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anyone that thinks you shouldn't marry someone with kids if you don't know how you will handle it, how many people in their mid 20's do you know that don't already have a child or children?[/b]
Lots of young adults are not parents. but I see your point. I don't mean don't marry someone with kids- I mean don't marry someone with kids who you have resentment towards (mild or otherwise), don't marry a man with kids with the attitude that his kids are annoying and you can't wait until they go home or don't visit.....that was all I ment....because then you are seperating the 'husband' from the 'father' when they are one and the same.....How would any step mother feel if it were the other way around, what if your current marriage fizzeled and you dated and met a lovely man who by the way could not stand your child, or children, how would that change your opinion on him??
Not saying you have to think the step kids are angels, but if you are going to be anything that ends in 'mother' tp any child, you should not resent them or be jealous of them or wish they were not around...if the children are that unpleasant to be around then motherhood in general should be seriously considered because all they are are your young or soon to be created children in fast forward....
At 6 and 8 the kid is still able to be influenced by your loving and good influence...don't think these kids can't sense they are not 'loved' and wanted around because they can...hence the problems many of you are having...
I fear that I may be coming off the wrong way, I am in a blended family myself and I know we all have rough patches and need support ...It is just sooo sad and heartbreaking to see that a 6 or 8 year old child is being resented by a parent, step or otherwise...
I have 2 step daughters who are older now and the only thing i can say to make you ladies feel better is they get older so they understand things better so in turn you get on better with them hope this makes sense mine are 20 and 18 and i have a pretty good friendship with them both
Ok locking this one up as it still is turning into more of a debate. Nobody likes to have the finger pointed at them and that is NOT what this board is for, it is for support. If people choose to debate this issue then feel free to do so on the heated debate board.