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we have it made in this department, both sets are very much in agreement with how we raise our kids, and we visit, they come to school programs (except my dad, he's a stick in the mud for those things), birthday parties, look over report cards and the kids have occasional sleepovers and they sometimes babysat the kids, mil would actually ask to have them over when they were little.
I guess for me grandparents should be just that, a fun supportive role, and thankfully both sets hold the same values that we do.
I can't think of what kind of grandparent I will be, if I think that I had my first at 21, that will be my oldest is 8 years, and that would make me 42. YIKES!!!!
My parents are gone, but my sibs and my IL's both understand that as the parents who are with our kids 98% of the time, we get to make the rules, and they get to support us. Of course if we're doing something they think is dangerous or harmful, they are free to let us know, but they're happy with following the rules instead of making up new ones. I remember my FIL feeding my 2 month old mashed potatoes once, that never happened again. But overall they know their place and I know mine.
My parents are gone and my ILs are over 5 hours away so daily involvement is no longer an issue. My mom rarely stepped over any personal boundaries I had anyway.
I think I will be a very annoying grandmother lol I can picture myself being VERY opinionated, and am already trying to tell myself I better not be like that. And going with what #5 said i was pregnant at 19 so if my oldest followed in my footsteps (hoping that's a no) that would only give me 7 years, I would be 39 :0
I think I will be a very annoying grandmother lol I can picture myself being VERY opinionated, and am already trying to tell myself I better not be like that.
LOL! Same here. I want to be one of those super involved grandparents but I'm afraid of irritating my kids and their spouses.
My mom is very involved and sometimes crosses boundaries. She was awful when I was younger but has mellowed out some now. She still doesn't follow my rules when the kids are at her house and that bugs me ALOT!
My dad and Dh's mom don't know our kids at all. Dh's Dad is involved just enough that it's about right. He gets along with the kids, visits and even babysits when needed and never forms an opinion on our parenting abilities, lol!
C...mom to A, C, E, L, I, and R
I don't think grandparents should be involved in the parenting. My husband and I are the parents...period. What we say goes. Mine and his parents are supportive and informed but they don't help raise our children. I should mention we live 9 hours from the closest set of grandparents, so they are not a part of our day-to-day activities.