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I’m new here, but not new to forums.
Just looking for a bit of reassurance (maybe) and insight.
Just a little background …
My DH and I have been together for 12 yrs. We both have kids, all older. I have 3 girls (19, 17, 15) and twin boys (16) and he has 2 boys (19, 15) and 1 girl (13).
We’ve always talked about having an “ours” but never really made the decision to take the step. We have custody of all 3 of my DH’s kids, at different stages. His x is crazy & has wreaked havoc on all of us over the years and we cannot seem to get away from her (a whole other story). The first being his 15 yr old son when he was 7. He suffered a lot of abuse from his mom and were always in/out of therapy & dealing w/ emotional issues and violent outbursts – having another never seemed to be the right thing to do.
We started talking about it again about 2 yrs ago when his daughter started pushing us to have a baby … but nothing more than a bit of joking around. This started again around this past fall. It’s time for my Mirena to be removed and he simply has made multiple comments to just “leave it out”. BC pills make me sick and I got pregnant w/ my last not only being on the pill, but 8 wks on depo.
Fast forward to now … we lost my 15 yr old step son in December. Since then, it has kinda come up more often and we’ve discussed it quite in depth. We both know that having another will not bring him back – and this was not our intention, but it feels more right now, than ever. The few people that I have mentioned our thoughts to, whom I thought would tell me I’ve lost my mind to have another at 43, w/ 8 kids already and the youngest being 5 yrs from being out of the house … have all said they think it’s great.
I’m healthier now than I was in my 20/30s. I don’t smoke. I’m 65 lbs lighter. I eat healthy and workout several days a week.
We have decided not to go to any extraordinary measures … I’m simply planning to have my IUD removed and see what happens. If it’s meant to be, it will be.
I’m not so much worried about starting over … as I am worried about my age and complications.
First, welcome to the boards...I am fairly new around here still as well - I hope you enjoy it.
And next, I am very sorry to hear about your step-son, and I don't think you are crazy at all, if you are healthy and your dr thinks everything is a go, I don't see why your age should matter at all - you seem up to it!
Good luck TTC!