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Step son and new baby


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  #1  
December 10th, 2004, 07:38 AM
lynn_uk's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Cheshire, UK
Posts: 844
Hi guys,

Can I join you?

My step son is 11, we only see him during holidays but get on really well. So well that he prefers being with us than being at home - he is very thoughtful and clever and his mother is definatly NOT. We are hoping that at some point soon he will want to stay with us - he does say he wants to, but is also at the age where he still needs his Mum, even though she can be really horrible sometimes.

His Dad (Mick) has told him about his soon-to-arrive new brother (dates and photos below) and he seems happy. So far I have not started any conversations about it with him - I try to treat him as very grown up and figure he'll talk to me when he's ready.

So ... he's coming up for Christmas and New Year (yes - his Mum is very happy for us to have him ) and I don't know whether to continue as I have been or to bring the subject up.

Anyone been through this? I'd love to hear of anything that might come up or questions he might ask.

thanks

Lynn
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  #2  
December 10th, 2004, 07:44 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: arlington, va
Posts: 21,980
you might say something casual like "so do you think the baby is going to be a boy or a girl" and it might get him to tell you more.
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  #3  
December 10th, 2004, 08:00 AM
lynn_uk's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Cheshire, UK
Posts: 844
Good idea. He has already said a few things, but his concentration goes elsewhere within seconds.

Last time we went shopping I was looking at soft drinks and he said (from nowhere) "Ginger ale helps". I know his Mum's friend had a baby last summer but I was not expecting that from him.

As I said - a very thoughtful kid
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  #4  
December 15th, 2004, 09:36 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Central Pa
Posts: 2,156
Maybe he could help put up the crib or pick out some things for the baby..be sure to get him something then as well.

He seems like a smart kid, and will probably welcome the baby with open arms!

Oh, does his dad have any baby pics of him? Maybe you can look at them with him.
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  #5  
December 17th, 2004, 01:19 AM
lynn_uk's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Cheshire, UK
Posts: 844
That's a good idea. The cot (large crib?) we're getting is still in use by a friends little boy, but I should have a pram he can have a look at. We also have a car seat, I'll get him to test fit it in the car.

Thanks for that, I don't want to force him into talking, I'll see what he says next week.

Unfortunatly we need to tell him that we can't see him at Easter, Easter is 25-26 March and I'm due 23rd March. That's going to be hard I think.

Lynn
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  #6  
December 22nd, 2004, 12:25 PM
lynn_uk's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Cheshire, UK
Posts: 844
So ..... Went to pick up Cy for the holidays today. Within 2 minutes of him driving away from his Mum he was asking me if we had chosen a name for his brother yet. He also said that he will give his brother all his baby videos

So I don't think we have a problem.


BTW, his Mum said that as her boyfriend had just lit a cigarette she could not invite me in, so I sat in the car while they got him ready to leave. (It's only a 4 hr drive home). What I saw of the house looked a state, the boyfriend smelt of beer and fags at 2 in the afternoon and Cy says they have not even bothered with Christmas decorations. I had to pester to get warm clothes packed - I know I'll have to buy more clothes for him as she does not. I also had to pester to get the boots that we bought for him only 3 months ago, she said "but he doesn't have any boots"!!!

I just wish he could stay with us.
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