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told not to have more kids


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  #1  
January 17th, 2011, 04:10 PM
SnowAngel's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Upper Michigan
Posts: 1,287
I was told today that I didn't need anymore children by my mother. That I was to old and that if I did something would be wrong with the baby. Why should I chance it.

I am 38 going to be 39. I know I am old but wow. She doesn't understand. The chances are 1 in I think 149 (would have to double check what that one test came back as with the last baby.)

Can I just say I am hurt beyond belief.
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  #2  
January 17th, 2011, 04:21 PM
Farmers-wife's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 6,227
I am sorry. It is hurtful. Only you and your husband can decide whether to have more kids. You aren't too old, either. I hope you can let her comments roll off you and not let them fester in your heart.
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  #3  
January 17th, 2011, 05:02 PM
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Posts: 8,308
I'm sorry too
I think only you can decide when you think you're too old (I think I am too old lol) but my mom was 40 and did not have one more due to health reasons, but always said she would have loved another baby at 41 or 42.
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  #4  
January 17th, 2011, 05:34 PM
Mom to 8 amazing kids
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Melba, Idaho
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My MIL said the same thing to me yesterday at my birthday dinner she threw for me LOL. I wasn't hurt though, probably cause I am done and don't want anymore. I agree though, your body, your choice. She can have an opinion but it's not one you have to listen to or follow.
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  #5  
January 17th, 2011, 05:37 PM
~mommy~'s Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I'm sorry she said that, it wasn't very nice.
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  #6  
January 17th, 2011, 06:28 PM
Indymommy7's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: Indiana
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Oh that makes my blood boil.

I think what's even worse though (not to hijack your thread here) are those that keep having them, all the while you're TTC with no luck, who tell you you're "just not meant for more".

It comes in all forms. All very obnoxious.
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Last edited by Indymommy7; January 17th, 2011 at 06:32 PM.
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  #7  
January 17th, 2011, 08:11 PM
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Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 930
i know how you feel!!... my SO and i are TTC one of our own together, and my mom tells me i dont need anymore, i need to "keep my legs closed". Yes I have three, but ive only given birth to one. We want to expand our family. That is our buisness!
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  #8  
January 17th, 2011, 09:41 PM
Just_Marie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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((hugs))
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  #9  
January 18th, 2011, 05:55 AM
babydahl's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Posts: 13,871
What a terrible thing to say!!
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  #10  
January 18th, 2011, 08:26 PM
SnowAngel's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Upper Michigan
Posts: 1,287
Dh and I talked about it. She just doesn't get and we will still do what we want regardless.
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  #11  
January 18th, 2011, 09:06 PM
palmetto_moon's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 4,657
both of our families comment so frequently on how they hope we won't have more that we have just started telling them we are done, even though in a couple years we'll probably have one or two more. It's just not worth hearing all their yacking..and really it's our private business. But its sooooo annoying to hear them.
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  #12  
January 19th, 2011, 12:08 PM
foxfire_ga79
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It never fails to astound me how people are willing to tell other women what to do with their fertility. My mom is a nagger too. For a while DH and I were kicking around TTC#5 later this year and my mom pestered me about it all. the. time. (We've since decided that 4 is plenty for us for other reasons, not her nagging.) I would just tell her that it wasn't up for discussion with her.
I'm sorry you're hurt over this. Maybe try and think up a few one liners to put other people in their place when they try and tell you how big YOUR family should be.
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  #13  
January 19th, 2011, 12:24 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2010
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So so sorry you're having to deal with that from your own mother! We have plenty of family member who tell us DH needs to get a vesectemy or ask if DH has gotten a vesectemy yet... I find that VERY offensive and intrusive.
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