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Hi ladies, I know this is the perfect place to come to get an answer to my question. My daughter is 5, 37lbs and still in a harness forward facing in a Graco Nauti. It seems to me that her straps need to be adjusted, as in go up one slot, but when I put them up, it seemed like it was up too much. But the lower slot seems to low. I took some pictures to see what you think. The seat is not in my car at the time, as I took it out for a cleaning and to adjust it.
Keep them on the upper slot. It is ok for them to be above her shoulders a bit. She will grow into it and it won't look as strange to you. Your child is just at the point where she's outgrowing the lower one and is at the very beginning of the new, so it looks off (but it isn't!).