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I just have to vent for a few minutes. I had IUI # 3 done on Sat May 5th. I can already tell that it didn't work as my PMS symptoms are right on track. It hasn't even been a full week since the procedure and I already know. I tell myself everytime " don't get upset, don't get upset" but that's just silly because it is so hard to get anything BUT upset. We have one more sample as we ordered 4 , after this next procedure and sample we'll have invested 6000$ , it's so much money. I don't even know what will happen after this last sample. Money is just a huge factor in this whole thing as well as my mental well being. My husband is great but I think being the woman, I just feel it differently. The dissapointment , the heartache, the general sadness. It's unlike anything I've ever felt before , it's really hard. I feel blessed for having a healthy life and a loving family and husband but I can't help but feel cursed in the quest to have my own family. I thought the point of living was to continue creating it , to better our futures. I live in a city where the mortaility rate of infants is ( I BELIEVE ) the highest in the country. The other day there was a young father in custody for beating his triplet infants. I don't know how he was able to father children and my husband can't. I know we are faced with injustices every day , this is not a unique situation in human evolution but it does make you stop and wonder, what IS it all about?
I'm sorry to be such a debbie downer ESPECIALLY on a Friday and it's a lovely day in my city today. I sincerely everyone here is one step closer to parenthood.
((((Hugs)))) I know this is so frustrating for you on all ends - emotional, financial, just all of it can be so overwhelming. Hang in there sweetie, and please vent as much as you need to. Also PM me anytime.
Big gigantic virtual hugs Becky. Thank you I am sure some day our dream of being parents will come true- it's just hard working towards it when it seems hopeless sometimes. I am so thankful for Just Mommies !