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Update: Need some serious name help


Forum: Baby Names

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  #1  
August 19th, 2009, 09:15 PM
jodifer's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Michigan
Posts: 293
OK, currently standing my DH and I are in a gridlock on names. We started out thinking 100% we were having a girl so the u/s took us by surprise. We had nothing lined up for a boy. When we had DS my DH literally told me 3 weeks into DATING that if we were to ever have a boy his name would be “the third” so I really didn’t have a choice with my DS – I would have only have input if we were having a girl.
Now we are having a boy again – we are stuck. DH overheard the name “Henry” when were on vacation this summer and has been shoving it down my throat ever since. I don’t mind the name but I have not connected with it. Also I have a few valid points of not wanting it. Henry does not have a real meaning behind it and it’s gaining in popularity (within top #100) which is something we try to stay away from. My DH is a high school teacher – so he knows how popular kid names can get. Currently neither of us know any Henry’s but I just know that by the time this boy gets to school there will be 5 in his class. My BF works in a hospital and stated this month alone there have been 3 Henry’s born.
The name I fell in love with is Jasper which is a really old name dating back to the 1880’s and is currently only in the 400 range in popularity – so I know that it would still be original but sticking to our guideline of being a more old fashioned name. So far I had not “clicked” with any name until I re-examined this one and read up more on the meaning behind it. Jasper means Treasure(r) and is also the name of a brilliant ruby spotted jem. Our DS name is Peter and his meaning is “Rock” so I thought these two meaning fit together nicely. Plus – my DH and I were actively trying to have this current baby for over 6 years – and he is my treasure. Also – Peter is the name of one of the Apostles and Jasper is the name of one of the 3 Wise Men. On top of all that – I had a dream of a little boy and his name was Jasper – ever since then I was sold on the name and have not budged.
Now our issue is my DH hates the name Jasper. DH is a very persuasive man and I know he will not give up or in.
What are your thoughts on the names? I have told DH that Henry can be the middle name – but he just can’t get past Jasper being the 1st name.
Any ideas on how I can persuade him?

Update: Over the week I had my Aunt and Uncle in from out of state and my DH mentioned the two names to them since they asked. I personally would not have said anything but he just started into it. When my mom and aunt heard the name Jasper they both cringed horribly. I was really upset to say the least. When we originally mentioned Padraig as a name back at the beginning my mom and dad made some nasty negative comments - hence my hesitation in telling them the new names. However - they had a valid reason for not liking the name. Apparently I have a distant cousin on my moms side of the family that is the black sheep and his name is Jasper. I seriously had never heard of this cousin....this is not helping my case!!
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3/23/2009 - BFP!
7/6 - It's a BOY!!!
11/26 - original EDD
12/2 - New EDD - Expecting Henry Jasper

Last edited by jodifer; August 22nd, 2009 at 07:28 PM. Reason: Update:
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  #2  
August 19th, 2009, 10:46 PM
Doodle's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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i actually know more Jaspers then Henrys BUT that is neither here nor there. Since you had NO say in DS1s name, i think it's time for your opinion to get priority
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  #3  
August 20th, 2009, 01:11 AM
MommaOnCloud9's Avatar Mommy of 3!
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I think it is likely that Jasper will make it into the 100's. In the last 2 years, it jumped 100 ranks to #452. I really think that's in part to the popularity of the Twilight series. Most females that are enjoying those books are in their child-bearing years or will be in the next 6 or so years. So, I only see it climbing the charts.

However, I agree with Doodle. You didn't get any say in DS1's name, so now it's your turn.

Another name you might consider is Harrison. Harry is a form of Henry. So, you could use Harrison (which is at #219 in popularity) and Dh could still call him Henry. I really don't see Henry getting as popular as Jacob, Michael, and the like to the point there would be 5 in a class though. I think it's extremely rare to see 5 Jacobs (the #1 name) in one class. Now, there may be 5 Jacobs in an entire grade for one school though.

Good luck!
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  #4  
August 20th, 2009, 08:19 AM
WishingStar's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I don't know any Henry's or Jasper's. I like Jasper more than Henry, probably because of my Twilight obsession. I like that they are both Biblical names. And I agree, you didn't get a say in the first name, put your foot down and get your say now.
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  #5  
August 20th, 2009, 08:21 AM
LadyGamer's Avatar Objection!!!
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I honestly think Jasper will get more popular than Henry, with the whole Twilight thing.
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  #6  
August 20th, 2009, 08:32 AM
IAmMomMomIAm
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I agree that Jasper is going to climb the charts. Henry has moved up 50 spaces in nine years, and Jasper has climbed up 140. Jasper is less popular now, but will get more popular as your DS ages. I really like both names.

I agree that you should put your foot down and insist on Jasper Henry, since you didn't get a say in Peter's name. At the same time I know how hard the inclination is to want DH to love the baby's name as much as you do.

Do you love the name Peter as much as DH does?
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  #7  
August 20th, 2009, 09:34 AM
jodifer's Avatar Veteran
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"Do you love the name Peter as much as DH does?"

I really couldn't imagine his name being anything else now. I know everyone thinks just because my DH picked out sons name I should have final say on this one - but as he points out - this would be a reversed situation if we had originally had a girl since the girls name was my decision. UGH...why does this have to be so hard.
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7/6 - It's a BOY!!!
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12/2 - New EDD - Expecting Henry Jasper
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  #8  
August 20th, 2009, 10:18 AM
Doodle's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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and had you had a girl first, he'd be getting his Junior this time so really either way he would have gotten his say but you only have a right to your choice if you have a girl?
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  #9  
August 20th, 2009, 10:47 AM
Londa's Avatar At the Crossroads
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How to persuade a man to like a name he hates?! I could make a million off of that answer if I knew it

Sometimes when I just can't picture a baby with a name I will Google Image "Baby Whatever". Most names come up with a bunch of cute babies attached to the name I put in. Sometimes it makes me like the name more. Perhaps you can show him pics of all the cute Baby Jaspers out there. Google Images

Good luck!
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  #10  
August 20th, 2009, 01:06 PM
IAmMomMomIAm
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Letting him pick the boy names and you pick the girl names isn't fair. Lots of mamas end up with five boys!

Your DH should be a little more open to your ideas, IMHO.

Of course, you could always do what my great grandmother did.. she wanted to name her son Raymond, and her husband would only have Richard. So she named him Raymond Richard and never told her husband. He went by Dicky (being told he had no middle name) until he was in his 20s and saw his birth certificate. Then, for obvious reasons, he started going by Ray. Of course this was a very long time ago. I think your husband might notice the name on the certificate when he signs it.
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  #11  
August 20th, 2009, 01:12 PM
Bedazzled's Avatar Mommy to my own superhero
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As dumb as this sounds....try finding someone named Jasper that is related to something your husband likes. What I mean is....if he likes football, see if you can find a great football player named Jasper...if he likes hunting/surfing/etc. see if you can find a brand name w/ Jasper. This has worked for me better than anything else.
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  #12  
August 20th, 2009, 06:21 PM
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My advice is to just keep trying to persuade him. My husband really disliked the name Phoebe when I first mentioned it when we were only a month pregnant. I would send him emails on names and the history of the name Phoebe, the meaning, what it meant to me, etc. By the time she was born he loved the name just as much...but it did take a good 7 months to convince him! Now he's SO happy we chose Phoebe, he loves it as much as I do.

I also want to add that the only other solution would be to find a new name that is neither Henry or Jasper - one you both love.
For some reason Graham and Simon popped into my head.
But honestly I think Jasper Henry is an awesome name.
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  #13  
August 20th, 2009, 06:58 PM
jodifer's Avatar Veteran
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TJJ1209 View Post
As dumb as this sounds....try finding someone named Jasper that is related to something your husband likes. What I mean is....if he likes football, see if you can find a great football player named Jasper...if he likes hunting/surfing/etc. see if you can find a brand name w/ Jasper. This has worked for me better than anything else.

Funny you should mention this. When we first found out I was expecting our boy name was Padraig - after Padraig Harrington - the pro golfer. My DH is the Varsity Boys & Girls Golf Coach at the HS he teaches at. We decided it sounded a little too ethnic with our first names and he might be mistaken as being adopted. So when I told my DH about the Jasper name he stated "You mean Jesper" and I said "No, Jasper". Well apparently there is a pro golfer named Jesper Parnevick. So with having even a reference to someone he likes with a very similiar name is not helping either.

I did a google search to try to find Jaspers in literature and come up blank besides Karl Jaspers. But that's not helpful when it's a last name.

Ugh...why does he have to be so stubborn
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3/23/2009 - BFP!
7/6 - It's a BOY!!!
11/26 - original EDD
12/2 - New EDD - Expecting Henry Jasper
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  #14  
August 20th, 2009, 07:06 PM
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I definitely prefer Jasper over Henry. I know a few little Henry's and no Jaspers.
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