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my dh is unreasonable sometimes


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  #1  
April 12th, 2010, 08:36 AM
shari626's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Delaware
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My dh can be so pigheaded sometimes.

We have two outside only cats and when my neighbor moved (in August) she left her kitty (one of our outside cat's kittens) to stay with the other two. All the cats always went between our house and hers (she had a cat door in her garage and they lounged on my patio) Since she has moved, we have assumed responsibility for all of them. The little kitten one was an indoor outdoor cat, and when the weather got cold we let her in our house. Dh argued (he hates cats) but we guilted him into letting the cat stay inside during the night. Since it is getting warmer, we still let the cat in at night and she goes out every morning. (We have no inside litterbox, and the cat will cry at the door if she needs to go out) She is very sweet, and loves the kids and they love her. She is afraid of dh and steers clear of him at all costs.

Last night dh called from work. (He is on the night shift) He heard the cat meow (she's very vocal) and started freaking out about it being inside and now that it's not winter ~ we are not to let it in anymore. If I don't let the cat in, she goes around to each window in our house and meows until she finds us and we let her in. I guess he expects me to ignore her. I told him that she doesn't bother him, and what's the big deal. He simply said that he doesn't like cats and that's that. Don't let her in again. (I hung up at this point. I don't appreciate being talked to like I am the child)

This cat is soooo sweet, lovable, clean, she's pure white with a fluffy tail, and I have been keeping frontline flea stuff on her so she doesn't bring in fleas. Our dog gets along with all the cats and they all like her.

Why is he so unreasonable??? This cat is not a strictly outdoor cat like the other two and isn't used to spending all night outside. To my elderly neighbor, it was her baby but she couldn't take her to her new apartment. We all loved the cat - except dh.

Am I wrong to want to argue this further or should I just let it go and not let the cat in again?
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  #2  
April 12th, 2010, 08:40 AM
Farmers-wife's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Let it go and not let the cat in again. I hate cats. We have 5 and they ARE NOT ALLOWED IN, but they are always in. So, for me, keep it out! Since I can't seem to manage my own house, I will live vicariously through yours.
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  #3  
April 12th, 2010, 08:50 AM
Momtothe6thpower's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Does he have any other valid reason other than he doesn't like them? Does he have allergies that are bothered by the cat? Cat hair on his clothes? Is he just scared of her? j/k

If he can't come up w/ a better reason than I don't like cats, then I think I might hold a family vote on that one. Dh and I aren't cat people but my oldest daughter is and we have learned to like her cat (and only her cat!). Likewise, my daughter doesn't care for dogs but she has learned to like our dogs. However, all animals are outside now due to a sudden developement of allergies.
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  #4  
April 12th, 2010, 09:13 AM
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I'd be taking it further just for the pure fact of the way he TOLD you what was going to happen and what you were going to do. If he's the only one who doesn't like the cat and doesn't have any responsibilities toward the cat and the cat leaves him alone anyway then I'd say he's outvoted unless he has allergies with cats or something like that. Nothing good at all would come out of my dh talking to me that way and he knows it.
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  #5  
April 12th, 2010, 09:48 AM
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I would leave it outside, and I'm a cat lover. I am not a dog lover (or even liker) and would be upset if my DH kept bringing in a dog if I asked him not to.
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  #6  
April 12th, 2010, 10:14 AM
shari626's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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No, my dh is not allergic at all. He has no valid reason except he doesn't like it.

The thing that I don't get is he doesn't even see the cat. We are asleep when the cat is in, and she won't come in any room that he is in. She usually curls up and goes to sleep with one of the kids. When I get up ~ she goes back outside.

No hair on his clothes, the cat doesn't come in our room, and she doesn't scratch stuff. She's a very good cat.

FWIW I am not a cat person either. But I don't mind her ~ she doesn't bother me at all. I am, however, an animal person ~ and I can't ignore her outside.

I guess the majority of you think I should just leave it outside. It guess I am the unreasonable one.
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  #7  
April 12th, 2010, 11:21 AM
UrbanMomma's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Heck if I know...I just wanted to say again...somedays I love being single.
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  #8  
April 12th, 2010, 11:22 AM
KrazE's Avatar ShutTheFrontDoor
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I don't think it's the feeling bad about the cat issue to be honest, though it's tough not to, but it's more that the animal that was inappropriately abandoned to you is causing an issue in the family.
I can see your point as well, but when it's causing the issue that it is, the cat either needs to remain outside, or go to the shelter.
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  #9  
April 12th, 2010, 02:14 PM
kassia's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Honestly, I would tell my DH to kiss my butt and let the cat in. If the cat makes you and the kids happy he should cope. I am not a dog person at all but my husband and kids wanted a dog so we got a dog.
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