fallout. She signed dsd up for an extensive dance camp that dsd doesn't want to go to. If dh gets her this week, she will miss it. Also, I'm thinking that we'll keep dsd until school starts for her which is after labor day. I'm sure bio mom will through a fit like last year & demand that it is only the 21 days of the divorce decree even if she can't parent dsd due to her disabilities. If dsd stays with us too long, she losed child support - we have 1 & she has 1. Dh's cs payment pay all of her bills & she only works part time even though she has a master's degree & is a licensed therapist. She make more working part-time than I make working full-time.