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Forum: Trying to Conceive with Medical Assistance

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  #1  
February 11th, 2007, 07:31 AM
Rina42308's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Temp is 98.7 this morning but I guess that doesn't mean anything because I tested, BFN.
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  #2  
February 11th, 2007, 07:46 AM
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I'm so sorry! I got a BFN this morning too. I am pretty bummed.
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  #3  
February 11th, 2007, 07:54 AM
*CAMM*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I had my fingers crossed for both of you!! First thing i thought of this morning was to get on here and see how the testing went for you ladies.
Im really sorry you got BFN's
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  #4  
February 11th, 2007, 08:29 AM
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Oh I am SO sorry that you got a bfn.....
I cried for you..dont loose hope until AF shows...
who knows it might be too early?

as for me... im to chicken to test yet..pathetic I know but I have a two day trip planned and dh and I decided to go enjoy and test when we got back tomorrow nigh o Tuesday at th doctor...

Norina, I am so sorry ..
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  #5  
February 11th, 2007, 08:48 AM
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oh Norina! I'm so sorry! I really thought this was it for you! I don't even know what else to say, but that I am so sad
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  #6  
February 11th, 2007, 10:05 AM
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I'm so sorry you got a BFN. It just never gets easier... each time feels so awful. I hope that you recover from it soon and begin to get hopeful again for another cycle. It's hard, but it just keeps going on.
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  #7  
February 11th, 2007, 10:14 AM
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Norina I am so sorry you didn't get a ++ today. It just doesn't seem go get any easier seeing a BFN month after month.
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  #8  
February 11th, 2007, 11:42 AM
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I'm so sorry you got your BFN today. I was really hoping for great things from all of our testers this weekend. It's just so frustrating to keep getting those negative results.

You need to keep your chin up though and keep your great attitude going - I just know your time will come very soon!
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  #9  
February 11th, 2007, 11:59 AM
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Darnit! I was going to get on 1st thing this morning but meds got the better of me. I'm sooooo sorry! I wish I could have been there to twitch my nose & make it a BFP. I know it will happen, it will for the both of us. No one goes through this much pain & gets nothing. I'm sorry sweetie!
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  #10  
February 11th, 2007, 12:04 PM
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Im sorry Norina and Alexa

I really hoped you two would of got bfps.
Best of luck for next cycle girls

((HUGS))

Sarah
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  #11  
February 11th, 2007, 01:33 PM
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I'm so sorry!!!!
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  #12  
February 11th, 2007, 01:38 PM
Rina42308's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I don't know if they'll be a next cycle. I don't know how much more of this I can take.
To everyone else it's "no big deal"...to me it's everything. Honestly I don't think I could get over not having a child of my own. what if it is all for nothing?
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  #13  
February 11th, 2007, 01:54 PM
Blessedx3
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soo sorry to hear that hun..... but remain hopeful to af shows...
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  #14  
February 11th, 2007, 02:25 PM
juls2006
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oh Norina, i'm so sorry. i've been thinking about you lately and was really hoping to see you get your bfp. my fingers are still crossed for you. please don't give up hope. i know how frustrating and draining all of this can be and i have wanted to give up so many times. but we have to have hope because without it we don't have anything. it will happen, just keep believing and have faith that you can get through this and one day you will have your miracle. if you need to talk please pm me! ((((HUGS))))
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  #15  
February 11th, 2007, 03:43 PM
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I am just so confused...why is when I had a septum and Dh only had 3 million sperm we could get pg no problem...and now, now that everything is suppose to be "fixed", we can't get pg. 3 *$%# eggs, 40 million sperm stuck right there and it didn't work???? Seriously? It feels hopeless.

it's not fair. All I want is one. why is that asking to much of God? Why does he answer some people's [prayers and not ours? What makes other people so worthy or special??? what are we doing that's wrong?
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Mommy to miracle baby 4/23/08 and four babies in heaven:lost 3/22/05 edd 10/28/05, lost 5/25/05 edd 12/26/05, lost 1/31/06 edd 9/19/06

"Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has." -Margaret Mead
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  #16  
February 11th, 2007, 04:25 PM
juls2006
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i don't think we're doing anything wrong. this isn't our fault and it's nothing we did or didn't do. i ask myself those same questions all the time and i don't know why it's so easy for some people and not for us. especially those who seem to have it so easy and they don't even want it. i wish i knew why and i wish i could tell you something to make you feel better but i just don't know. i'm so sorry your having such a hard time with this.
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  #17  
February 11th, 2007, 06:18 PM
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It's really hard to find a reason why these things happen... I've definitely been there before. A week ago I was the happiest I've ever been when that darn HPT turned positive... just to find out it was a chemical pg. I had about 2-3 days after that that I thought I was done... couldn't do it anymore, why did god hate me, etc... all the same feelings. The only thing I can say is that now, almost a week later, I'm starting to get excited about starting again. At least I'm collecting some strength to start again. It's natural to want to give up now, because it's so hard, physically, emotionally, mentally, and socially. Feel free to let out all that anger and just know we've all felt the exact same things after each BFN. It doesn't make any sense and there's no way to explain why we are the ones who have to endure this crap. I just hope that you find some sort of peace with whatever you decide to do.
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  #18  
February 11th, 2007, 06:20 PM
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Quote:
I am just so confused...why is when I had a septum and Dh only had 3 million sperm we could get pg no problem...and now, now that everything is suppose to be "fixed", we can't get pg. 3 *$%# eggs, 40 million sperm stuck right there and it didn't work???? Seriously? It feels hopeless.

it's not fair. All I want is one. why is that asking to much of God? Why does he answer some people's [prayers and not ours? What makes other people so worthy or special??? what are we doing that's wrong?[/b]
uuggg it's like you are quoting words straight out of my mouth. This morning when I felt those cramps i was sure they were AF cramps and I just started balling.
Why not me??? What is wrong? I feel like he doesn't hear me, does he know how badly I want a child? How badly i NEED ONE??
Those were my words all morning, I just wanted to give up. And this is all before I have even taken a TEST! can you imagine what a nightmare I would be like to be around after i took it and it was neg. (Lord willing it will be positive though)

I feel like I'm on a constant roller coaster. One minute I am full of pure hope and know it will happen for me... the next I'm screaming, crying, wanting to rip out my hair because I'm so frustrated and scared. I feel like I'm full of such little faith... I think of Job (from the book of Job in the Bible) He went through hell and back, lost everything, sure he was mad, but he trusted God even still and God provided for him....
I don't think it's wrong to be upset, or even to tell God that you are upset and that you are frustrated with what is happening... but for me, i know i need to trust... trust him that he knows better than I do... even though i feel like i'm on a strict time limit, and I need this now, I have to trust that he understands that and he will provide my hearts desire if i just trust him.

I'm so sorry for what you are going through, I just wish i could be there to give you a big hug. you are such a sweet heart and you will be a great mama!!!
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  #19  
February 11th, 2007, 06:41 PM
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Norina ~ I don't know that there is anything we did "wrong" over what the next woman did. For some reason, we are challenged. Apparently God believes we can handle this ttc obstacle course b/c he keeps giving us one after another. I suppose He believes if we are truly strong, we will cross the finish line. Remember hun, it isn't our fault that we are reproductively challenged. We just got dealt the card. Keep your hopes up. Don't let this get the best of you. Don't let it steal your spirit & your dreams. You WILL get this. It is just a matter of time.
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  #20  
February 11th, 2007, 09:45 PM
Rina42308's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Thank you all for your responses...part of me felt like giving up the boards too today...just because I feel like I am the last woman on earth who isn't pg...I am scared everyone will leave me behind...this has happened on other ttc boards...the other girls got pg and I stayed...I felt like such a loser...a baby challenged loser...

But your responses...Melissa, Juls, Astrid, Eva- they are so from the heart. You are all my friends...really my friends who get it. I can't leave. i can't give everything up.

I needed a plan. I bought a book on diet and infertility, and another one for inspiration about a woman's struggle w/infertility. i went to the store and got lots of foods discussed in the book. I located an accupuncturist that specializes in infertility (I have one but pain management is his speciality and i want one who is really into infertility yk?). So tomorrow I will temp and call for a blood test. if it's good news...great...if it's not at least I have some armor.

As for God...i am so mad at Him right now. And He knows it, not just because He's all knowing but because I have literally screamed at Him today. I feel it's better that then shutting Him out as i have done in my past...because w/o Him life is even more miserable.

Melissa my faith is wavering so much. i feel weak. I ask Him for signs at least...like he would do for people all the time in the bible...why would He do that then and not now? I struggle with why He won't at least grant me peace and help me trust Him. I guess it has to come from within...that trust...I don't know how to find it...but I will continue to try.

Sometimes I want to try and resolve that mayeb we can't have a baby...because maybe it would be easier...I can just walk around as a shell of a being until I die. Because I am so so empty w/o a baby. But I want to persevere more than give up...so on to another month...or whatever lies ahead tomorrow at least.

Thank you for listening.

Love to you all,
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