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Last name for baby

Forum: Baby Names


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May 25th, 2012, 09:59 PM
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 203
Hi all,
I was wondering how you all would choose a last name for your baby if you aren't married. Me and my BF are NTNP and if we were to get pg I'm not sure what last name I'd choose. Eventually we would get married and I love him with all my heart and I absolutely wouldn't want to disrespect him in any way but I'm really attached to my family name. My older brother and I are the only ones in my family who currently hold that name and I'd love to keep that going. Is that weird? It's an extremely uncommon last name. I also think if it was hyphenated it would be ridiculous sounding and super long! I would love your opinions ladies!
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May 26th, 2012, 01:29 AM
KirstyB's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Crawley, England
Posts: 1,174
My children have their fathers last name. I just believe that is how it should be. Even if we weren't together when they were born, they'd still have his last name.
Stepson: Oliver - 27/09/09
Son: Owen - 15/08/10
Daughter: Maria - 05/11/11
Baby #4: Due 16/09/14
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May 26th, 2012, 07:29 AM
Aillidh's Avatar Nár lagaí Dia do lámh!
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Somewhere in NY
Posts: 8,083
My kids will have my DH's last name.
Nana, 25
Mama to Pit bulls (Z&M)
Tentatively expecting our first:
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May 26th, 2012, 10:35 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,084
I have made the decision that I will never have a different last name than my children. I am married and took my husband's name, and thats the name I plan on my children having. If we were to ever split up I would not change my name for this reason.

The only senario I could see this getting tricky would be if I were to separate from my husband and have a baby with someone else. I would have to cross that bridge when I get to it. But I feel strongly about having my kids sharing my last name.
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May 26th, 2012, 04:42 PM
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 203
Thanks ladies, I guess that's just what tradition is I guess.
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May 27th, 2012, 08:27 AM
Mana's Avatar Loving My Baby Girl <3
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 3,008
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My kids will have my last name. In my case, it also happens to be my husband's last name, but I only took his name because I hated my old last name and, long story short, his last name is what I wanted to change mine to anyway before I even met him (totally of those "must be fate" moments ). I don't personally care about what's traditional, and since mom will almost definitely be the primary caregiver, together or not, it makes more sense to me for her kids to have her name.

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May 27th, 2012, 11:03 AM
Allie_SMg's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: California
Posts: 2,923
I'm in the same situation. I'm married and am really attached to my last name and have kept it, but I'm thinking of hyphenating my children's name with mine and his or just giving them his, because I don't want to hurt his feelings. It's a tough situation.

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May 27th, 2012, 12:30 PM
Carwen*Angel's Avatar Fly away on my zephyr
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Manchester, UK
Posts: 66,539
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For me, I believe it is right for the child to have dad's surname. My son has his dad's surname. This baby is by my current partner and will have HIS surname. As I am not yet married to my current partner, I will have a different name. It's not all that unusual in modern families.

However, if you have a really unusual surname you want to pass on down and feel strongly about it, I would talk to your DP. If you're not married the decision is essentially yours anyway, and it's whether DP doesn't mind anyway, or whether you feel that strongly it's worth having a fall-out over.

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May 27th, 2012, 03:08 PM
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 203
I am really attached to my last name. It was also my maternal grandmother's and she recently passed away. In all of my family/extended family my brother and I are the only ones with the name. It will definitely be up to discussion with my SO. I in no way want to offend him. He understands so far. Maybe it will be hyphenated no matter how ridiculous it may sound! Haha
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May 27th, 2012, 05:33 PM
mrsjl's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Halifax, Nova Scotia
Posts: 4,914
if I weren't married to the father of my children, no way would they get his last name unless I was 100% sure we were getting married.
mom to
Rebecca (11/22/07), Nathan (7/31/10), and Thomas (5/3/13)

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May 27th, 2012, 08:18 PM
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 203
That makes sense to me! I know for a fact we will get married, not sure if I'd take his last name though. Although I may hyphenate it.
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