Strange responses to your family

Repti.Mom · #1 February 3rd, 2012, 06:31 AM

So I am aware of all the "you DO know what causes that...?" types of things, but have you ever had someone say something that you really didn't know how to respond?

One of the insulation guys yesterday morning (they actually got here before the kids left for school for once!) Looks at all the kids and says "good for you!" to me.. Good for me what? That I am in the sac a lot? That I kept all the kids? That I don't use birth control 'good enough' LOL? I just was at a loss for words.

~mommy~ · #2 February 3rd, 2012, 06:53 AM

I've heard that one. What it meant was they were happy to see a large family in today's society of 2-3dc.

starsandstripes · #3 February 3rd, 2012, 06:55 AM

LOL! yes I have been there.....and I get "good for you" a lot too, but mostly it's when someone walks by a table when we are all out to eat because it's usually followed by "they are all so well behaved" so I think it's more of like "oh they are so well behaved, good for you". I guess when you have 8 you expect them to be jumping off the walls like monkeys?? I don't know. Sometimes people should just say nothing.

I did have a guy one time ask me though "how we feed them all". Oddly enough that was at a restaurant too, AND I only had 6 back then. How about like anyone else....and I don't even have time for couponing! Geez. My husband absolutely HATES the "you do know how this happens right" comment....he HATES that one. lol.

Farmers-wife · #4 February 3rd, 2012, 07:13 AM

I think "good for you" is a general well wishing, congrats type comment. I say thanks to that.

The one time I was left speechless was not about family size. I was struggling with #7 not nursing and I was still very sensitive about it. I was still embarrassed to be using a bottle and formula. So one day we were waiting for pizza at the local pizza place and feeding the baby. This older couple were commenting on how cute, etc and I started in on her not nursing and not know what was wrong or what to do. The old man, seriously, over 70, says "has her father shown her how?"

I was struck silent, then busted out laughing when I realized what he said. I still haven't come up with a good retort!

Repti.Mom · #5 February 3rd, 2012, 07:17 AM

I LOVE old people. They are generally the ones that (even if your kids are all rolling on the floor and stealing apples at the grocery store) pull you over and tell you about their 13 siblings and how much they love their life.

starsandstripes · #6 February 4th, 2012, 07:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Repti.Mom

I LOVE old people. They are generally the ones that (even if your kids are all rolling on the floor and stealing apples at the grocery store) pull you over and tell you about their 13 siblings and how much they love their life.

It's ALWAYS the old people! Young people these days that say the things they say have NO idea how great having a big family is. I feel sorry for them actually.

.....I should clarify. I feel sorry for them, not because I feel like THEY are missing out, but because they don't know what they are talking about before they comment

cnote · #7 February 4th, 2012, 07:14 PM

A guy at a grocery store register once told me that I must be in heat. I honestly did not know what to say.

sarahlorrain · #8 February 5th, 2012, 05:08 PM

OMG I LOVE the old people!!! One day there was little old man riding in one of those electric carts. He had his oxygen thing and the tubes and all and he drives by really slowly smiling and looking at my kids. He said "Beautiful, you're family is beautiful." You could just tell he was thinking of the days when his kids were little!

I haven't really had anyone say anything that I didn't know what to say back. I am so sick of the "Don't you know what causes that." So old!!! Last pregnancy, I just smiled, and said "My husband!"

MarieJ · #9 February 7th, 2012, 07:58 PM

I think he meant, wow lady you're hot after having so many kids!

MamaJessie · #10 February 8th, 2012, 05:16 AM

I've got "good for you" before too and agree with others that I think of it is a congrats on a larger family.

UrbanMomma · #11 February 8th, 2012, 06:34 AM

The "dont you know what causes that" is such a stupid comment. We all seem to get the same comments over and over....I wonder if there is a message board somewhere for people who like to make stupid comments, so they can all share their ideas. Must not be a very bright or imaginative bunch of folks.

CBTECH · #12 February 8th, 2012, 11:22 AM

I don't mind the mix of comments so much as the snide under the breath remarks that some people make. They think we don't hear them but if they really want to say something, just do it. Most of the time they don't know the circumstances surrounding our family before making those remarks, so I just let them think what they want. I've had a couple of people stop me and genuinely ask me why we chose to have so many, and that's when I tell them and I can almost see them change their opinion & thought the second they hear it.

But I agree...I'm tired of hearing the same old "do you know what causes it" question/speech.

sarahlorrain · #13 February 8th, 2012, 03:32 PM

Oh, I almost forgot a good comment I've come up with. Nobody has managed to disagree with me yet. When they ask why I have so many kids (and I only have 4 so far!) is this:

Well, there are so many idiots on the planet these days, I figure someone needs to raise some well-educated humans who have their heads screwed on straight."

Usually their response is something along these lines....

".........................................I guess you have a point there........................"

Halfbaked · #14 February 8th, 2012, 11:30 PM

I love when I get comments like "good for you" or "God bless you". It's usually older people but once a young waitress told me "good for you" then followed it with "we have 16 kids in our family". I didn't really know what to say.

My brother, who has 10 kids, taught me what to say when people give the "you do know what causes that" remark. He just says "yes, and apparantly I like it". That usually shuts them up real quick.

anexia · #15 February 20th, 2012, 08:11 PM

Mostly I think people are just looking for something to say so I forgive their carelessness. but I did have one that I wanted to respond to as crudely as it was said. A man was cooing over my babies and telling me he had 6 kids with the youngest being twins I comment on the coincidence that so did I. The guy next to us overheard and responded
"God! I hope your husband had a vasectomy!"

I really wanted to ask him what bussiness was it of his what my husband did with his genitals? Next time I will. EEK!

anexia · #16 February 20th, 2012, 08:11 PM

Mostly I think people are just looking for something to say so I forgive their carelessness. but I did have one that I wanted to respond to as crudely as it was said. A man was cooing over my babies and telling me he had 6 kids with the youngest being twins I comment on the coincidence that so did I. The guy next to us overheard and responded
"God! I hope your husband had a vasectomy!"

I really wanted to ask him what bussiness was it of his what my husband did with his genitals? Next time I will.

sarahlorrain · #17 February 21st, 2012, 06:17 AM

OMG!!! How rude and inconsiderate!!!

troopmomz · #18 February 29th, 2012, 12:01 PM

New to these boards, but had to share my experience. I am a mom of four which I don't think is that many kids but I can say there are times when me and my husband are out and about with all our kids and I feel like people are looking at us like we are all from another planet. People don't hesitate to ask if "we are done" and when I was expecting our fourth child, people that we don't even know that well asked if the pregnancy was planned

sarahmomma · #19 March 1st, 2012, 01:13 PM

I get a lot of "Are you done now that you have your girl?" As if it is okay that I have a large family because I must have been trying for a girl and not just adding to my family because I love all of my children and wanted more. I think my favorite is when a person realizes they are all mine and tries to do the math as to how I could possibly have a 7 year old because I look like I am 20 although I am actually almost 27.

ETA: Oh and I have been asked more than once by a stranger if they all have the same Dad. I used to be offended because that is just such a rude question to ask a stranger but now I answer with "Yep and the same Mom too, imagine that" lol

MommySiobhan · #20 March 6th, 2012, 09:05 AM

Funny.
I had a girl checking me out for groceries if they all had the same daddy.
I was stumped. I just said 'Um, yeah'.
It really through me through a loop. Did she really just ask me that? LOL sheesh.

I love the old people too. They are usually the super sweet ones.
I did have one old lady shake her head at me in Meijer once when my then 1 1/2 year old was having a tantrum. I was handling it just fine. I suppose she was one of the old ladies whos baby never cried