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Forum: Trying to Conceive with Medical Assistance

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  #1  
January 7th, 2011, 12:44 PM
♥Ashley♥'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: St. Louis, MO
Posts: 14,102
if there ever was anything going on in there, its over. Again.



You wont hear of a BFP from me again until it is proven by a beta. Im so sick of being embarassed time after time posting BFP's and feeling like "this is it..." and then being proven wrong, time and time AGAIN.
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Cycle #1-9 - All Natural....5BFN's, 4BFP's (all ended in miscarriage)
Cycle #10-11 - Met with first RE, diagnosed with heterzygeous MTHFR mutation & slightly low SA on all counts. -BFN, Cycle #12 - First IUI+Trigger - BFN, Cycle #13 - BFN
Cycle #14-15 - Met with new RE, diagnosed with a blocked right tube that previous RE completely overlooked or didnt care to mention. Soy (120mg) - BFN
Cycle #16 - Clomid (100mg) - BFN, Cycle #17 - Clomid (100mg)+Trigger+IUI - BFN
Cycle #18 - Acupuncture+Clomid (100mg) - BFN
Cycle #19-27 - 2 Soy (160mg) cycles, the rest all natural also 30lbs lost!! - BFN's
Cycle #28 - New RE is GREAT! Put on bcp 7/6/11, Lap surgery 8/1/11- Tubal cyst (5cm) found and removed, Uterine Septum removed, and Stage II-III endo removed. Cycle #29 - All Natural - BFN, Cycle #30 - All Natural - BFN, Cycle#31 - All Natural - BFN, DONE TTC FOR NOW




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  #2  
January 7th, 2011, 12:49 PM
Lash's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: North Texas
Posts: 17,544
OH INSERT CURSE WORDS HERE. LOTS OF THEM.


Been following girl, and didn't want to post anything just yet, but god I'm so mad for you. Lots of curse words and tears and hugs you might not feel but are totally there in spirit.
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"I will make it through this because it is for her and for her, I will do anything. I am not brave, I am not strong, I am just Rhiannon’s mom". Our TTC/Adoption/Pregnancy Blog: Jump Over The Rainbow

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  #3  
January 7th, 2011, 01:10 PM
SarieP's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Virginia
Posts: 2,683
OMG this totally sucks. I'm so sorry girl :dothugs:
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  #4  
January 7th, 2011, 01:34 PM
adnelg775's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 1,232
Don't ever feel embarrassed...we're here for you no matter what!
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  #5  
January 7th, 2011, 01:36 PM
tabbymichelle's Avatar GO BUCKEYES!!! O-H-I-O!
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=( I am sorry Ashley!
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Tabitha & Ryan; Married on Saturday, April 17, 2004 -TTC #1 for 7.5 years. Missing our Angels...

Dx with PCOS at age 14.
Miscarriage in June 2006
2 cycles of Clomid 50mg
1 cycle of Clomid 100mg resulting in miscarriage
Dx with Adenomyosis on 1/28/10
Clomid 150mg 4/30(day 3) - 5/4(day 5) Ultrasound on May 10th.
5/10 - Ultrasound showed 2 perfect follies! (15mm&17mm) Ovulation predicted within 6 days! Progesterone check ordered for 5/20.
5/27 - New round of Clomid started, no ultrasound this cycle, 2 more cycles planned on our own. If no bfp, onto next step!
6/27 - Round 3 Clomid 150mg started.
7/25 - AF Showed, starting final round of Clomid 150mg on CD3
8/21- AF Showed, In the process of finding a new RE
*Waiting to see our new RE



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  #6  
January 7th, 2011, 02:15 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Baltimore, MD
Posts: 1,770
GRRRRRR!! I'm so sorry this keeps happening to you. I've been secretly stalking you in TTC#1 and have been praying hard that this is it. Big huge hugs sweetie! What does the Dr say about all of these early losses? You ARE NOT imaging all the BFP's!! I hope they can figure out something soon. Thinking of you!
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  #7  
January 7th, 2011, 02:15 PM
*Melissa*'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Oregon
Posts: 4,564
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I agree, don't you EVER feel embarressed!!!! I am so sorry about AF showing, and more important the loss of another baby My heart is aching for you hun. I am so sorry. I hope your Dr. can figure out what is going on.
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  #8  
January 7th, 2011, 02:20 PM
LindseyandJoeinAL's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 1,612
I'm so sorry Ashley. Please don't feel embarrassed! We all celebrate the BFPs and mourn the losses together. We are a little family and we want you to share everything you want to. I hope you find some peace and the hope to try again. ((((HUGS))))
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Lindsey - 38
Joe - 46
TTC baby #2

lap surgery Apr 2010 stage 2 endo removed
IVF #1 BFN 11/2010
IVF #2 BFP! 12/2010
Wonderful, sweet daughter Khloe born August 2011
FET #1 - Oct 2012 BFN
FET #2 - Dec 2012 BFN
2nd lap surgery Dec 2012 stage 1 endo removed
IUI Apr 2013 cancelled due to producing 10 mature follicles
IUI June 2013 BFN
IVF #3 Sept 2013 BFN
IVF #4 Nov 2013 BFP! on 8dp3dt
Expecting boy/girl twins 8/1/14

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  #9  
January 7th, 2011, 02:32 PM
♥Ashley♥'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: St. Louis, MO
Posts: 14,102
Quote:
Originally Posted by LeahBonilla View Post
GRRRRRR!! I'm so sorry this keeps happening to you. I've been secretly stalking you in TTC#1 and have been praying hard that this is it. Big huge hugs sweetie! What does the Dr say about all of these early losses? You ARE NOT imaging all the BFP's!! I hope they can figure out something soon. Thinking of you!
To be honest, my RE is extremely crass about my "airquote" (I swear she does airquotes everytime she says "your miscarriages") losses. She doesnt "count" them unless there is beta proof. And ive only made it to a beta ONE time and that was my very first pregnancy. All the other times by the time I get in there to get a beta im miscarrying already. And then after she started talking about my losses like they never happened and im crazy that just turned me off to even going and attempting to get bloodwork. Its embarassing to be talked to like your a little kid reading a pregnancy test. When we went in for our IVF consult we were talking about the losses and she actually said "alleged miscarriages" it really really hurt my feelings, and I said no they WERE miscarriages I got positive pregnancy tests with every single one and she said well that "medically" means nothing to me, I need hard copy evidence it happened. It hurt my feelings SO bad, I feel like she was denying my "babies" ever existed.
__________________
Cycle #1-9 - All Natural....5BFN's, 4BFP's (all ended in miscarriage)
Cycle #10-11 - Met with first RE, diagnosed with heterzygeous MTHFR mutation & slightly low SA on all counts. -BFN, Cycle #12 - First IUI+Trigger - BFN, Cycle #13 - BFN
Cycle #14-15 - Met with new RE, diagnosed with a blocked right tube that previous RE completely overlooked or didnt care to mention. Soy (120mg) - BFN
Cycle #16 - Clomid (100mg) - BFN, Cycle #17 - Clomid (100mg)+Trigger+IUI - BFN
Cycle #18 - Acupuncture+Clomid (100mg) - BFN
Cycle #19-27 - 2 Soy (160mg) cycles, the rest all natural also 30lbs lost!! - BFN's
Cycle #28 - New RE is GREAT! Put on bcp 7/6/11, Lap surgery 8/1/11- Tubal cyst (5cm) found and removed, Uterine Septum removed, and Stage II-III endo removed. Cycle #29 - All Natural - BFN, Cycle #30 - All Natural - BFN, Cycle#31 - All Natural - BFN, DONE TTC FOR NOW




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  #10  
January 7th, 2011, 02:35 PM
Lash's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: North Texas
Posts: 17,544
Is there any chance you can switch, or is she a doc that specializes in MTHFR?
__________________
"I will make it through this because it is for her and for her, I will do anything. I am not brave, I am not strong, I am just Rhiannon’s mom". Our TTC/Adoption/Pregnancy Blog: Jump Over The Rainbow

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  #11  
January 7th, 2011, 02:42 PM
♥Ashley♥'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: St. Louis, MO
Posts: 14,102
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lash View Post
Is there any chance you can switch, or is she a doc that specializes in MTHFR?
I just switched to her earlier last year after dealing with another crappy Dr. She really is a great Dr and has the best success rates in St. Louis, so im torn. Especially when it comes time to do IVF in a few months (if im still not pregnant) her rates are the highest in missouri.
__________________
Cycle #1-9 - All Natural....5BFN's, 4BFP's (all ended in miscarriage)
Cycle #10-11 - Met with first RE, diagnosed with heterzygeous MTHFR mutation & slightly low SA on all counts. -BFN, Cycle #12 - First IUI+Trigger - BFN, Cycle #13 - BFN
Cycle #14-15 - Met with new RE, diagnosed with a blocked right tube that previous RE completely overlooked or didnt care to mention. Soy (120mg) - BFN
Cycle #16 - Clomid (100mg) - BFN, Cycle #17 - Clomid (100mg)+Trigger+IUI - BFN
Cycle #18 - Acupuncture+Clomid (100mg) - BFN
Cycle #19-27 - 2 Soy (160mg) cycles, the rest all natural also 30lbs lost!! - BFN's
Cycle #28 - New RE is GREAT! Put on bcp 7/6/11, Lap surgery 8/1/11- Tubal cyst (5cm) found and removed, Uterine Septum removed, and Stage II-III endo removed. Cycle #29 - All Natural - BFN, Cycle #30 - All Natural - BFN, Cycle#31 - All Natural - BFN, DONE TTC FOR NOW




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  #12  
January 7th, 2011, 03:07 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Hoosier Girl!
Posts: 10,470
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Just lurking Ashley. I am so sorry for your REAL loss. I think your RE is awful for not acknowledging them. If there is anyone else in the area I would definately switch. I know there isn't much we know about treatment of MTHFR, however, after my third early loss, my RE put me on lovenox BEFORE implantation. Both of the next pregnancies where I was on it before implantation have stuck...I have a 17 month old and I am now 20w pg. I believe 100% without a doubt that the reason I have my babies is because I was on the lovenox so early. I started on it around 5 DPO those cycles. I know not every RE believes that it works but I have no doubt that it does.

Just a thought. ((HUGS))
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  #13  
January 7th, 2011, 04:20 PM
Hoping To Be A Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: TEXAS
Posts: 3,639
I hope you're ok babe. I'd say a new RE asap! How gross.. "air quotes" can go to H.e.LL. I swear, it's like some doctors trade in their hearts for brains. I am so sorry. I know how you feel. It was confirmed I miscarried today. We can be cycle buddies though since we are both CD 1.. We'll get through it together, love.
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  #14  
January 7th, 2011, 04:23 PM
JulieC's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 3,436
I am so sorry!
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  #15  
January 7th, 2011, 04:35 PM
Lash's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: North Texas
Posts: 17,544
UGH I hate whenever you feel stuck with someone, but you know their stats are so good. I felt exactly the same about my RE, and to be dead honest, part of my ambivalence about my RE is part of what made me quit TTC. Had I had any emotional connection to my RE, or had he not been so blase or dismissive, I might have wanted to soldier forward "together" with him by my side. But since he was so dismissive of my "oh those are only what we call chemicals honey, it's not a real miscarriage", I was pretty done and didn't really feel all that motivated to return.

Shame, since he has the highest rates around and is listed in like the top 20 docs in the friggin NATION for infertility. I can't say I totally feel you because I don't want to act like I know what you are feeling, but I feel like I get it pretty well
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"I will make it through this because it is for her and for her, I will do anything. I am not brave, I am not strong, I am just Rhiannon’s mom". Our TTC/Adoption/Pregnancy Blog: Jump Over The Rainbow

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  #16  
January 7th, 2011, 04:41 PM
KMH KMH is online now
TTCMA Cheer Captain
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: right of center
Posts: 18,927
Ashley, that totally sucks! Please don't feel embarrassed...your babies are special and loved no matter what your RE says. I hope that you can find some answers soon, honey
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IVF babies Claire (3), Abigail (1) and George (1)

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  #17  
January 7th, 2011, 05:10 PM
ShesaDreamer's Avatar If Only. If Only <3
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In the Wild and Wonderful
Posts: 4,844
Big hugs. I've been in your situation twice now. I announce my BFP then a day or 2 later the pregnancy is gone. i'll be thinking of you.
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  #18  
January 7th, 2011, 06:27 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: NY
Posts: 6,083
I'm sorry But please don't be embarrassed. A life is a life, no matter how short. And a loss is still a profound loss, no matter how early
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  #19  
January 7th, 2011, 06:40 PM
MommytoaMiracle's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 10,571
Wow- Your doctor sounds like an emotionless ******!
To say your babies weren't "real" earns her a punch to the face! Who the hell is she to amke such a BOLD assumption! Like you're stupid & can't read a pregnancy test! Ugh! What NERVE!

I'm SO sorry hun for your loss! I can't wait to see this nightmare end for you!
We are here for you!
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  #20  
January 7th, 2011, 06:59 PM
OurSweetLabs's Avatar I LOVE My Boys!!
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 11,003
I am so so sorry for your loss

Your doctors sucks....
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