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Forum: Trying to Conceive with Medical Assistance

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  #1  
June 18th, 2007, 05:10 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Colorado
Posts: 1,583
I don't know what to count as CD1. I started AF on 06/02, had a heavy to light flow for 7 days then 3 days of spotting then on CD 12 I started really heavy again for another 4 days, one day of light flow and now spotting. I usually O anytime between CD15 and 17 but this cycle it was all bleeding I was going to buy OPK's but the day I was going to go I started bleeding heavy again, so figured not to waste my money on them.

I am so confused by this cycle I was so happy to finally start and now I don't know what's even going on!!!

I don't know if this is contributing to my hormonal state too You all know about my fight with DH, I thought everything was fine just to find out a few days after he came back home that he had also been calling and texting her He didn't tell me anything about it and the only reason I found out was because I checked our cell phone bill and saw a # I didn't recognize. This brought on another blow up with us, that I'm still trying to get over. I am so wacked out here with emotions I don't know whether I'm coming or going or what. I get on here and I feel so depressed at our situation that I feel like we are going nowhere and we'll never be blessed again. I get these jealousy feelings seeing everyone that can afford or has the option of moving foward in their TTC journey where we are just stuck I get so sad seeing all these BFP's all around me, even IRL that I just want to bawl all the time. Don't get me wrong I am happy for those who are finally getting their dreams but why not me?!?!?! I mean I have even had thoughts here of cheating on him, not because I don't love him but because I just want something he can't give me. But then I feel horrible because we are in this situation because of ME!!! Then I feel even more terrible because of these thoughts and they are not fair to him. I feel like we need counseling, me especially because I am just begining to feel like I just want to give up on everything!!!!

UGH I'm sorry this turned into a "Poor Me" Post But help with what my cycle should be would be great!

TIA
__________________
Raquel Mom to The "A" Team: Anthony, almost 10yrs old (OMG double digits!!!!), Alexis, 8, Aiden, 5
Missing our Angel: Aries Isaiah 09/06/05 Carried you for only 24wks1d but in Mommy's heart FOREVER

To my Aries:
The time we had with you was brief,
We had to say good-bye,
Now angels kiss your little face,
And sing your lullaby.

Someday again, we'll be with you,
To cherish all those things,
Until that day it helps to know,
You're safe in angels wings.





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  #2  
June 18th, 2007, 06:33 PM
*Melissa*'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Oregon
Posts: 4,859
Send a message via MSN to *Melissa*
aw hun, I am so sorry. I had no idea any of this was going on!! I had to go way back and update myself on all your posts... Man, let me tell you though. He should not be doing what he is doing right now. I would be just as angry as you... The thing about a marraige is that you two are ONE now. You have a commitment to eachother, and there is no more, "me" or "mine". The same things goes with "friends" you shouldn't have any friends that are "yours" anymore, they should be "our" friends. There should be NO secrets, you are considered one flesh!! With that being said, If you have any ex's that you keep in contact with, i would greatly suggest saying goodbye and asking him to do the same, that way it isn't a double standard. If this is too hard for him to let go of, then I think it would be a healthy choice to move on to counceling.
When I got married, i had to say goodbye to a lot of my girl friends who were single because all they wanted to do was party and look for guys... and that would NOT be healthy for a married woman. Even though it was hard to do I had to choose my marraige over some friends. Now, we have met a ton of married couples at our church that are OUR friends and we have a BLAST getting together with them.
Also, another solution for the whole "myspace thing"... we have a shared account, so it's called the "Brian and Melissa space" That way, i know who exactly is writing to dh, and he knows who is writing to ME, and no one in there right mind would send inappropriate e-mails if they knew the spouse had access. I don't carry ANY information on my ex's.... I just don't think it's appropriate, and it leaves room for mistakes i don't want to make, and I never want that to happen to my marraige.
I'm glad that you are catching this when you are, because these things have a tendancy of snowballing and getting out of control. I think the two of you should sit down and talk things out without getting emotional or upset. Discuss what is most important to eachother and where eachother see's improvement on your marraige. Listen to what he says and do your best to do it for him. When YOU try hard in the marraige, he is likley to do the same.

I HIGHLY recommend this book "The five love languages" by Gary Chapman. It's for ANY couple whether they have a great relationship already, or they are on the brink of Divorce... it has saved MANY marraiges. My husband and I loved it, and it made our marraige SO much more enjoyable... if you ever want to talk, just pm me and I'm here.

I'll be praying for you!!!
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  #3  
June 19th, 2007, 04:46 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Colorado
Posts: 1,583
Thanks, Melissa, and I will definately look for this book

The whole thing with the ex................I definately do NOT talk to any of mine and he knows this. I told him this was in no way a jealousy issue it was an anger issue with him and her!!! I told him I think I deserve more respect as his wife than what I got from the both of them. He still kept trying to push that they were just friends, but I told him that he didn't know how her marriage was and she might be taking it as more. After chewing that over he finally agreed with me and did e-mail her and told her that their "Friendship" was destroying our marriage and it wasn't worth it to him, he asked her to delete his email address and cell phone # and to never contact him again. He also deleted his myspace account. It in a way made me feel better but then at the same time I still don't know. I told him he still has access to emailing her from work and getting emails from her there where I would NEVER know and she could still call him on his cell or again at work and the same I wouldn't know. He knows that it is going to take me a long time to ever trust him again I just hate having our relationship like this to where I don't trust him I Miss the old "us"
__________________
Raquel Mom to The "A" Team: Anthony, almost 10yrs old (OMG double digits!!!!), Alexis, 8, Aiden, 5
Missing our Angel: Aries Isaiah 09/06/05 Carried you for only 24wks1d but in Mommy's heart FOREVER

To my Aries:
The time we had with you was brief,
We had to say good-bye,
Now angels kiss your little face,
And sing your lullaby.

Someday again, we'll be with you,
To cherish all those things,
Until that day it helps to know,
You're safe in angels wings.





Reply With Quote
  #4  
June 19th, 2007, 05:25 PM
Astrid's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 27,408
Sweetie, I think that reaching out for counseling may be very healthy for both you & DH. Apparently there are some issues that need to be resolved & by getting a 3rd party involved that is unbias in their opinion, it may shed some light on these issues that you would never otherwise see. Hopefully your situation will resolve itself soon. On a personal note, w/ marital issues that you are going through, I would take a ttc break. The added stress is not healthy for your relationship.

As for CD 1, I would count the 1st day of bleeding as the 1st day of your cycle.

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Check out hEvan @ http://www.etsy.com/store/hEvan
for some great handmade items.
All proceeds go to a family struggling w/ infertility!



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  #5  
June 19th, 2007, 05:37 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Colorado
Posts: 1,583
Thanks, Astrid, I think that we won't be trying anything for now

CD 1 as first day of bleeding the first time or second?? LOL
__________________
Raquel Mom to The "A" Team: Anthony, almost 10yrs old (OMG double digits!!!!), Alexis, 8, Aiden, 5
Missing our Angel: Aries Isaiah 09/06/05 Carried you for only 24wks1d but in Mommy's heart FOREVER

To my Aries:
The time we had with you was brief,
We had to say good-bye,
Now angels kiss your little face,
And sing your lullaby.

Someday again, we'll be with you,
To cherish all those things,
Until that day it helps to know,
You're safe in angels wings.





Reply With Quote
  #6  
June 19th, 2007, 06:11 PM
Astrid's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 27,408
1st time...

Try to keep a + attitude as difficult as it may seem. You guys make beautiful children & truly love one another. Stress can either tear a relationship apart or make it stronger. Don't give up. God will know when you guys are fixed & will bless you w/ a baby. Hang on!
__________________
Check out hEvan @ http://www.etsy.com/store/hEvan
for some great handmade items.
All proceeds go to a family struggling w/ infertility!



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  #7  
June 20th, 2007, 09:53 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Colorado
Posts: 1,583
Thanks

Well if I count CD 1 from the first time I bled then we missed me Oing anyway. Oh well!!! Guess its all on hold anyway, I just want my body back to normal!!!!
__________________
Raquel Mom to The "A" Team: Anthony, almost 10yrs old (OMG double digits!!!!), Alexis, 8, Aiden, 5
Missing our Angel: Aries Isaiah 09/06/05 Carried you for only 24wks1d but in Mommy's heart FOREVER

To my Aries:
The time we had with you was brief,
We had to say good-bye,
Now angels kiss your little face,
And sing your lullaby.

Someday again, we'll be with you,
To cherish all those things,
Until that day it helps to know,
You're safe in angels wings.





Reply With Quote
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