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  #1  
April 8th, 2010, 09:25 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 2,757
WHAT HAVE WE DONE??!! By having so many kiddos .

Today is certainly one of those days when I am waiting for nap time. I'm sure I am not alone, but there are just days.....

Especially when we've stripped all the beds in the house 3 times in the last week due to the flu and diarrhea, steam cleaned the carpets countless times, being 34 weeks pg and it's getting tough to do all that and having your DH gone out of town working. Sometimes it just takes a toll. Thankfully our older kids are huge helpers, I don't know what I would do without them.

When the littlest two take their naps this afternoon, the rest of us are grabbing a blanket and going to cuddle on the couch and read away the afternoon. We love that time. There is just something so special about reading outloud with your kids. We try and do it everyday. Makes all the puke so worth it. Okay, I feel better now.


Hope everyone has a great day!
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  #2  
April 8th, 2010, 09:43 AM
Farmers-wife's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I am so sorry. I know how you feel, you are not alone, we all go through this!
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  #3  
April 8th, 2010, 09:46 AM
jhmomofmany's Avatar Look! A Dancing Banana!
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Location: Upper Michigan
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sounds like you have had a rough week. {{hugs}} I definitely have days when I wonder what God was thinking sending us so many children and me so little time/energy/patience... I think part of what makes it so hard to deal with those feelings is that there is nobody a large-family mom can talk to! The likely response from most people is along the lines of "well it's your fault you have so many kids!" I hope you and the older children manage a peaceful afternoon- a few hours' quiet can make such a difference.
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~Jennifer, wife of one, mother of many

Robert: 18 Raechel: 17 Daniel: 14 Joseph: 12 Thomas: 10 Mary Mae: 6 Lucy Marie: 4 and John Anthony, 1!!

Always Missing our Angels: Hope (7-8-06 @36w) and Francis (7-4-12 @12w)


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  #4  
April 8th, 2010, 10:12 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2009
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Ah, thanks ladies, you made me feel so much better! It's good to know other mom's question their sanity once in while too. .

I understand about hearing the line "it's your fault that you have so many kids". That one hurts. I'd love to ask them which one I should give back.

I love being a wife and mommy. It really is my calling and I feel that I do a good job most of the time. Both sets of parents think along the line of two kids is good, so we are way past that. But they don't like to help because it is basically "our fault". I sometimes feel like asking them, so "If you have a job you love and are pretty good at it, why do you need vacation time? You should never need a break. Shouldn't you just forefit it?" I know that sounds mean, but sometimes I get frustrated with the lack of support for big families. Like you said Jennifer, there really is no one else who understands in real life, except those with large families themselves.

I feel so much better, thanks again! I'm off to hold down the couch with the kiddos. We are getting some snow flakes here.....now that's depressing!
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  #5  
April 8th, 2010, 10:27 AM
Farmers-wife's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Snow? Where are you? That is your problem! You need to move to some civilized place that is hot, Africa hot, hell hot, then cold for a brief month.

I completely understand you and if I lived there, after I killed myself, would be over there to help! My large family friends are always the first ones to respond when someone needs something. We really are a different breed.

Make sure that couch doesn't move a bit!
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  #6  
April 8th, 2010, 10:32 AM
UrbanMomma's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
"If you have a job you love and are pretty good at it, why do you need vacation time? You should never need a break. Shouldn't you just forefit it?"
[/QUOTE]

I am going to use this one. LOL.

Get some rest...for me too.
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#12 is on the way
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  #7  
April 8th, 2010, 10:41 AM
~mommy~'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Hope you have a relaxing afternoon, and that everyone is feeling better.
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  #8  
April 8th, 2010, 10:45 AM
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 273
This week has been one of those weeks for me as well. Thankfully nobody has been sick, but we have started potty training this week, no one wants to cooperate with me, morning sickness has kicked it and I just feel stretched to my max right now. We put the older kiddos in public school thinking it would be easier on me and I don't think it has helped at all. Having them home was so much more help for me. We're considering bringing them all back home for next year. Not that any of them would mind much, they loved being here.

I just noticed you are due May 22nd! In my other post I asked when you were due! That's mine and my hubby's wedding anniversary

And I agree, it's hard for large families to have any kind of support system. We've kept this pregnancy a secret from anyone who is going to be extremely negative about us having another baby. Hearing all the pessimistic responses isn't something I'm willing to deal with right now!

Enjoy your rest on the couch! I'm about to go take one myself right now too
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  #9  
April 8th, 2010, 11:06 AM
Platinum Supermommy
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I hope your kids feel better soon that'll help a whole lot
Now I don't have as many kids as you, but I only used to think I had too many when they were sick, anything over 2 seems like too many when they're throwing up.

My brother and his wife just had their 5th (in 8 years like I have) and I had to tell them that hardly anyone cares if you're tired/busy/overwhelmed. Well, maybe a little bit, but not that much, there is always an element of "you did this to yourself". But you know what, when I had my 5th and they only had 2, they were just like that, so I don't think that you really know what it's like unless you live it.

Three cheers for the large family message board.
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  #10  
April 8th, 2010, 02:21 PM
jhmomofmany's Avatar Look! A Dancing Banana!
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snowing today here, too, and after we've been blessed with such an early melt-off! Hopefully the weather will improve quickly, that makes such a difference.
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~Jennifer, wife of one, mother of many

Robert: 18 Raechel: 17 Daniel: 14 Joseph: 12 Thomas: 10 Mary Mae: 6 Lucy Marie: 4 and John Anthony, 1!!

Always Missing our Angels: Hope (7-8-06 @36w) and Francis (7-4-12 @12w)


I've lost 60 pounds, and I'm stronger than ever! No gimmicks, no BS, just exercise, nutrition, and support from the awesome Fitness and Weight Loss board here at JM!! Click the blinkie to join us!



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  #11  
April 8th, 2010, 03:37 PM
Momtothe6thpower's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Smalltown, USA
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I have those days and I only have five. But I feel like I have to be perfect ALL the time. It sometimes feels like I can't ask for help because if I do then I will look like I can't handle all of them. But I'm just stubborn, I also don't want to give any of the "haters" anything to talk about, lol!

Hang in there, Momma!
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  #12  
April 8th, 2010, 04:49 PM
MariaL's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I know the feeling. I hope everyone starts to feel better soon!
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  #13  
April 8th, 2010, 05:03 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 2,757
Thank you all so much! I feel so much better tonight. I'm glad I found this board, this is such a God sent for people with lotsa kiddos. I agree with what you ladies have said. I don't think others understand what it like unless they have been there or are doing that. And if I ever complained to our familes........the first think they would say is "You know how to stop it". So I feel like I can never be honest with them. And it's okay to have a bad day once in a while, everyone does!

Farmers wife, I am in Wisconsin. Yes, way to north!
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  #14  
April 8th, 2010, 05:42 PM
Farmers-wife's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 6,190
It is the same way with homeschooling. You can't ever complain to non hsers. They don't get it, and think it would be so much simpler to send them off to school. So, you can never admit to having a tough time or not wanting to parent anymore. Or if your sister is gay and she knows you don't approve, you can never have a bad day with your husband. It is like we have to put up this facade, even though we don't want to, just to protect ourselves from the worse onslaught we would get if we ever showed weakness. It is sometimes hard to be different. But I wouldn't trade it for anything.
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  #15  
April 8th, 2010, 09:09 PM
Just_Marie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Canada
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I was overwhelmed with one, one year ago-I'm hanging onto the edge by a pinky most days now.
I honestly know of nobody IRL with 4 kids under 4-the only people I have who understand or care is this board. And dh, but he gets to work 70 hours a week...

And today's been a good day, lol!
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  #16  
April 9th, 2010, 09:24 AM
tcmcmd's Avatar Veteran
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Posts: 247
I definitely understand feeling like nobody has sympathy for you because "you did this to yourself". I feel like I can't complain a single pregnancy complaint because this is my 5th. I'm even feeling guilty for taking maternity leave for the 5th time in 8 years. Luckily, my mother-in-law had 7 kids, so she is sympathetic. She is much tougher than me though, so I think she thinks I whine about more than I should. Regardless of what others think....it is TOTALLY worth it. I LOVE my kiddos!
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  #17  
April 9th, 2010, 10:25 AM
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Location: Andrews AFB, MD
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I have been feeling like that at times lately, but not so much because of the kids. We've just had a lot of bills lately, one right after the other, and I am really starting to wonder if we can afford all these kids. But then it seems like my friends with just one or two kids seem to have the same money struggles, so I guess it is all relative.
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