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  • 1 Post By Rachel
  • 1 Post By plan4fate
  • 1 Post By .Katie.

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  #1  
June 29th, 2012, 10:08 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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Dh and his ex went down to the courthouse last week to raise hell. We were getting notices about his support amount being owed, yet they wouldn't fix it to be the right amount.

After explaining it to FOUR different people, they got nowhere. L said "can't we just pretend this doesn't exist right now and he pay me? I'll waive it all, I don't want it from you guys." They fussed, but agreed.

But.. DH's divorce decree states, during unemployment times, he does not pay support. L fully agrees with this. But the department says they can't do anything about it accuring while he's unemployed since we don't have a return to work date. So really? He will ALWAYS be in arrears with this stupid system and I'm worried about his freaking passport!

L's had it up to her eyeballs with them, they wouldn't even talk to HER about the issue since she's not the payer... so they won't talk to me, wont talk to her, and while working DH is at work during the hours, they have no email system.... She's ready to just have us cut her a check weekly so it's all easily taken care of rather than months and months of red tape!


So.. in short. Support is paid. Yes, it took from October 3rd to last week to get 4 weeks of support properly tabulated and paid. But it is paid.

It's almost like they don't want to get L her money..... she and DH are really considering private pay (the non recommended option by the state cause they don't get fees, but it'd save each of them $65 a year, and DH $3 a week since his company charges him to deduct his support) just to make it easier since I'm going to be staying in town this time, so much easier to meet up once a week and exchange some funds than wait for the support office to get it handled!


Oh, we've also decided to not take Reme to Canada. We have run into some financial issues and it'll be cheaper and easier if it's just the two of us.
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Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Multiple miscarriages
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells Polypectomy - August 21st
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Trying a few cycles of clomid and progesterone. FX this is all it takes.
Cycle 1: Clomid cd3-7 ~ bfn
Cycle 2: Clomid cd 3-7 ~ beta negative (< 3)
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  #2  
June 30th, 2012, 06:50 AM
Keakie's Avatar Learning to walk in faith
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I think I'm a little confused by the way Woody's state does support. He has to pay through a system and the courts make money off of the support too? Weird, and that does sound hugely annoying. Dh just "writes" a check online and it gets sent to bm twice per month. It's more or less the same process we use to pay bills online (except that those are direct deposit and we don't do direct deposit for support anymore for a couple of reasons).

I'm glad it's resolved for the time being anyway! Sorry that Reme won't be able to come to Canada after all. That stinks.
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  #3  
June 30th, 2012, 01:49 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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he was really good and mature when he visited in Ohio.. but now that we're home.. he hasn't matured a single oz since last summer. I put a movie on for him yesterday and put head phones on him to see if he'd watch it or non stop talk to us regardless... and he talked. Dh doesn't like to travel/drive... he all but begged to wait until next year (we're considering flying not driving next year) to take him.

DH's employer charges him $3 a week to deal with child support. The state charges each of them $65 a year ($135 total) for administrative costs. Initially they told L she had to use a state visa debit to receive her support, which costs money to use?! She had to fight for them to just deposit it in her checking account.

It'd be so much easier to just send her/take her a check every week or every other week. Heck her husband drives this way 5 days a week, he only works about 3 miles from our apartment.

Wi is so not making it easy on people to pay their support. The woman at one point told DH that he should have just paid the requested amount "like a good father". The requested amount was 21 weeks of support vs the 4 he actually owed. Good father or not... we can't really afford to give L $2700 gifts.
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~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Multiple miscarriages
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells Polypectomy - August 21st
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Trying a few cycles of clomid and progesterone. FX this is all it takes.
Cycle 1: Clomid cd3-7 ~ bfn
Cycle 2: Clomid cd 3-7 ~ beta negative (< 3)
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  #4  
June 30th, 2012, 05:21 PM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
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I never went through child support enforcement to get my support from my ex husband. I think Maryland changed the law since then and everyone is required to now. And the state hires a private company to take care of it (Maximus) and I hear complaints about them all the time.
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  #5  
June 30th, 2012, 07:26 PM
.Katie.
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He should still have to pay CS when he is unemployed. It's not like kids suddenly don't cost money anymore just because he isn't working. I'm confused.
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  #6  
June 30th, 2012, 07:33 PM
.Katie.
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He won't always be in areers. But he will be as long as he keeps losing his job. This isn't the states fault. I don't understand why you're so upset.
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  #7  
June 30th, 2012, 10:10 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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Quote:
Originally Posted by .Katie. View Post
He should still have to pay CS when he is unemployed. It's not like kids suddenly don't cost money anymore just because he isn't working. I'm confused.
They have a 50/50 order while he's unemployed. L had the choice to waive her support, or to pay DH while he has Reme. We are all glad she made the choice she did more than ever with how freaking hard it is to get them to do anything.

And yeah Katie he would be in arrears at all times. It took them from October to June to fix the error that started in September and was reported IN September. As of 2 days ago his first missed payment was registered.... and it could take months to get it fixed again. As it is.. she hasn't received her most recent three payments due to them being backed up. If we paid her directly... it's like 25 minutes round trip for one of us... that's the kind of delay that's reasonable.. 3 weeks is insane!
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~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Multiple miscarriages
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells Polypectomy - August 21st
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Trying a few cycles of clomid and progesterone. FX this is all it takes.
Cycle 1: Clomid cd3-7 ~ bfn
Cycle 2: Clomid cd 3-7 ~ beta negative (< 3)
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  #8  
July 1st, 2012, 06:35 AM
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I'm glad you got it worked out. I hope you can get it set up to just cut the check.

And correct me if I'm wrong but your dh doesn't loose his job, his work is project based not constant.
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  #9  
July 1st, 2012, 08:52 AM
Rachel's Avatar Just Rachel
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Quote:
Originally Posted by .Katie. View Post
He won't always be in areers. But he will be as long as he keeps losing his job. This isn't the states fault. I don't understand why you're so upset.
Correct me if I'm wrong Ashley, but he doesn't "keep losing his job". The nature of his work is such that he's technically unemployed while he's in between jobs with the same company.
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  #10  
July 1st, 2012, 11:37 AM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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Yes Kris and Rachel you are correct. DH doesn't "keep losing his job", he works in Power Plant repair, multi million dollar jobs with thousands of people all over the country. The mid west (our area) offers usually two jobs a year. One 12-20 week job and one 8-12 week, (spring and fall)... so the men have two unemployment stints a year. This is expected (and since the men work 12hr days 7 days a week, very much anticipated lol) and he was doing this work Reme's whole life.

that's why there is a provision in the decree regarding it.




*however* if DH was to get fired or quit... L could fight for support as it's not an expected unemployment stint. I doubt she would, but she could.
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__________________
~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Multiple miscarriages
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells Polypectomy - August 21st
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Trying a few cycles of clomid and progesterone. FX this is all it takes.
Cycle 1: Clomid cd3-7 ~ bfn
Cycle 2: Clomid cd 3-7 ~ beta negative (< 3)
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  #11  
July 1st, 2012, 08:32 PM
.Katie.
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LOL I always project my own crap here! I'm sorry for mistaking your meaning. My ex can't hold down a job, and also thinks he shouldn't have to pay support while unemployed. When someone is unemployed I assume it means no job!

I still don't fully understand your set up, but you guys do and that's what matters!!!
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  #12  
July 2nd, 2012, 12:40 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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I think if DH had moved into this type of work AFTER the divorce they wouldn't have done it... but since he'd been doing this since long before Reme was born it really doesn't change the way of life that he was used to. If L needed money bad enough she'd ask, and we'd give it to her. She really does take into consideration that we live off just enough to pay bills and ferry reme back and forth during the summer. It's tighter this year since she quit her job, but she starts a new one next week at least.


Though she is driving DH crazy over the last payment due. They register online before she gets them, but the last one hasn't shown up yet. She wants to know if it came out of the check or not, and asks daily.. but we haven't even received the pay check yet! And if we ask for a reprint of it, it won't show up for 3 months.
__________________
~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Multiple miscarriages
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells Polypectomy - August 21st
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Trying a few cycles of clomid and progesterone. FX this is all it takes.
Cycle 1: Clomid cd3-7 ~ bfn
Cycle 2: Clomid cd 3-7 ~ beta negative (< 3)

Last edited by plan4fate; July 2nd, 2012 at 12:44 PM.
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