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I have a son from a previous marriage. I have also been trying to conceive for over 4 years. I had one miscarriage d/c a year ago and a natural miscarriage on Chritsmas both @ 6 weeks. My current husband used steroid pills for years and it did damage to his fertility. Eventually I will get pregnant again. We gave up on IUI and have decided not to do IVF. We are on clomid and the years go by and my other child gets older. Because I have conceived 3 times we will just try for another year naturally. I hear that I should consider adoption as it is somehow the "next step".
My parents could not have kids. I am adopted as an infant. My poor parents whom I love dearly found out later in life that adoption is NOT the same as having your own. Their infertility issues never really went away. Their extended family really never considered their children "blood." The adoption was opened at 16 after years after having been closed for years. To grow up not knowing who you looked like or to be around anyone like you was torture. To want to see the face of the woman who gave birth to you and who you are half of should not be looked at as ungratefulness.
Being adopted is a life long issue that deals with the broken thread of family continuity. It causes lasting effects for both mother and child and the child's decendants. For those who want to parent and can't traditionally it should not be a substitute. It is a different path.
Welcome to JM. It sounds like you have had a lot of challenges to face in your life. I truly hope you get your miracle and will send thoughts and prayers your way. You may find some good support and advice on the TTC boards, take a look on the main forum menu which one(s) would be best for you xxx