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I was wondering how you all would choose a last name for your baby if you aren't married. Me and my BF are NTNP and if we were to get pg I'm not sure what last name I'd choose. Eventually we would get married and I love him with all my heart and I absolutely wouldn't want to disrespect him in any way but I'm really attached to my family name. My older brother and I are the only ones in my family who currently hold that name and I'd love to keep that going. Is that weird? It's an extremely uncommon last name. I also think if it was hyphenated it would be ridiculous sounding and super long! I would love your opinions ladies!
I have made the decision that I will never have a different last name than my children. I am married and took my husband's name, and thats the name I plan on my children having. If we were to ever split up I would not change my name for this reason.
The only senario I could see this getting tricky would be if I were to separate from my husband and have a baby with someone else. I would have to cross that bridge when I get to it. But I feel strongly about having my kids sharing my last name.
My kids will have my last name. In my case, it also happens to be my husband's last name, but I only took his name because I hated my old last name and, long story short, his last name is what I wanted to change mine to anyway before I even met him (totally of those "must be fate" moments ). I don't personally care about what's traditional, and since mom will almost definitely be the primary caregiver, together or not, it makes more sense to me for her kids to have her name.
I'm in the same situation. I'm married and am really attached to my last name and have kept it, but I'm thinking of hyphenating my children's name with mine and his or just giving them his, because I don't want to hurt his feelings. It's a tough situation.
For me, I believe it is right for the child to have dad's surname. My son has his dad's surname. This baby is by my current partner and will have HIS surname. As I am not yet married to my current partner, I will have a different name. It's not all that unusual in modern families.
However, if you have a really unusual surname you want to pass on down and feel strongly about it, I would talk to your DP. If you're not married the decision is essentially yours anyway, and it's whether DP doesn't mind anyway, or whether you feel that strongly it's worth having a fall-out over.
I am really attached to my last name. It was also my maternal grandmother's and she recently passed away. In all of my family/extended family my brother and I are the only ones with the name. It will definitely be up to discussion with my SO. I in no way want to offend him. He understands so far. Maybe it will be hyphenated no matter how ridiculous it may sound! Haha