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  #1  
January 12th, 2011, 04:05 PM
Momtothe6thpower's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Always want to have a larege family?

If not, was there a turning point where he decided "the more the better"?

Tell us his story!
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  #2  
January 12th, 2011, 04:45 PM
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Dh knew he didn't want 3 kids (he's the middle of 3) so he wanted 4, and I wanted 4 or 5 and he was ok with that.

The more the better is not the case in this house, we're both really happy with 5.
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  #3  
January 12th, 2011, 05:07 PM
Just_Marie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I think we each always wanted two, then we had four, and we agreed that 5-6 would be great!
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  #4  
January 12th, 2011, 05:21 PM
erjo's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 354
When my husband and I started dating he wanted I think 8 kids. And I told him NO WAY, it was NEVER going to happen, so if he really wanted to date me with the intent of marriage he would have to make up his mind then that 2 or MAYBE 3 were enough.

Well, apparently my womanly charms were enough to ensnare him LOL. After we had the boys I said I was done. He kept saying he might want another one but I was DONE. Then we accidentally got pregnant, and he was so happy. We lost that baby at 15 weeks and it was devastating-- maybe moreso for him than for me, although I was in bad shape. I had really JUST come around to the idea of being pregnant again and was starting to feel the baby move, and then he just died in my womb.

It took me a few months but I decided I wanted to try again for a third, which we did. And I think we both intended to be done with three, but I started getting the ache in my ovaries again . . . you know what I mean . . . and he agreed this fall to try for one more.

After this? I don't know. Pregnancy is very hard on me, harder the older I get. I think if I could just pop out babies with no problem my husband and I might actually go for that eight he had in mind at first. As it is, four might be it. Although I would love to adopt someday. So maybe this will be our last "biological" child, but I'd like to think there will be more little ones in this house.

I guess we'll see.

And yeah. That's not really my husband's story as much as mine, is it? LOL
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  #5  
January 12th, 2011, 05:57 PM
Mom to 8 amazing kids
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My husband only wanted 1-2 but more because he knew I wanted at least 5. I have no clue when the change happened but before I knew it he was the one wanting more. I am done though, 8 is enough for me however I think he would keep going if I would.
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  #6  
January 12th, 2011, 08:08 PM
Alison79's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Texas
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When we were first together he would joke he wanted 12 and I said I would go half and have 6 We are very happy with our family size and both knew we were done when I got pregnant with Max.
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  #7  
January 12th, 2011, 11:02 PM
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My dh really only wanted 2. I always wanted 4 but thought I'd be ok with 2. After number 2, I knew I wasn't done so he agreed to have 3. After number 3 I said I still wanted another and he (after lots of convincing) has agreed to 4. Now we are just waiting to see if we are going to be blessed with number 4.
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  #8  
January 13th, 2011, 07:59 AM
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We both knew we wanted kids but didn't have the # discussion until AFTER we were married

I figured he'd only want 2 so when I told him I wanted at least 3 he said "is that all?" LOL

After we had 2 he did say we were done for a while but later changed his mind and he agreed on 4.
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  #9  
January 13th, 2011, 02:06 PM
ImustBeNuts06's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I don't think we ever agreed on a set number prior to marriage. I already had a DD from a previous relationship and we got married when I was pregnant with our first child together. So we started out our marriage with two kids. I always felt like 4 would be a good number, and he never argued against it. We were content and done at 4, but now with 5....we are REALLY done. I still would love to foster/adopt someday, but I don't know how keen he is on the idea now that we have 5 biological kids. Although, if in a couple years, I'm still really wanting to foster/adopt, I'm sure he would go for it.
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  #10  
January 13th, 2011, 04:20 PM
babydahl's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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We both always wanted at least 4. He came from a family of 4 kids but they're very spread out in age. He always loved when everyone got together for holidays etc.. and had great memories of that growing up.
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  #11  
January 14th, 2011, 01:38 AM
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Hubby wanted 2 and I wanted 3. I pushed for 3 and begrudgingly got my way. 4 was... a huge surprise, so we are definitely done.
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  #12  
January 14th, 2011, 07:50 AM
Just_Marie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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dh was an only child, he begged his parents for years for a sibling, but it didn't work---we both knew we couldn't only have one
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  #13  
January 14th, 2011, 08:10 AM
kassia's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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My dh wanted kids but he wanted TWO and no more. His ideal was a boy and a girl then we would be done. I was on board with his plan but when the first two were girls we decided to try one more time to see if we could get "our boy" and we had Gabriel. Then after Gabe was born I KNEW we needed to have more children and we were not complete as a family. He on the other hand wasn't so sure but I guess God agreed with me because we had two more.
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  #14  
January 14th, 2011, 10:39 AM
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We never officially agreed on a number. After baby #4 I felt done. Dh didn't but because of how I felt he never told me that he wanted more. Baby #5 was a huge surprise and he was/is much more excited than I am but he says he feels done now too. So we are in agreement that 5 is it!
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  #15  
January 14th, 2011, 12:20 PM
Mommyx12's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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We had agreed on having 3, then we had our 2nd and dh was satisfied. If we had another fine, if not fine, but he didn't want to try for another. I really wanted to have a 3rd and had prayed for God to put us on the same page, to take my desire away or to give dh the desire to have another. I then started to think that how many children we had should be determined by God but didn't say anything to dh about it because I knew if I convinced him then we might end up with 10 kids and I knew I wanted 3 but not sure about a bunch more. But I prayed and left dh alone about it and then one day he told me he had been feeling we should let God give us how many kids He wanted us to have, I admitted I had been feeling the same thing. We were definitely on the same page! And we had our 10th baby in Dec, lol!! But now dh, is thinking we should be done so we'll see how this works out. I can see his point and understand his reasons and have a few of my own but I'm having a hard time taking this decision back. We'll see what happens. Guess its time to really pray about it again.
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  #16  
January 14th, 2011, 06:12 PM
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Dh wanted two but then we talked about a third because he really wanted a boy so we decided to ttc. Number 4 was a surprise....dh is done but I'm not sure I am hehe so we shall see
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  #17  
January 15th, 2011, 10:33 PM
ShawnaCAN's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I always thought 5 was a nice number, and DH always said he wanted 10. He has only one sister and there were so many times growing up that he wished he had more siblings, especially brothers.

We have 5, TTA for now but open to discussing more.
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  #18  
January 16th, 2011, 12:20 PM
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Ever since I was little I wanted a big family, Id LOVE 8 kids, well i met SO and he was having issues with his ex and not being able to see his son. We had our how many kids do you want on our second official date. He was happy with his son and my daughter, so 2 and he was done. I said ok... I was hoping to atleast have one of our own. He said no way.
I prayed. I prayed really hard, because I wasnt sure I wanted to get into a relationship with a person who didnt want anymore kids, since I wanted a big family. We talked about it. He said it was because he is one of 6 in his family and they always had nothing. He didnt want his family growing up like that.
Well time went by and we got pregnant. He was excited and said ok one together and we are done. We m/c'd... we have m/c'd 6times together. And we are now looking at adoption. Because to my surprise SO wants 5kids...that means we have 2more to go .
I asked him the other day as we were looking at adoption profiles, are you sure you just want 2 more and he said, maybe we werent meant to have anymore of our own, maybe we are meant to help other kids who need families. We will see but we probably wont just stop at 2 more.
Im super excited
Last night he calls and says... look for a house with more room. LOL
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  #19  
January 16th, 2011, 07:57 PM
8miraclez's Avatar Formerly Halfbaked
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We never had a set number. Most of our kids were really decided for us. Only 2 of our kids were planned. This baby was planned but only after I had a mc and DH saw how upset I was. We kind of go baby by baby. After this one, we'll have to see how we are doing financially and physically. Ideally, I would love 8 kids so as long as we both decide not to do anything permanent, there is always that chance.
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  #20  
January 16th, 2011, 10:14 PM
Mega Super Mommy
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When we had the discussion before we got married, we both said we wanted 4. After Aly (#3) was born, given how hard on me pregnancy was with all 3 of them, we decided we were done. And as soon as we decided to be done at 3, even though it was a decision we both made, pp depression set in on me.. I worked my way through it and figured out that the thought of not having that baby #4 wasn't sitting well with me at all and that that was a huge part of the depression. I told DH how I was feeling about wanting another baby down the road and he agreed that #4 would be a good idea... now we have 4 and both of us feel good about being done!
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