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The things people say about large families


Forum: Large Families

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  #1  
October 21st, 2012, 07:39 AM
marlz_04's Avatar Member
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It really gets to me the things people say. Most of the time I just smirk and walk away or make a lame joke back. or tell them to shut up.

People always exepct im going to be pregnant, so i get "are you pregnant?", "when are you due?", " whens ya next", "4!!??" "dont you have a tv, hahaha", "****** rabbits", "dont you think theres enough people in the world", "why dont you get your tubes tided? or the snip?".

I had a guy pull me up about me doing my fair share or populating the country and he hopes i dont have anymore because one day our kids will be a war and his kids will be fighting mine.. and his training his to kill already.. of course i laughted thinking he was joking until he corrected me.

other then that i swear people just hate inviting us over because of the kids..

What are some things people have said to you and how do you respond?
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  #2  
October 21st, 2012, 07:46 AM
UrbanMomma's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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People say dumb **** all the time. I quit caring a whole buncha kids ago. Most of the time the very unoriginal people say "don't you know what causes that?" and I give em something back along the lines of "its so much fun" or "dh and I are really good at it." Usually shuts them up.

Really only my mom and grandma invite us all over, but now my gma is 87 and all the kids are a bit much for her. My brothers invite us all over when they want "instant bday party" for one of their kids. Nothing like "Party in a Van" rollin up!

I don't care. I love my kids, my husband, my chaos, my life!
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  #3  
October 21st, 2012, 08:45 AM
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Now that the kids are older we get a lot less comments and even before it wasn't so much about the size of my family, but more stupid comments on not having boys.

We're not catholic, but around here, most farm families of dutch descent going to our particular denomination of church tend to have big-ish families.

Most of the comments we get is that my kids are beautiful, and not really many rude ones, the only thing we really get is "poor dad" to which I respond "why?" but that's more dumb than rude.
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  #4  
October 21st, 2012, 09:57 AM
Farmers-wife's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I know I shouldn't but lately I have been reading articles against large families. It really got to me. Thankfully I can come here and feel normal.

My husband showed me an ad in a magazine for a new Nissan 12 passenger van. It had this huge beautiful huge mansion like house. Then there were a bunch of kids (all white) with all kinds of different equipment for every kind of sport or activity. No large family I know looks like that!
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  #5  
October 21st, 2012, 10:05 AM
marlz_04's Avatar Member
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In the town I live in 4 is a LARGE number of kids. Most have 1-3 kids.. 3 is even big here. So i get looked at as a good but crazy mother.. and most probably think i cant keep my legs shut.

No large family i know is like that.
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  #6  
October 21st, 2012, 10:44 AM
Momtothe6thpower's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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The kids are going to war???? WTH

I don't normally get mean comments, teased yes, but usually we all walk away laughing. Dh and I are pretty laid back about it.
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  #7  
October 21st, 2012, 02:46 PM
Iluvmybabies*'s Avatar Proud Mama to 5 girls
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I only have 4 at the moment but we plan on having lots more(like 5 more or more)I don't get to much slack, there are lots of big(4 or more)families in my city
I get a lot of "your crazy" and "why?" lol I always just shrug it off I am so proud and LOVE being a mom of many so it doesn't bother me much
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  #8  
October 22nd, 2012, 05:34 AM
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I have gotten comments but by now most people know to not comment negatively, the one I get the most is when I am pregnant people say so is this it? ummm its none of your business but I always smile and say you never know, or we hope the youngest will be the middle child, or we are trying to outnumber the idiots.

I also get the wow your crazy comments. People are going to hate no matter what. they just don't hate to me face.
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  #9  
October 22nd, 2012, 07:50 AM
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Last night we took all the kids out to a pizza buffet for pizza. So it's me and hubby and the 9 kids, two in high chairs. We did get lots of nice comments on the kids behaving and the staff came over and thanked us when they saw the oldest 3 on the floor picking up after the babies. So it was a nice time.

But when hubby and I were walking up to the buffet, a man stopped us and asked us if they were all ours. To which we relyed "yes" and than he asked us if we got them all from "the home". He said,"the orphanage?" I looked at him strange. Hm. All the kids look like us and each other and you can see an age progression.....

First time I was ever asked that.
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  #10  
October 22nd, 2012, 09:54 AM
Farmers-wife's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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My husband and his brother took three to lunch yesterday. An old couple came up and said how good the kids were being. Then he asked dh where he is from. Dh said Monticello. Old man said "before that?" Dh says Panama City. Old man says "before that?" Dh wanted to says his mothers vagina, but didn't. The old man then explained he thought they were Yankees.
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  #11  
October 22nd, 2012, 09:56 AM
Rebelmommy's Avatar Mommy to controlled chaos
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Most people where we live have 1 or 2 children.. 3 is considered large..(as a matter of fact we only know one family that has 3, now that I think about it!) us, they consider strange. They consider us even stranger when I tell them I would like at least another 2-3, although I am currently working on convincing DH that 6 is a nice round number..LOL
We get the normal things like "You're done after this one right?" (not your business when I am done TYVM!), " You know what causes that right?" (Yes I do and enjoy it very much TY!) and mostly we get stares or whisperers of the ever popular "Are they all yours?" comments. But we got those even when we had only 3 children as all of the children as well as DH and I are blonde and people always seem to have to make a comment about us all being blonde, or so many blondes in one place. *sigh*
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  #12  
October 22nd, 2012, 10:02 AM
Repti.Mom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Some of these are actually hilarious. The orphanage thing, and the instant birthday party. I guess we are an instant birthday party too! We just went to one this weekend and had just as many kids as all the other kids combined, AND we left one at grandmas lol

Rob hears comments at work. I wonder sometimes if it bothers him, but he always has positive things to say to me as comebacks.

Sydney's teacher asked me if we were going to have number 8. This was after she said that she came from a big family too so I didn't mind. I told her not this year.
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  #13  
October 22nd, 2012, 11:35 AM
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I had a funny thing happen this weekend...

Two of my girlfriends and I were having a quiet girls night away from the families. My friend who offered to design my logo in exchange for photos asked randomly...'So have you thought of a name yet?" To which I replied nonchalantly 'No, not yet." Meanwhile, we notice my other friend who is practically choking on her drink and she's all 'Gosh dangit (not exactly those words) Cortney, Another ONE?? And you didn't even TELL ME!' I about died laughing!!
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  #14  
October 22nd, 2012, 12:12 PM
Repti.Mom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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She meant a name for your logo? Or did she think you're pregnant. I'm confused LOL
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  #15  
October 22nd, 2012, 12:44 PM
Farmers-wife's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Two friends. One talking about the logo. The other not knowing anything about the logo assumes baby.
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  #16  
October 22nd, 2012, 03:45 PM
sarahlorrain's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I thought I replied to this thread, but I guess not.

I hadn't received any rude comments yet, other than my mom and mil both saying "I thought you'd taken care of that?" Like it's any of their business.

Yesterday I saw a woman I know but haven't seen in a long time. She looks at me, asks if I'm expecting again. When I say Yes, she says "Dang girl! Aren't you done yet?" Then makes some lame comment about a basketball team since this is #5.
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  #17  
October 22nd, 2012, 04:11 PM
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We actually got more comments when I had 3or4. I guess people figure we must be beyond hope now.
I mostly just get comments on how busy I must be.
Although I had one guy say "My god I hope your husband had a vasectomy" I really wanted to ask him if he made a habit of asking about other mens genitals.
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  #18  
October 22nd, 2012, 04:23 PM
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We got comments from number 3 on. Until number 6. No one except my FIL and BIL made comments on Number 6 and that was "not to have more kids than you can afford" to which my reply was condolences to my BIL since he and his wife could only "afford 2". That shut them up. It makes me angry to hear comments from my BIL because he and his wife have 3 angel babies, so of all people, you would think THEY find every child a blessing. Their angel babies were second and third trimester losses.

Now on my side, we're FROM big families, so none of my family find it any big deal, and celebrate each and every new family member as a gift.
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  #19  
October 22nd, 2012, 05:28 PM
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The party bus in a van left me lol!

I haven't had anyone be rude. I do get the teasing, it's good natured so it doesn't bother me.
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  #20  
October 22nd, 2012, 07:48 PM
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In my specific town, people gawk alot. I think it's so funny, we only have 4 kids. We go to the next town and it's perfectly normal. They are very supportive and welcoming and I love it! I usually get the "Are you Mormon?" question. I respond with "Nope, Catholic".
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