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Forum: Adoption

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  #1  
May 11th, 2010, 07:50 PM
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Tennesee
Posts: 44
Hello ladies! I am mostly a lurker but hoping to join this board. I am thinking about adoption for a second child because I cannot have any more kids.

I have a potentially offensive question, but it is a huge concern.. Will I love my adopted child the same way I love my bio daughter? Is anyone else dealing with this? Also, my husband made a good point when we were talking about it- will my adopted child think that we don't love him/her as much even if we do??

I'm so sorry to ask such questions, but I figured you were the best ladies to ask.
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  #2  
May 12th, 2010, 10:13 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: My heart belongs in Washington DC
Posts: 6,415
Hello! welcome to our board! I dont have any children yet so I can't answer your question, but I hope the other girls on this board will be able to answer it, it's actually something that I've been wondering about myself.
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  #3  
May 13th, 2010, 09:03 AM
SarahBethsMommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 4,847
Hey, sorry I haven't been on to answer your question!

I have a foster son who we are hoping we can adopt. I very much love him just as much as I love my biological daughter. In fact, for us, I loved him that much the first time they put him into my arms. There are moments when I've wondered if we were the right family for him, though, and I question myself a lot (he is special needs). Those moments are few though... mostly I just think of him as my son.

My DH had a harder time bonding with him. DH has a hard time bonding with anyone, though, and because of his special needs my son is harder for most people to bond with. So that's been a bit of a struggle.

I know there are women around who have been adopted themselves. I'll see if I can PM a few to answer your question about them feeling loved. I would think that there will always be moments when they say hurtful things about you not loving them (like teenagers will from time to time), but if you treat them all the same and love them all the same I can't imagine that'd be an ongoing issue.

GL in your journey!! Please keep us posted!!
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  #4  
May 13th, 2010, 11:38 AM
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Tennesee
Posts: 44
Thank you for your reply
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  #5  
May 14th, 2010, 01:20 PM
Just_Marie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 28,173
Of my four kids, three are adopted, and I can honestly say that I love them all equally, I would die for any of them in a heartbeat.
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  #6  
May 14th, 2010, 04:52 PM
Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Tennesee
Posts: 44
Thank you very much for your input. I figured I would love all my children the same, but I had to ask... It has been my biggest fear. I would hate for my adopted child to feel like I didn't love him/her the same way I love my bio daughter.
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