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Forum: Trying to Conceive with Medical Assistance

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  • 3 Post By *Leah*
  • 1 Post By Lucy S.
  • 1 Post By Lindz253
  • 2 Post By MandyEllen
  • 2 Post By cutenurse24
  • 1 Post By *Whiskey*
  • 1 Post By kayakr

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  #1  
April 4th, 2013, 07:27 PM
kayakr's Avatar Persuaded by POAS’ers
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Midwest
Posts: 3,751
BFF: Does Jason (DH) have any miles you could use to go to Orlando with me next week? Tues night - Thursday? John is going for work and me and you can go and hang out and enjoy the 3 big pools. Just need the ticket to fly. It will be 87 and sunny.

Me: I would love to and DH probably does have enough miles for me to go but I am having embryos transferred into my uterus next week.

BFF: Darn !!!

Okay so I get BFF doesn't understand any of this TTCMA stuff and has been pretty distant for 6 months because of it. However, I just asked her Friday for prayers because this was all going down now and needed her prayers. My BFF has 3 kids and got pregnant with all three of them within one or two months of going off the off the pill. So I get that she doesn't understand any of this but nor does she even try. Not even a "good luck" She thinks I am nuts at 43 doing this. She is my age and her youngest is 4 so it's not like we are in different worlds or something. This is the same friend that tells me I am making a mistake because there wont be another kid as good as my DS is and has been to date.

Thank you guys my TTCMA ladies for being there for me when some of the people I love the most can't be. They just don't have the equipped and it's no fault of their own.
__________________
Gretchen
Me (43) DH(33) 12 years together - ttc our first together-I have 14yr old DS
Cycles 1-6 = BFN
Cycle 7 SA results abnormal morphology 2%, 50 mg clomid = BFN
Cycle 8 sonogram normal 50 mg clomid + trigger = BFN
Cycle 9 SA results abnormal morphology and motility. Count 200 mill, 100mg clomid + trigger = BFN
Cycle 10 natural = BFN
Cycle 11 hsg tubes clear, natural + trigger+IUI = BFN
Cycle 12 repronex + trigger + 2 IUI = BFN
Cycle 13 natural ovaries to stimulated for more meds = BFN
Cycle 14-22 natural cycle with Acupuncture and planning ivf/icsi/DE = ALL BFN
Cycle 23 Clomid 50 mg & Progesterone = BFN
Cycle 24 Natural = BFN
Cycle 25 BCP, SA result 7% morphology = BFN
Cycle 26 BCP and Lupron preparing for IVF
Cycle 27 IVF Acupuncture, DE Retrieval April 7, Transfer April 12 =
7 eggs retrieved, 3 fertilized, 2 transferred - zero snow babies
BETA # 1 16DPO or 11dp5dt = 569
BETA # 2 19 DPO or 14dp5dt = 1078
BETA # 3 22DPO or 17dp5dt = 2414 TWINS!
BETA # 4 30DPO or 25dp5dt = 12,685 6weeks 3days 2 heartbeats! 114 & 116
Clayton and Colton Born @ 34 weeks 11/22/13
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  #2  
April 4th, 2013, 07:34 PM
*Leah*'s Avatar TTC the newfashioned way
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 3,436
While you say it's no fault of their own, I still think she should have the common understanding of a "good luck" or "I'll be thinking of you"! But to just say DARN???!!! I mean, even if she doesn't understand why you are doing it, she could be supportive and acknowledge that this is a BIG thing that is happening in your life right now!

You are taking it WAYYYY better than I would. But I'm glad you are getting it out and not letting it bother you. You don't need negativity around you right now. ((HUGS)).

I for one am SOOOO excited for your transfer next week! come on PUPO!!
kayakr, *Whiskey* and katydae88 like this.
__________________
TTC#1 since 10/2006, 5 failed IUI's, 1st IVF successful BFP!! Baby Girl 2/2011
TTC#2 BFP 9/2011, Natural Pregnancy! 3/30/12 M/C'd on 5/15/12 (9 weeks)
IVF#2 BFP 4/2013 M/C 6/2/13 (8 weeks)
FET #1 BFP 8/2013 - Chemical Pregnancy
IVF #3 - Retrieval Oct 31st, Txferred 2 on 5d - a Blast and Morula - Chemical Pregnancy
IVF #4 - ER scheduled for 4/4/14 retrieved 4 eggs. Txferred 3 embryos 4/7/14!....BFN...NOW WHAT?
Check out my NEWBORN Hats and Baby Items
@ http://www.facebook.com/ThePaisleyPerle


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  #3  
April 4th, 2013, 07:47 PM
kayakr's Avatar Persuaded by POAS’ers
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Midwest
Posts: 3,751
and for her not even to remember that it is happening now and invite me to travel and party. How do you not remember that I have this going on?

I love her and am trying to give her the benefit of the doubt but she is making it hard. lol She never even responded after the " DARN" comment.
__________________
Gretchen
Me (43) DH(33) 12 years together - ttc our first together-I have 14yr old DS
Cycles 1-6 = BFN
Cycle 7 SA results abnormal morphology 2%, 50 mg clomid = BFN
Cycle 8 sonogram normal 50 mg clomid + trigger = BFN
Cycle 9 SA results abnormal morphology and motility. Count 200 mill, 100mg clomid + trigger = BFN
Cycle 10 natural = BFN
Cycle 11 hsg tubes clear, natural + trigger+IUI = BFN
Cycle 12 repronex + trigger + 2 IUI = BFN
Cycle 13 natural ovaries to stimulated for more meds = BFN
Cycle 14-22 natural cycle with Acupuncture and planning ivf/icsi/DE = ALL BFN
Cycle 23 Clomid 50 mg & Progesterone = BFN
Cycle 24 Natural = BFN
Cycle 25 BCP, SA result 7% morphology = BFN
Cycle 26 BCP and Lupron preparing for IVF
Cycle 27 IVF Acupuncture, DE Retrieval April 7, Transfer April 12 =
7 eggs retrieved, 3 fertilized, 2 transferred - zero snow babies
BETA # 1 16DPO or 11dp5dt = 569
BETA # 2 19 DPO or 14dp5dt = 1078
BETA # 3 22DPO or 17dp5dt = 2414 TWINS!
BETA # 4 30DPO or 25dp5dt = 12,685 6weeks 3days 2 heartbeats! 114 & 116
Clayton and Colton Born @ 34 weeks 11/22/13
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  #4  
April 4th, 2013, 08:22 PM
Lucy S.'s Avatar POAS addict
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Bay area CA
Posts: 6,046
What a crappy friend you are for not hanging out with her! Sheesh Gretchen!!


One of my friends is toying with the idea of a tubal and is worried about feeling "less of a woman" because she won't be able to have kids and that I "should be able to relate if anyone can" This was today, me PMSing an all!
kayakr likes this.
__________________
Lucy
Due with #3
10 IUIs= one confirmed /IVF= BFN / FET= / FET2= Baby!
My blog


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  #5  
April 5th, 2013, 05:20 AM
smsturner's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Upstate, NY
Posts: 3,730
DARN??!??!??? Holy crap.

And you can relate to being less of a woman? Wow. That's just assinine.

I can't believe people, and I will NEVER understand them. How awful for her not to be remembering you and wishing you luck instead of offering you a trip to her party!!
And I don't even have words for that woman who says you can relate to being less of a woman. She CHOOSES for this operation. Doesn't she understand any of the things you've felt?? And I hope that you know that of course, you are a perfectly wonderful, beautiful whole woman!!
__________________
Susan, dh Tom, dd Megan (14), ds Marcus (12), Our new baby Dean





I never knew until that moment how badly it could hurt to lose something you never really had. - Missed Miscarriage at 10 weeks - 3/26
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  #6  
April 5th, 2013, 05:34 AM
melissaleigh's Avatar Unashamed POASer
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 1,221
Sorry she is not being supportive at all right now. People get wrapped up in what's going on in their own lives sometimes and seem to forget what's going on with others. I know it's super disappointing but you seem to be taking it all pretty well
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  #7  
April 5th, 2013, 05:44 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 12,271
All she said was darn? I would have been hurt by that. At least follow it up with a good luck, I will be thinking about you! But like Leah said, you don't need the negativity or stress about how friends react. Focus on your lining and having a great transfer!!
melissaleigh likes this.
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  #8  
April 5th, 2013, 06:09 AM
MandyEllen's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 1,452
I wish that people understood the emotional toll this takes on a couple, especially the woman in the couple going through IF. I'm sorry that your BFF didn't say anything supportive.
We all need to stay away from the negativity and remember our goal of having a child! Keep on keeping on!!!
smsturner and melissaleigh like this.
__________________
Mandy (34)
6/29/13 - transferred 2 embryos
7/10/13 - 14 dpo beta=300
7/12/13 - 16 dpo beta=825
7/19/13 - 23 dpo beta=18,870
7/26/13 - 30 dpo beta=72,091


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  #9  
April 5th, 2013, 06:48 AM
Raunchero's Avatar Happy as a Clam :)
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,272
i would not have been so sweet... i would have let her have it. lol
__________________
Rochelle











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  #10  
April 5th, 2013, 07:43 AM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 890
Gretchen, I completely understand. The amount of heartache that comes with it is horrible. I know that you really want your buff there for you like you would be for her. As hard as it is, try to keep only the good thoughts.' I realize that my bff is *special* which means I get extra blessings for loving the difficult ones and this comes in perfect time as my embies will be coming soon!'
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  #11  
April 5th, 2013, 11:56 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: TN
Posts: 5,592
Wow!!! I can't believe that all she could say is darn to you. I'm sorry that she wasn't more supportive or sending well wishes your way. But that is why you have us Sending lots of hugs, positive thoughts, and positive vibes your way!!!
kayakr and katydae88 like this.
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  #12  
April 5th, 2013, 07:56 PM
*Whiskey*'s Avatar Blessed
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,744
I was wrong... We might need the bail money after all!
kayakr likes this.
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Jen
~ * ~ * ~ * Always believe that something good is going to happen * ~ * ~ * ~

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  #13  
April 6th, 2013, 06:46 AM
kayakr's Avatar Persuaded by POAS’ers
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Midwest
Posts: 3,751
Yes between the hormones, BFF and stalking donor there is a good chance !
*Whiskey* likes this.
__________________
Gretchen
Me (43) DH(33) 12 years together - ttc our first together-I have 14yr old DS
Cycles 1-6 = BFN
Cycle 7 SA results abnormal morphology 2%, 50 mg clomid = BFN
Cycle 8 sonogram normal 50 mg clomid + trigger = BFN
Cycle 9 SA results abnormal morphology and motility. Count 200 mill, 100mg clomid + trigger = BFN
Cycle 10 natural = BFN
Cycle 11 hsg tubes clear, natural + trigger+IUI = BFN
Cycle 12 repronex + trigger + 2 IUI = BFN
Cycle 13 natural ovaries to stimulated for more meds = BFN
Cycle 14-22 natural cycle with Acupuncture and planning ivf/icsi/DE = ALL BFN
Cycle 23 Clomid 50 mg & Progesterone = BFN
Cycle 24 Natural = BFN
Cycle 25 BCP, SA result 7% morphology = BFN
Cycle 26 BCP and Lupron preparing for IVF
Cycle 27 IVF Acupuncture, DE Retrieval April 7, Transfer April 12 =
7 eggs retrieved, 3 fertilized, 2 transferred - zero snow babies
BETA # 1 16DPO or 11dp5dt = 569
BETA # 2 19 DPO or 14dp5dt = 1078
BETA # 3 22DPO or 17dp5dt = 2414 TWINS!
BETA # 4 30DPO or 25dp5dt = 12,685 6weeks 3days 2 heartbeats! 114 & 116
Clayton and Colton Born @ 34 weeks 11/22/13
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  #14  
April 6th, 2013, 08:56 AM
zonee@gmail.com's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 216
I am sorry, that is pretty crappy. I hope all goes fabulous with your transfer and you get a bfp! I can get that "fertile" people aka people who do not need help getting pregnant may not fully understand but then they should ask you if you want to talk about it or do some research so they can have some understanding so they can be there for you and be a good support system : (
Sending prayers and nothing but happy thoughts your way!
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