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Oh man... I've been feeling kinda down


Forum: Trying to Conceive with Medical Assistance

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  #1  
January 7th, 2011, 08:55 PM
LindseyMarie's Avatar Professionally Awesome
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And I just had this thought..

This is the 5th calender YEAR we've been TTC. In 2007 we had our losses, and started NTNP, Summer 08 we started TTC, 09 we started going to my RE, spent all of 2010 doing fertility treatments, and now it's 2011, and we are no closer to a baby than we were in 2007, in fact, it's worse since my endo and ovaries are so bad now..

Maybe part of that is why I feel so down. That, post op, and the looming IVF.
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After years of trying, 2 years of fertility meds, multiple surgeries, blood draws and needle sticks, some awful pre-IVF complications, and endometriosis and PCOS,
We are done TTC. Praying for peace as we accept this...
Hoping for some comfort after our most recent (and 3rd) surgery and starting Lupron!







Last edited by LindseyMarie; January 7th, 2011 at 09:03 PM.
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  #2  
January 7th, 2011, 09:52 PM
Hoping To Be A Mommy
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Location: TEXAS
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Aw, love. I am so sorry. I can only imagine how you must feel. I know all too well the highs and lows of TTC. One day you're up, the next few you're down...

I hope you start to feel better and I definitely hope a bfp is in your very near future..
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  #3  
January 8th, 2011, 03:26 AM
adnelg775's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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OUR IVF w/ ICSI 2/2011=TWINS!

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  #4  
January 8th, 2011, 04:20 AM
Angel_Maker
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Hunnie, I'm so sorry...

DH and I started TTC in 2006, so I know what you're feeling. I wish I could say that currently being pregnant magically erases the hurt and bitterness I feel towards TTC and infertility, but it doesn't. It just makes me "fear" the worst even more. I fear losing Aaliyah for all of the obvious reasons, but from an infertile woman's perspective, the thought of having to "start over" again makes me so anxious.

I really pray that you get your very soon. You are so deserving and have been so patient
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  #5  
January 8th, 2011, 06:41 AM
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Im so sorry Lindsey ...... This whole journey of TTC is so consuming-- mentally, physically & in all aspects of our lives. Some women just have no idea what we go through. I cringe at the thought of approaching the 3 yr mark with absolutely nothing to show for all that time (except a bunch of receipts to the RE, & empty wrappers of OPK's!) I hope that 2011 is magnificent for us (esp. us MA girls !!!)
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  #6  
January 8th, 2011, 09:07 AM
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I remember having that feeling when we were trying for #1. It was so hard watching each new year go by. It was also hard to see people getting pregnant who started a year or two after us

You'll get there...something will work and you 'll have that baby
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Secondary Infertility Blog*~*http://onemunchkin.blogspot.com/ *~*

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  #7  
January 8th, 2011, 03:50 PM
Celena's Avatar Proud JM hostess
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I'm very sorry that you're having a hard time right now, it gets very emotionally and physically taxing... some days are just so much harder than others it's overwhelming! Take time for yourself, let yourself release however you need to the pain in your heart. Pamper yourself, which I know sounds cliche` but sometimes it helps just to do something for YOU. It doesn't replace or take away the pain, but it can lift you up a little by treating yourself good when you're down.
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07/30/09@6wks3dsEDD 03.23.10 08/21/09@5wks EDD 04.21.10 02/08/10@8wks3ds EDD 09.17.10
01/07/2011@ 6wks3ds EDD 08.28.2011 7/ /11 @6wks5ds EDD 02.27.12












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  #8  
January 8th, 2011, 04:20 PM
tabbymichelle's Avatar GO BUCKEYES!!! O-H-I-O!
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I am sorry! =( I definitely know how you feel! We started TTC in 2004 right after we were married. Since I have started school and DH travels out of town all of the time, it's become hard for us to see an RE so that's basically been put on hold. In the back of my mind, I am not sure if it will ever happen for me but I am still praying it does. I pray that you get your bfp soon!!!
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Tabitha & Ryan; Married on Saturday, April 17, 2004 -TTC #1 for 7.5 years. Missing our Angels...

Dx with PCOS at age 14.
Miscarriage in June 2006
2 cycles of Clomid 50mg
1 cycle of Clomid 100mg resulting in miscarriage
Dx with Adenomyosis on 1/28/10
Clomid 150mg 4/30(day 3) - 5/4(day 5) Ultrasound on May 10th.
5/10 - Ultrasound showed 2 perfect follies! (15mm&17mm) Ovulation predicted within 6 days! Progesterone check ordered for 5/20.
5/27 - New round of Clomid started, no ultrasound this cycle, 2 more cycles planned on our own. If no bfp, onto next step!
6/27 - Round 3 Clomid 150mg started.
7/25 - AF Showed, starting final round of Clomid 150mg on CD3
8/21- AF Showed, In the process of finding a new RE
*Waiting to see our new RE



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  #9  
January 8th, 2011, 10:09 PM
Jacquie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm sorry...this is all such a hard process.
__________________
TTC #1:
5/20/05:
5/27/05:
5/28/05: miscarriage
08/27/05:
08/30/05: miscarriage
01/15/05: misdiagnosed with PCOS
08/29/06: first appt at fertility clinic (was already pregnant with dd and didn't know it)
08/31/06:
05/16/07: DD was born

TTC #2:
11/13/09: let's try again!
03/10/10: tests with new OB - everything totally normal for DH and I, no indication of pcos; officially diagnosed with "Unexplained Infertility"
04/21/10 - 10/13/10: 7 unsuccessful rounds of clomid with OB
11/13/10 - 14/23/11: 3 unsuccessful IUI's with clomid at fertility clinic
07/27/11: ER for IVF - retrieved 27; 17 were mature enough to fertilize; all 17 fertilized; 11 made it to day 3 embryos; 6 made it to day 6 blasts. Transferred 1, froze 5.
08/08/11: positive hpt!
08/13/11 - 08/20/11: positive blood test (186), but cramping and bleeding. 2 days later, blood at 275; 2 days later, blood at 21. Inevitable miscarriage.
10/13/11: start suprefact for first FET
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  #10  
January 9th, 2011, 09:27 AM
LindseyMarie's Avatar Professionally Awesome
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Thanks guys... sometimes it's a pretty low feeling... I told DH how I was feeling and he was literally speechless, I don't think he realizes how long this process has been until it's pointed out to him like that. I spent the evening a friends house who just went through a miscarriage at 12 weeks (with her husband deployed) and we just vented... there is a girl in one of my church group was due within days of my last BFP (the faint one we had in the beginning of December.. the blue one) and every time I see her I don't even know what to say, because I ache so much.

I'm hoping my post op appt tomorrow can help me at least see what we are dealing with now...
__________________



After years of trying, 2 years of fertility meds, multiple surgeries, blood draws and needle sticks, some awful pre-IVF complications, and endometriosis and PCOS,
We are done TTC. Praying for peace as we accept this...
Hoping for some comfort after our most recent (and 3rd) surgery and starting Lupron!






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  #11  
January 9th, 2011, 10:45 AM
LindseyandJoeinAL's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Posts: 1,612
I'm so sorry you're feeling down Lindsey. There just aren't any words to comfort you, but know that we're all here for you!! (((HUGS)))
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Lindsey - 38
Joe - 46
TTC baby #2

lap surgery Apr 2010 stage 2 endo removed
IVF #1 BFN 11/2010
IVF #2 BFP! 12/2010
Wonderful, sweet daughter Khloe born August 2011
FET #1 - Oct 2012 BFN
FET #2 - Dec 2012 BFN
2nd lap surgery Dec 2012 stage 1 endo removed
IUI Apr 2013 cancelled due to producing 10 mature follicles
IUI June 2013 BFN
IVF #3 Sept 2013 BFN
IVF #4 Nov 2013 BFP! on 8dp3dt
Expecting boy/girl twins 8/1/14

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