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Bedrooms (chores)


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  • 3 Post By Farmers-wife
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  #1  
January 13th, 2013, 05:33 PM
mommy2lilmen's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Delta, BC Canada
Posts: 2,919
Who cleans their rooms? What ages are they

I have ages 15-9 that are in charge of cleaning their rooms and I feel they are old enough to do so, however their stepmom tells them its an excuse of mine that I am making them clean their room when I am home all day I can do it. I seriously want to strangle that princess..Anyways..I do their laundry (wash and fold), i change their beds.. they are in charge of making their beds, putting laundry in basket, keeping floors clean, I sweep their floors and dusting dresser top. is that unreasonable of me to ask?? Their step mom has 2 kids, yes she works, BUT her kids also are spoiled. Ugh.. My younger 3, well my 3 and 2 year old have to throw toys into toy boxes put puzzles into proper boxes and thats it. I feel kids who do chores respect, apparently I am torchering them. I wonder if my kids new stepmom is making my life hell by saying that to them.
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Mommy to 7 boys and 1 girl!
Sean 16, Justin 13, Kevin 11, Jayson 10, Bryce 4, Seth 3 & Kade 1
4 babies 94,95,99, 08~TL April 2003 & Sept 2013 TR May 2008

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Blessed with 1 Autistic and 1 Down Syndrome child
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alyssa Marie Jade
September 1, 2013 @ 11:01pm 6lb 8oz & 18.5in
Emerg C Sec, Down Syndrome blessing, AVSD, Hirschsprungs, G tube
58 day NICU stay, Sept 1- Oct 29 2013





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  #2  
January 13th, 2013, 05:54 PM
Farmers-wife's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 6,179
Ask for more child support. That will shut her up.

I don't do that much for my 11-16 yos.
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  #3  
January 13th, 2013, 06:10 PM
Mom to 8 amazing kids
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Melba, Idaho
Posts: 2,626
The older ones are on their own. I close my eye's and stay out of the basement. The younger ones (11,8.6 and 3) I for the most part clean. I make them pick it up, but it has to be done in a certain way or nothing fits. So it's 80% me and 20% them.
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  #4  
January 13th, 2013, 06:20 PM
Kierasmom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 23,763
You live here, you work here. Even my 3 year old helps clean up her room and the playroom.
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  #5  
January 14th, 2013, 03:12 AM
4 Boys & 4 Girls !
Join Date: Apr 2011
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Posters # 2&4...well...pretty much summed it up...


I think what you are doing is very fair and sounds just right. Considering the age group that you are targeting is spot on. I know its hard as a mother/cartaker/nurchurer/part time spoiler is hard to divy out chores, but I agree the idea that some kind of chores makes the child more responsible and learns to be tidy and clean. Its the right thing to do IMO.

And if all else fails on the side of shutting up the 'Princess' then revert back to poster #2--FarmersWife- Ask for more child support!!@
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  #6  
January 14th, 2013, 07:00 AM
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Andrews AFB, MD
Posts: 15,492
My older three kids are 7, 6, and 4 and they clean up their rooms and own messes. I do go in every few months and do a deep clean myself.

Now when I was a teenager my room was a disaster zone.
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  #7  
January 14th, 2013, 07:12 AM
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Your goal is to prepare your children to be competent adults, and so, even if you have the time to do so, they should be used to cleaning up their own space, so they're not completely lost once they move out. You (and I) are already really nice doing the things that we do.

My oldest is messy, but she HATES me touching her stuff and feels it's an invasion of her privacy, so every so often I tell her that all the clothes in her room need to be cleaned up, and I threaten to clean her room if she doesn't do it. I think I myself mop her floor/clean maybe once a year. The room is not the way I'd like it, but it's her space, and I don't feel like cleaning her room. #2 loves things organized, her room is always clean. I organize and clean #3's room with her, she hangs on to too many things, but as far as keeping it tidy in between, it's her job. I help #4 and #5, they share a room and the have toys in there, so when we have guest it gets messy, but we're trying to get in the habit of just putting stuff away before bed so it doesn't become disasterous.

For the record, I hate the "I work" thing, it's not a competition, and someone with 2 kids hasn't got a clue how much work 7 kids is. She's just being a bag and feels inferior to you if she feels the need to put you down.
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  #8  
January 14th, 2013, 12:09 PM
mommy2lilmen's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: Delta, BC Canada
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AmiraX2 View Post
Posters # 2&4...well...pretty much summed it up...


I think what you are doing is very fair and sounds just right. Considering the age group that you are targeting is spot on. I know its hard as a mother/cartaker/nurchurer/part time spoiler is hard to divy out chores, but I agree the idea that some kind of chores makes the child more responsible and learns to be tidy and clean. Its the right thing to do IMO.

And if all else fails on the side of shutting up the 'Princess' then revert back to poster #2--FarmersWife- Ask for more child support!!@
Ims upposed to get more child support but my ex feels its too much so he gives me the bare minimum that the courts will allow himto jip me with. I had stopped fighting him on that. Its better to get a bit than nothing at all. and considering I have soul custody of the kids and he refuses to have them live with him guess the little bit is ok.
I often wonder if things would be different on how they figure who should do what (my ex and his wife) if the older 4 lived with him. I wonder if she would like to pick up a 15 year olds dirty underwear, or change his bed , the kids age ranges there would be 15, 12, 12, 10, 9, 8 (she has 2 kids of her own) plus work, etc. I think she would be rethinking on how much my boys should be doing. Im not saying I let them slave labor, but their rooms to me should be their responsibilities. I also give them house chores to do.
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Mommy to 7 boys and 1 girl!
Sean 16, Justin 13, Kevin 11, Jayson 10, Bryce 4, Seth 3 & Kade 1
4 babies 94,95,99, 08~TL April 2003 & Sept 2013 TR May 2008

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Blessed with 1 Autistic and 1 Down Syndrome child
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alyssa Marie Jade
September 1, 2013 @ 11:01pm 6lb 8oz & 18.5in
Emerg C Sec, Down Syndrome blessing, AVSD, Hirschsprungs, G tube
58 day NICU stay, Sept 1- Oct 29 2013





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  #9  
January 14th, 2013, 12:19 PM
Repti.Mom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 15,641
Nothing is in my kids bedrooms except for beds and dressers, and maybe the couple toys they take to bed (stuffed animal/ doll/ book/ something). The older ones CAN make their own beds, but I usually do it because it's while they're at school. I'm talking after I wash, not every day making of the bed. They DO unmake beds, and that's everyone down to the 5 year old.

Anyway, a 15,12,10, and 9 year old can definitely make their beds, pick up the floor and pick up their own sunny side up undies
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  #10  
January 14th, 2013, 12:21 PM
mommy2lilmen's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: Delta, BC Canada
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Quote:
Originally Posted by #5in2005 View Post
Your goal is to prepare your children to be competent adults, and so, even if you have the time to do so, they should be used to cleaning up their own space, so they're not completely lost once they move out. You (and I) are already really nice doing the things that we do.

My oldest is messy, but she HATES me touching her stuff and feels it's an invasion of her privacy, so every so often I tell her that all the clothes in her room need to be cleaned up, and I threaten to clean her room if she doesn't do it. I think I myself mop her floor/clean maybe once a year. The room is not the way I'd like it, but it's her space, and I don't feel like cleaning her room. #2 loves things organized, her room is always clean. I organize and clean #3's room with her, she hangs on to too many things, but as far as keeping it tidy in between, it's her job. I help #4 and #5, they share a room and the have toys in there, so when we have guest it gets messy, but we're trying to get in the habit of just putting stuff away before bed so it doesn't become disasterous.

For the record, I hate the "I work" thing, it's not a competition, and someone with 2 kids hasn't got a clue how much work 7 kids is. She's just being a bag and feels inferior to you if she feels the need to put you down.
I try to stay out of my older 2 bedroom, if I go in there I will organize it and they will hate it, looks too girly. As of late, it isnt the way it used to be, dirt, hair, garbage, dishes etc. we dotn allow food or drinks int heir rooms, but I bend the rules to my older ones as long as they keep their rooms clean. I think at age 15 they are old enough to know that its not nice mommy sees your underwear LOL there is enough I have my husbands clothes to wash. I think in 2 years he be out on his own, if I continued to do it all, where would he be in 2 years. LOST. As for my exs wife. She is just that, inferiour. I dont have my home the way I would like it, but I also have 2 dogs running around, 2 toddlers that dont beleive sitting at the table to eat, so i have crumbs everywhere. but it is no where near what she portrays my house to be. Yes she works, so does my husband, My husband even cleans here when hes worked.. so the I WORK is a load of crap.
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Annick
Mommy to 7 boys and 1 girl!
Sean 16, Justin 13, Kevin 11, Jayson 10, Bryce 4, Seth 3 & Kade 1
4 babies 94,95,99, 08~TL April 2003 & Sept 2013 TR May 2008

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Blessed with 1 Autistic and 1 Down Syndrome child
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Alyssa Marie Jade
September 1, 2013 @ 11:01pm 6lb 8oz & 18.5in
Emerg C Sec, Down Syndrome blessing, AVSD, Hirschsprungs, G tube
58 day NICU stay, Sept 1- Oct 29 2013





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  #11  
January 14th, 2013, 12:53 PM
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 400
My kids are 8,5,3 and 14 months. The older two sleep together so they have to make the bed together. They still have to clean their own rooms though. (Since they play together, if I know that one did the majority of the mess, s/he will be responsible for it). The 3 year also has to clean his room but he doesn't play much in there so it's not often. They are responsible for anywhere in the house where they make a mess. To be honest, I have even started the baby cleaning up what she takes out. She actually listens WAY better than the 3 year old. I made the mistake of using the excuse for my 3 year old(when he was younger), "he's little." so I had trouble getting him to clean. That's why I started the baby picking up her stuff. (not all, of course LOL)
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  #12  
January 15th, 2013, 08:48 AM
2pinks&ablue's Avatar Chantelle
Join Date: May 2007
Location: NB, Canada
Posts: 36,142
My oldest two (almost 4 and 5), clean their own rooms and any mess they make elsewhere. They clean up toys, books, laundry, craft stuff, and make their beds. That's THEIR job, not mine. I go in once in a while and help to organize, but day to day, it's on them. They also have other chores. My 18 month old helps pick up her toys too.
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  #13  
January 15th, 2013, 09:29 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Andrews AFB, MD
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Maybe I spoke too soon. Today they are being lazy. I asked them to pick up their room. They instead shoved all their toys in a cubby behind my son's loft bed. They are now bagging them up in trash bags, because I figure if they care so little for their things then they don't deserve to have them. Since we are conveniently moving in another month I'll just go through them myself and bring them back out then. They'll forget...but hopefully learn a lesson. Little turkeys....
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