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Anyone know anything about Korean adoption?


Forum: Adoption

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  #1  
January 15th, 2009, 07:14 AM
BensMom's Avatar Ephesians 4:29
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: The Lonestar State
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I just went to the Dillon website (who I planned to use if I can talk dh into a Korean adoption... it's super expensive, though). As of 1/1/09, they've changed their rules saying you can't adopt through them if you've never adopted internationally before. WHAT?! I seriously started crying when I read that. Are all agencies doing that? Is it just Dillion? Why?????

*edit*

Dangit... I just went through Holt's site, and there are very few countries we'd qualify for either. Why are things changing all of a sudden?!
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  #2  
January 15th, 2009, 07:29 AM
SarahBethsMommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Posts: 4,847
I have heard that there are a lot of countries closing their doors or making it very hard to get through the adoption for Americans. I don't know much about international adoption at all since we are working through foster care, so I'm not sure why they are doing this. I hope you can find a place that you can adopt from that will fit your family!
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  #3  
January 15th, 2009, 07:48 AM
BensMom's Avatar Ephesians 4:29
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I just looked through the adoption pages for my area as well, and there are none available that meet our criteria (for example, there's a sibling group of 3, but we can only take 2, and we have 2 children younger than them... we don't qualify). Why is adoption so frustrating?!?! I can't find anything that tells the cost of a Texas adoption. I requested an info packet though.
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  #4  
January 15th, 2009, 08:17 AM
SarahBethsMommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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You can call your local DHR office and ask for the person who is in charge of new foster/adoptive parents. They should be able to answer your questions. The pictures on the websites like adoptuskids.org are of kids who are waiting to be adopted... in other words those kids are completely free for adoption and can be placed and adopted fairly quickly. If you don't mind dealing with DHR (DSS, CPS, whatever it called in your area), you can foster to adopt which is where you will get a child whose parents still technically have rights and go through all the steps to terminate parents rights (TPR) and then adopt that child. If you go that route, you would probably have a much greater chance to be placed with younger kids. Usually it costs very little to adopt this way. You might pay court fees, but then you'd get reimbursed most of those. DHR has its own lawyers, so you don't have to have one usually (though some people opt to pay their own). The packet should give you some good information!

Adoption is hard, for sure, but I believe the end result is all worth it! KUP on your progress!
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  #5  
January 15th, 2009, 09:12 AM
BensMom's Avatar Ephesians 4:29
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I'm just so scared to foster first. I don't want to get attached to a child only to have him taken away.
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  #6  
January 15th, 2009, 10:04 AM
SarahBethsMommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Then you are probably right about not fostering. DH and I do it because we believe we are gifted to give children a home and show them love (unconditional) and teach them how to be loved for however long we are blessed to know them. I certainly get attached, but I'm an adult and can handle the loss so these kids don't have to. Plus, we have the added benefit of possibly being able to keep them forever... what a gift! But it isn't for everyone.

However, I'd still call them and ask. There could be kids waiting who you just don't know about! You can go the "adoption only" route through DHR... that's perfectly acceptable and needed as well! It might take a while to find the right placement for you and your family and that child, but it happens all the time. Good luck on whatever you decide, seriously. Adoption is a gift in whatever form it comes!! I'm glad you are looking into it!
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  #7  
January 15th, 2009, 10:56 AM
eash's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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We just finished our Korean adoption and yes, most agencies are shutting down to first time adopters. Basically, the Korean government is planning to stop international adoption by 2012 and therefore, less children are available. The waits are up to 2 years in some agencies and the agencies are not comfortable with having people wait that long. The majority of the agencies are allowing first time adopters to adopt waiting children but are very selective of the families that they allow.
Good luck and feel free to PM me any questions.
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  #8  
January 15th, 2009, 11:16 AM
mswordwiz's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
You can call your local DHR office and ask for the person who is in charge of new foster/adoptive parents. They should be able to answer your questions. If you go that route, you would probably have a much greater chance to be placed with younger kids. Usually it costs very little to adopt this way. You might pay court fees, but then you'd get reimbursed most of those. DHR has its own lawyers, so you don't have to have one usually (though some people opt to pay their own). The packet should give you some good information!

Adoption is hard, for sure, but I believe the end result is all worth it! KUP on your progress![/b]
This is what DH and I did, and the cost was minimal for us. Our first foster placement was a sister/brother ages 6/4 that we have since adopted. Our next foster child is 14 and we can file the petition to adopt her in March.
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  #9  
January 15th, 2009, 11:51 AM
BensMom's Avatar Ephesians 4:29
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Quote:
We just finished our Korean adoption and yes, most agencies are shutting down to first time adopters. Basically, the Korean government is planning to stop international adoption by 2012 and therefore, less children are available. The waits are up to 2 years in some agencies and the agencies are not comfortable with having people wait that long. The majority of the agencies are allowing first time adopters to adopt waiting children but are very selective of the families that they allow.
Good luck and feel free to PM me any questions.[/b]
I've seen very little about "waiting" children ... just that there's something wrong that most people don't want to deal with, whether it's age, disability, or whatever. I'm open to certain things, of course, like almost anyone would be, but I don't think I could handle a child with profound disabilites. There are people out there who would do a much better job than I could. What happens if you decide to go on the waiting child list, but then they match you with someone you don't think you can handle? Are you bumped back to the bottom because you said no? Are you taken off the list because you said no?
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  #10  
January 15th, 2009, 02:46 PM
eash's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Quote:
We just finished our Korean adoption and yes, most agencies are shutting down to first time adopters. Basically, the Korean government is planning to stop international adoption by 2012 and therefore, less children are available. The waits are up to 2 years in some agencies and the agencies are not comfortable with having people wait that long. The majority of the agencies are allowing first time adopters to adopt waiting children but are very selective of the families that they allow.
Good luck and feel free to PM me any questions.[/b]
I've seen very little about "waiting" children ... just that there's something wrong that most people don't want to deal with, whether it's age, disability, or whatever. I'm open to certain things, of course, like almost anyone would be, but I don't think I could handle a child with profound disabilites. There are people out there who would do a much better job than I could. What happens if you decide to go on the waiting child list, but then they match you with someone you don't think you can handle? Are you bumped back to the bottom because you said no? Are you taken off the list because you said no?
[/b]
I fully understand. The first part of adoption is recognizing what you can and cannot handle.
With any international adoption, you fill out a medical checklist. It has a list of 200 medical conditions that you would be or not be willing to accept. The conditions range from dry skin to AIDS. When you go for a waiting child (WC), you are more open to conditions, however, many of them are easily correctable. I have good friends who just adopted a boy from China because he was a bit older (14 mos) and has a scar on his abdomen. He was considered a WC.
Many other agencies don't have lists but list their waiting children on their websites. If you see a child with a condition that you are willing to accept, you contact them. There is also a website called rainbow kids that lists all WC. You are never penalized, or dropped down the list, if you don't accept.
The best thing to do is to sit down and have an honest talk with the adoption agency. They are not going to match you with a child that is too much to handle.

Good luck!
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  #11  
January 16th, 2009, 07:23 PM
BensMom's Avatar Ephesians 4:29
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That would be great! My first son was in therapy for a year because he was born with minor orthopedic problems. It's something easily corrected, so that's the kind of thing I'd be open to. Even something long term would be ok, ya' know? I'm SO glad you told me about that checklist. I had no idea there was something like that to pre-screen you. That's wonderful!

*edit* WOW! THANK YOU for pointing me to the rainbow kids site. I've been there two minutes, and already I've found a lot of what I'm looking for. The special needs page lists all sorts of things that I would have no problem with (and in fact, wouldn't consider a special need). Thank you!!!!!
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  #12  
January 17th, 2009, 07:14 AM
LadyLacy's Avatar Super Mommy
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Posts: 818
I have no answers, we are going the FC-Adoption route. but wanted to wish you well. I did hear how hard it was becoming and that is a shame for the dc.

best prayers!
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