Log In Sign Up

New Ideas in Parenting?


Forum: Large Families

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Like Tree2Likes
  • 2 Post By #5in2005

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Large Families LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
June 17th, 2012, 07:38 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 2,204
I know many of us here have been at this mom business for a long time and we have seen different 'recommendations' from the medical community and such. How has your mothering evolved over the years? Have you adapted new ideas as they are become popular?

I know from being in various DDC over the years, I have seen different ideas crop up. One being "tummy time" - which I really don't understand. Some of the mama's are even saying that their peds recommend certain amounts at different ages. Granted, I don't take my children in for well checks and the like, but my ped, who is a very popular one in our area, has never brought this up to me. I have 11 kids so far that are thriving, despite never having regular 'tummy time'.

When I had my first almost 18 years ago, I was told never to leave him on his back to sleep - evidently that has changed too!

Sometimes I think all of these recommendations, rules, and regulations complicate motherhood and undermine a mothers own intuition.

Have you incorporated many (or any) of these types of things or have you 'stayed the course".
__________________
~Lisa, homebirthing, homeschooling , homesteading mama. Married to my beloved for 19 years, raising a big brood of children on a little farm in Southern Michigan.

Mama to:
Nick, 18
Abby, 16
Gabe, 14
Isaac, 12
Mary-Kate, 11
Sam, 9
Henry, 8
Molly, 7
Mark, 5
Greta, 4
Cecilia,2
Josephine,1
Baby due Jan. 2014
Reply With Quote
  #2  
June 17th, 2012, 08:11 AM
Mom to 8 amazing kids
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Melba, Idaho
Posts: 2,607
I think about this on occasion also. My oldest is 21 in a few days and the youngest is 2, so things have changed a lot since the oldest was born. I have never made a parenting choice without looking into research, both sides of the coin. While most of my parenting hasn't changed, like; co-sleeping and no CIO. There are other area's that I have adjusted.

My older had infant cereal, my younger never had. My older ate solids around 4-5 months, the younger have waited till 6 months and sometimes longer. The older slept on their tummies, the younger didn't (I think it was more their choice then anything).

I always find it funny when I hear a first time mom complain that someone touched their infant in the grocery store or family dared to come over and see the baby and *gasp* wanted to hold them. Then I remember being the same way, and know the reason I more laxed with it is because I am older and I realize it's not going to kill them lol
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #3  
June 17th, 2012, 09:50 AM
Babymakes8's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 1,249
^^ what she said.

With my first, I was paranoid over every little thing. Barely let her get dirty, and made sure we hit every well visit, vaccines, etc. Sorta was the same way with #2 except I delayed vax until 15 months. Number 3, the same.

Then with number 4 I started changing things a bit - we were getting more into the homesteading/natural ways of doing things. I stopped getting vaccines for my kids when number 4 was 18 months or 2, and my youngest 2 have not ever been vaccinated.

Not vaccinating is probably the biggest change we've made.
__________________


Reply With Quote
  #4  
June 17th, 2012, 10:01 AM
Repti.Mom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 15,631
Vaccines aren't a big deal to me, I do most of our appointments on time, if I skip any it's because I don't like the doctor not because I don't believe in what's being done.

I really haven't changed things that much except for breastfeeding the last few, and switching to cloth diapers. Again those reasons aren't to fight the man, or make a statement, it's because cloth costs less and BM is free!
The biggest thing for me is giving birth. I learned over time that I don't have to be bullied into doing what I don't want.
__________________







Reply With Quote
  #5  
June 17th, 2012, 10:33 AM
UrbanMomma's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Somewhere near Detroit, MI
Posts: 8,874
Send a message via Yahoo to UrbanMomma
Well, I have always fed my babies when they are ready not by some magic number of weeks/months.

Tummy time is when they can roll themselves onto it.

My babies sleep however they are most comfy and I get the most sleep. I have co-slept with them all, and then if they are comfortable on their tummies or backs, thats how they sleep afterwards.

I don't do well child checks anymore, I don't vaccinate anymore either and I swear the ones who haven't been vax'ed have been healthier.

I don't cloth diaper or breastfeed because I don't want to.

I use a sling now, didn't with the first three though.

I don't let random people touch my infants, but you all haven't seen the random people that live around me.
__________________
Jenifer....The Queen Bee
#12 is on the way
Reply With Quote
  #6  
June 17th, 2012, 10:35 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 2,204
Repti - I'm not talking about making statements or 'fighting the man' - I'm just asking how the latest fads and phases have influenced those of us that have seen them change over time.
__________________
~Lisa, homebirthing, homeschooling , homesteading mama. Married to my beloved for 19 years, raising a big brood of children on a little farm in Southern Michigan.

Mama to:
Nick, 18
Abby, 16
Gabe, 14
Isaac, 12
Mary-Kate, 11
Sam, 9
Henry, 8
Molly, 7
Mark, 5
Greta, 4
Cecilia,2
Josephine,1
Baby due Jan. 2014
Reply With Quote
  #7  
June 17th, 2012, 12:10 PM
Repti.Mom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 15,631
Oh no I know you didn't mean that as the original question. You have to admit though breastfeeding has become a fad, you see it more for shocker value than you actually see the people who breastfeed in the privacy of their own home and never once have a conversation about it.
__________________







Reply With Quote
  #8  
June 17th, 2012, 01:49 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Ontario Canada
Posts: 2,684
well I haven't been at it too too long but I have made changes over the last 10 years.

My biggest change is that with my older two I co-slept. After my son died in my bed I have stopped co-sleeping and don't plan to do it this time around.

I am switching to cloth diapers. I wanted to in the past but I didn't have a washing machine at home and thought it would be just to hard to take them to the laundry mat.

I don't feed on any time schedule my first and my last weren't ready for baby food until after 8 months, my daughter was ready for some at 5 months. I just judge it based on what the child seems to need.
__________________
MOM of 6!

Thanks to Bokkechick for my wonderful Siggy!
Reply With Quote
  #9  
June 17th, 2012, 02:15 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,132
I went to the well checks because I enjoyed going to them... not for any benefit of my kids, purely for my enjoyment ..IT WAS FUN DAMMIT.

I think with each of my kids they have been told to sleep a different way. I thought the point of "tummy time" was to encourage them to lift their head and crawl? Which they do anyway, but then, that didnt exist with 4/5 of my children so when I was being told about it with Sash I was sitting there going "eh?"

I also received from the local well child centre when Sash was a year old a recipe book of baby foods, some that involved hours of cooking time and included how to introduce your child to herbs and spices. Starting solids with my older four was "here, I mashed up a banana with a fork" "heres something different, I mashed up an avocado with my fork" "hmm, what else can I mash up with a fork?" my children never had official introductions to herbs where I charted which herbs they have tried and with what foods and what their reactions were, and they all eat herbs and spices now, so I think theyre good.

I find it a little odd that nowadays there are so many 'special techniques' to talk to your kids. I understand it for little ones who have disabilities like autism, but for children who don't, I just don't understand it. We had a parents info session at Sasha's kinder a few months back and there was a psychologist in there telling us about how we can speak to our kids to get the best responses out of them and interpret the meaning. That just seemed to warped to me, I don't care about why Sash wants strawberry yoghurt one day and vanilla the next, and peach the day after that, im sorry, not that high up on my priority list.

Also, is it just me, and this is probably off topic slightly, but have kids shows really been dumbed down? When I think about the "channel 2 afternoon lineup" that Dita and Azriel used to watch when they were around Sasha's age, they were watching things like Horrible Histories, Round The Twist (I don't think you guys would have had that one, but it was a good show, about a family who lived in a haunted lighthouse) Rugrats, Hey Arnold. They all had some kind of little 'cleverness' to them, or were educational. Whereas now, we have 3 free-to-air channels, two of them are showing the exact same thing, of some giant panda-alien in a 'ninky-nonk', on rotation with other giant alien creatures going "BAAALLOOOOOOO" and and ******* Charlie and Lola going "But I not ever never ever but ever clever heather want to big bad terrible absolutely sad cry cry ant in your pants glass of milk". And the other one is showing preteens and boyfriend problems 24/7. It's like TV executives want to develop a generation of stupid children, or this generation of TV people are stupider than the last and it is showing in what they come up with.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
June 17th, 2012, 02:37 PM
KrazE's Avatar ShutTheFrontDoor
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,546
Edit to remove post
__________________
~~~~~~~~~~


Last edited by KrazE; July 9th, 2012 at 09:58 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
June 17th, 2012, 04:19 PM
Veteran
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 132
After my first I realized I didnt have to do what drs told me to just because they were drs. So I switched to a midwife and more "natural" child birth.

Tummy time really just came about because of sleeping babies on their backs and carrying them around in carseats everywhere. Babies were getting flat heads and not developing neck muscles. So if you dont do these things exclusively then you dont need to worry about tummy time. My kids wont sleep on their backs so they sleep in bouncy seats or on their tummy depending on the kid.

As we have seen vaccines that my older kids got recalled, I have become more conservative with them. I get them on a slower schedule so that I know what their reacting to. And I dont get vaccines for simple illnesses like chickenpox or rotavirus.

I still feed my babies about 4-5 months. I have always found that if I wait they are more resistant to new foods and textures.

We do eat more organic foods and use more homeopathic remedies.
__________________
Angel '97 Aundrea '04 Alex '06 Ammon '08 Aleah '10 Ava '10 Adalyn '12
Reply With Quote
  #12  
June 17th, 2012, 05:03 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 8,252
I remember my mom and grandma always telling me not to hold my oldest too much as a newborn for fear that she'd get "spoiled".

I feel that we've gotten more competitive as we've gone along, it's no longer okay for a baby to be a baby or a toddler to be a toddler, they're all "advanced" and there's a much bigger focus on your kid being "smart".
wishing and JoyfulChaosMama like this.
__________________
mom of 5 girls
Reply With Quote
  #13  
June 17th, 2012, 07:08 PM
MIL2lissy8's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Location: southern cali
Posts: 3,213
interesting thread! whoever above talked about tv -- totally agree! i did some things differently for wyatt than i did for my own kids -- wish i would have been informed about cloth diapers with him cuz i would have been on board in a heartbeat. i think we were too easy on his food choices ---i guess cuz i am older and it was more convenient than making him try what we were eating. he is uber picky now but getting better. i wait on food for all of the kids though because i had kids with reflux and tummy problems and milk allergies. i didn't have to deal with the sleep issue because wyatt was always on a wedge and harness so he could not really move around much. it kept his food in though. also i loved the idea of wearing a baby rather than using a carrier all the time. wish i had known a lot of what i know know now about parenting when i was younger.
__________________
school's out for the summer.....

~~terre~~
Reply With Quote
  #14  
June 17th, 2012, 07:23 PM
jhmomofmany's Avatar Look! A Dancing Banana!
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Upper Michigan
Posts: 14,233
Send a message via Yahoo to jhmomofmany
I don't parent the same as I did 17 years ago, but that's certainly not because I'm going along with "experts" who have probably never had children and if they did they probably never had as many as I've had, LOL!

And all the "rules" for pregnancy now! It's no wonder so many young women are *terrified* of pregnancy and especially childbirth. The information out there is nothing but doom and gloom and how miserable and yucky the whole process is.
__________________
~Jennifer, wife of one, mother of many

Robert: 18 Raechel: 17 Daniel: 14 Joseph: 12 Thomas: 10 Mary Mae: 6 Lucy Marie: 4 and John Anthony, 1!!

Always Missing our Angels: Hope (7-8-06 @36w) and Francis (7-4-12 @12w)


I've lost 60 pounds, and I'm stronger than ever! No gimmicks, no BS, just exercise, nutrition, and support from the awesome Fitness and Weight Loss board here at JM!! Click the blinkie to join us!



Reply With Quote
  #15  
June 17th, 2012, 08:01 PM
KrazE's Avatar ShutTheFrontDoor
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,546
Edit to remove post
__________________
~~~~~~~~~~


Last edited by KrazE; July 9th, 2012 at 09:58 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #16  
June 17th, 2012, 09:22 PM
Mom to 8 amazing kids
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Melba, Idaho
Posts: 2,607
Quote:
Originally Posted by KrazE View Post
I think I've hit a stage in life, since mine are all teens now, that the childless mothers, or those just expecting their first irritate the life out of me carrying on as though they have all the answers to everything, and how they expect pregnancy, birth & child rearing to be a specific way with no other options.

I despise being questioned about my choices as a parent, why I did or didn't do something for my kids by these same females because they are obviously not asking to help them decide on choices, or to actually get anyone's opinion.

I really think those that are just starting out should really stop & think about the audience around them before they post snide remarks about others; everyone is a perfect parent before you have kids....
I agree, there is another board I go to and it's a mom w/ teens kinda thing and nothing irks me more then mom's of 5 year olds telling parents what they should do with their teen child, because you know "they were once a teen". Really? So was I, and I even remember thinking I would let my kid do X,Y and Z. Then reality sets in and as a mom of a teen you "get it". You get where your parents were coming from..on some things anyways
__________________
Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:29 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0