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  #1  
November 7th, 2006, 09:07 AM
kristic0776's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Layton, UT
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HI, i'm Kristi and my dh is charles...we have 3 kids...amber (12, technically my stepdaughter) Nick (almost 6), and Gabe (3)...and i'm pg with #4, a boy, due in March 5, but it's a sure bet i'll deliver early. I have had preterm contractions since 19 w's and have been on Procardia since. I am not currently on bedrest, but will probably be soon. trying to take it easy, which is not easy with 2 little ones at home (Nick is in Kindergarten) and driving 20 mins to drop off and pick up at school. Amber and Nick go to a charter school, not the local public schools.

I didn't realize that this baby puts us into the "BIG" family position, I guess it does. My dh comes from 10 and i come from 4. I always wanted 4, so, here i am.

But, i'm seriously questioning my parenting skills. I fear that i'm bringing another child into chaos and that i really don't have a clue what i'm doing. I am trying to do some online parenting classes, but the lady and her "crew" are on maternity leave until Jan. I feel like my discipline tactics are all over the map and it's no wonder my kids are confused and acting badly.

Do any of you cry because you feel you have lost control? I realize right now that i have LOTS of pregnancy hormones going on right now, which can aggravate lots of things, but with my complications, i'm not able to do as much as i know i need to do. and i feel guilty.

Ok, that's enought for now. I hope that i am welcome here, because i have lots of questions and need lots of parenting advice.
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  #2  
November 7th, 2006, 01:39 PM
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Location: Cleveland, OH
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Oh heavens, I've been a mess this pregnancy. No patience at all. I've just been exhausted and it's so hard to deal with the kids' shenanigans. I think for almost everyone parenting is a big crapshoot. Somedays you'll do great, other days will be awful. There are so many factors -- your mood, each child's mood, their ages, their general temperament, who else is around and how each kid shows off for outsiders...

Give yourself a break. Try to be patient and gentle with your kids and let things slide whenever possible. If you get too mad just forgive yourself and move on and try to handle the next situation better. How is your dh about the discipline and about supporting you?
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  #3  
November 7th, 2006, 02:49 PM
LadyBelle's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 10,125
Welcome to the board

jump right in the ladies here are great.
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  #4  
November 7th, 2006, 04:25 PM
coryletum's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: UK
Posts: 180
Hi! And welcome from a relative newcomer here myself...

I think ereryone has those times when they feel Attila the Hun would make a more caring parent than themselves...and when you add into the mix pregnancy hormones, then those times will probably be a lot more frequent.

I have days now when I snap too rapidly at one or another of them, usually because I am trying to feed the baby, load the washing machine, stop dinner from incinerating, move a kitten to the litter box with my right foot and answer the telephone to (in all likelihood) a ruddy cold-calling market researcher at the same time...the request for a drink NOW! gets a less than gentle refusal!! I think as long as I recognise it and take the time to apologise afterwards with a cuddle, then it gets forgiven and forgotten; and I make a mental note to count to ten (fifty? seven thousand??) before answering next time....

I think as well when pregnant I became very sensitive to my surroundings, both housework-wise(or lack of it!) and family behaviour-wise, and became highly critical of what I saw as my failures (eg the huge pile of laundry that I really couldn't face, the kids squabbling about the daftest of things.) I had to really force myself to be gentle with myself and realise that Superwoman never had children!

You have so much to cope with at the moment - you need to be kind to yourself, hun. If you feel like it is all building up and getting too much then maybe try a relaxation technique that works for you (mine was to make myself a cup of tea and put Meatloaf on very loud and sing along .)

I really hope that your pregnancy doesn't become much more stressful, and again - be gentle with yourself,

luv Rodena xxx
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  #5  
November 7th, 2006, 04:47 PM
kristic0776's Avatar Super Mommy
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[quote]

Dh has his moments. He can be so caring one day and supportive, and then he can turn into a bear and isn't nice to anyone. I just can't count on him, especially when he leaves the house at 7:15am and gets home sometime between 6:30-7pm and it seems like there is always a problem with a car or the basement needs to be worked on, and whatnot. so, he's only so much help.
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  #6  
November 7th, 2006, 07:45 PM
Stacey's Avatar Super Star...mom to 6 ♥
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: New York
Posts: 21,411
Hello and welcome aboard!

Im Stacey married to Raymond for 18 years! We have 4 kids...Justin is 18, Alex is 16, Amber-Rae is 6 and Alyssa is 16 months!

You will do great and lear to adjust so dont be hard on yourself! Of course there will be times when you want to pull your hair out of your head but thats with a family of 1 or 20. Amber is 12 and Im sure she will be such a big help to you.

Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy! I was put on bedrest at 4 months....it was hard because Amber-Rae was only 4 at the time. My dh works crazy hours so I barely see him. Thankfully I had the two older boys to help me out otherwise Alyssa would have been born wayy to early!
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