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Forum: Trying to Conceive with Medical Assistance

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  #1  
July 22nd, 2008, 12:21 PM
KatieHeitman's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I am so sad. Yet, I feel so guilty. My sister is pregnant and had an ultrasound done today at 8 weeks. She sent me the picture today and it's so cute! I can see it's head, arms and legs. She was worried that something was wrong so she went in to see the doc. When she said she felt like something was wrong I wanted to cry because I was so scared for her. I don't want her to have another miscarriage. Well everything turned out to be okay with the baby, so now I want to cry again because it's not me that's pregnant. I'm so sad, but I also feel guilty for feeling sad that it's not me. She had a miscarriage a few months after I did, but yet I am still not pregnant even after three rounds of Clomid. We have an appointment with a fertility specialist on Monday. I can't wait, I want aggresive treatment. I'm so mad at myself for feeling the way I do about my sister's pregnancy. How come I have to feel so much mixed emotion? I want to cry!
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  #2  
July 22nd, 2008, 12:35 PM
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Location: Missouri
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Quote:
I am so sad. Yet, I feel so guilty. My sister is pregnant and had an ultrasound done today at 8 weeks. She sent me the picture today and it's so cute! I can see it's head, arms and legs. She was worried that something was wrong so she went in to see the doc. When she said she felt like something was wrong I wanted to cry because I was so scared for her. I don't want her to have another miscarriage. Well everything turned out to be okay with the baby, so now I want to cry again because it's not me that's pregnant. I'm so sad, but I also feel guilty for feeling sad that it's not me. She had a miscarriage a few months after I did, but yet I am still not pregnant even after three rounds of Clomid. We have an appointment with a fertility specialist on Monday. I can't wait, I want aggresive treatment. I'm so mad at myself for feeling the way I do about my sister's pregnancy. How come I have to feel so much mixed emotion? I want to cry! [/b]
You're not alone in feeling like that. I have friends who are pregnant and I feel the same. I am soooo happy for them but on the other hand so jealous! I think this is just a real test of who we are as human beings. I think it is ok to be happy in front of them and then go home to cry. That is what I do, at least. Good luck!
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  #3  
July 22nd, 2008, 01:33 PM
jandswood's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I think it is normal to feel like that. I have two kids and I am so very happy I have them but yet this TTC stuff is hard on me emotionaly. I see pregnant women and alot of women around me are pregnant too and it is hard.
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  #4  
July 22nd, 2008, 01:48 PM
valerie26's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I agree with the previous posters. I feel that way every time I find out someone I know is PG.

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  #5  
July 22nd, 2008, 06:01 PM
Jessa78's Avatar Super Mommy
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Honey, please don't be so hard on yourself. My little sister is pg (by accident) and due in October. DH and I have been trying very hard for almost three years now without success. I'm not angry with my sister and I really AM HAPPY for her but it breaks my heart, nonetheless. If it didn't matter so much, I think I would have given up on this dream a long, long time ago.

I try to think of it this way: my feelings come from my heart, not my head. They don't have to be reasonable and I can't out-think them. They just are. So sometimes I have to hide them to survive them but I don't have to apologize for them. It's real and it hurts and I'm dealing.

to you, hon! You are a very good sister and I hope that she gets to hold your hand through your pregnancy very, very soon!!


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  #6  
July 22nd, 2008, 06:31 PM
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Heck, I get mad at all the stars getting PG or having babies. Ha!
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  #7  
July 22nd, 2008, 06:51 PM
kmannetta2005's Avatar Veteran
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That is a totally normal feeling. Don't be hard on yourself. TTC is very stressful as it is but when people around you are getting pregnant and you aren't.....it can be very hard. I have a handful of friends that are PG after just one try and I hated how jelous I felt but came to realize that I am really deep down happy for them I just wish it were me. Keep your head up sweetie. It will happen some day for all of us.
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  #8  
July 22nd, 2008, 07:01 PM
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AWWW Don't beat yourself up. This whole thing is so emotional and draining it wears on the best of us. We all understand where your coming from though!!!! BIG HUGS!!!

AWWW Don't beat yourself up. This whole thing is so emotional and draining it wears on the best of us. We all understand where your coming from though!!!! BIG HUGS!!!
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  #9  
July 22nd, 2008, 07:22 PM
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I agree with all of the pp. It is okay to feel that way. I have quite a few friends that are currently pregnant, and it hurts sometimes to see them. And of course, whenever we get together, all the talk revolves around pregnancy. It is hard. But we are STRONG. All of us will get through it.
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  #10  
July 22nd, 2008, 09:22 PM
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Dont feel bad!!!! I feel the same way all the time.. Tonight my BF called and said guess whos preg. I was like ummm..She said her sil I was like ohh I bet she is sooo happy she said well yeah this was her first month of tring..my bf just had a little girl after tring for one month too.. She knows I have been tring for 4 1/2 years....OOO I just want to SCREAM!!!!! sorry i am ranting!! I hope you get to feeling better!!!
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