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  #1  
April 21st, 2010, 12:21 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Southeastern South Dakota
Posts: 4,389
How do you get your children to listen to you?

Let me give you a couple examples:

1. I told my daughter to put her library book in her bookbag so that she wouldn't have to worry about forgetting it again this week. She put it on the chest by the steps and said she'd put it in her bag in the morning. At the time, I was ok with that because I didn't have my smart cap on and we were in a busy moment at the time...
The next day, I found the book on top of the television (where I believe my DH put it after one of the other kids was carrying it around the house the next morning - after DD already left for school).
I told her again to get it off the television and put it in her backpack. She said "Got It!" and off she went. When I got home this morning, guess what I found on top of the television?! YUP! her library book which was due last Wednesday!

2. I asked my DD #2 today to go into my bedroom and get the baby's bottle my DH had set up in the window. When she came back into the kitchen empty handed, I asked her where the bottle was. She just shrugged her shoulders. I dropped what I was doing with lunch and went to my bedroom to find the television shut off (which was on prior to me sending her there) and the bottle still in the window. Soooo...she shut off the tv and came out of the room.

My thought is that my children get too distracted when they are off to follow my direction. How do I get them to focus at the task at hand. I feel like these 2 examples are just snippets of what occurs on a daily basis in our home. they don't listen. I can't get them to do what I say. they lose things easily. they leave things laying around all the time. My world feels extremely chaotic, messy, and I often (especially right now) feel like I want to pull out my hair and scream or maybe scream and then pull out my hair. lol either way would probably work for me lol

any help and advice?! tia!
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  #2  
April 21st, 2010, 12:59 PM
Momtothe6thpower's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Smalltown, USA
Posts: 7,334
Sometimes I have to be very adamant about asking them to do things. If they know that I'm watching and keeping track of what they are doing, then they will do it. If they see that I am distracted w/ other things (which has been the case lately) they will slack off.
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  #3  
April 21st, 2010, 02:17 PM
KrazE's Avatar ShutTheFrontDoor
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,546
Wait... there are actually kids who listen to their parents??!!!

I'll have to make a notation of that
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  #4  
April 21st, 2010, 02:19 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Southeastern South Dakota
Posts: 4,389
If you're going to watch them do it, what stops you from just doing it yourself then? I know we need them to do things so that they learn responsibility but my "very patient" characteristic is starting to fade in this category lol
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  #5  
April 21st, 2010, 02:41 PM
Momtothe6thpower's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Smalltown, USA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Julie_aka_Mommy View Post
If you're going to watch them do it, what stops you from just doing it yourself then? I know we need them to do things so that they learn responsibility but my "very patient" characteristic is starting to fade in this category lol
I've asked myself that several times while sitting there watching them pick up the toys in their room . But then I remember how my own mother would do everything herself because she didn't want me to "mess it up" (Not do it her way in other words). I don't want to end up in the same boat.
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  #6  
April 21st, 2010, 05:59 PM
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Andrews AFB, MD
Posts: 15,492
I have the same thoughts...."Why do I bother staying on them about this when I can just do it myself?" But they do improve over time, and if you don't stick with it now they will never learn to do things for themselves. My MIL laid out my dh's sock and shoes for him before school till he graduated - no thanks!

My kids are a little younger (5 and 4) but they have the same issues...forgetting the same things over and over. They know they have to clear the table when they are done eating, yet everyday I call them back to do that. Then they go wash their hands but never their faces. It's a work in progress, but I have better luck if I stop what I am doing, look them in the eye, and make my request. Then follow through!
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  #7  
April 22nd, 2010, 06:37 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,741
You could be writing this about my boys!! They are younger.. Noah's going to be 4 on may 1st and Nicky is going to be 3 in September, but even the littlest things they completely ignore me.. or it seems that way anyway. This morning I had to get the boys' shoes on them to take Noah to preschool.. I told Nicky to sit on the couch while I got his shoes.. he did every but sit on the couch and I still had to call him 3 more times over to the couch before he came. If I send them into another room to get something, you might as well forget it because they see a whole bunch of other things they'd rather get or mess with than what I sent them for!
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  #8  
April 22nd, 2010, 06:43 AM
UrbanMomma's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Somewhere near Detroit, MI
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Cortney...I have to stop myself from doing that too. I almost have to bite my tongue sometimes to stop myself from saying "Okay, just stop, I'll do it myself!!"

As far as OG post...When they are younger you pretty much have two choices, IMO, watch them do it, or check that they did it say 10 minutes after you told them to do it. It does get somewhat better when they get older, then they turn into teenagers who lose their hearing and ability to do anything but text.
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