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Forum: Adoption

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  #1  
August 10th, 2010, 09:43 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 8,103
Hi ladies, about three weeks ago we were contacted by a young expectant mom. She is only 15 and is 4 months pregnant. Things were going great and now she is back to second guessing herself. I know that this will probably happen a LOT throughout this process. I just really don't know what to say to her to help her through all of this. I have never been in her position. I have never been pregnant, never at such a young age and have never had to contemplate making an adoption plan for my baby. I am completely ready to be here for her, I just wish I knew what to say to help her through all of the emotions she is facing right now.

This is hard...
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  #2  
August 10th, 2010, 04:20 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: My heart belongs in Washington DC
Posts: 6,415
This sounds hard Kari, I honestly don't know what I would say, maybe soemthing to the effect of "I'll support you no matter what you decide." maybe?

Perhaps, one of the other ladies has something to add, I just wanted to let you know I read this.
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  #3  
August 11th, 2010, 12:59 PM
SarahBethsMommy's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 4,847
I'd probably say that as well (I support you no matter what). And mean it. Support her whatever she ultimately decides.

Check out the birthmother's board on here too. Ask them what they think.
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  #4  
August 11th, 2010, 03:53 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 8,103
Thanks guys... I did end up talking with her at length about supporting her and always being there for her when we chatted through gmail chat. She seemed very perceptive. She said she is also going to for sure email the pregnancy counselor I told her about. I hope she'll get the guidance she needs to make an informed decision for herself and her little baby.

I did post over on the birthmother board... as of yet, I didn't see a response. I know it's a slower board, so I'm waiting it out to see if anyone has any words of wisdom.

Thank you ladies for your support. I only know one person IRL that is going through adoption, and nobody that has gone through the process that I talk to on a regular basis.

Anyway, thanks!
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  #5  
August 11th, 2010, 06:08 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: My heart belongs in Washington DC
Posts: 6,415
I sometimes post over there too, but yeah it's a slower board, they give good advice though.
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Thank you to the wonderful ladies who mad the blinkies!

"The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude..... These experiences, while often difficult to bear at the time, are percisely the kinds of experiences that stretch our understanding, build our character and increase our compassion for others."
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  #6  
August 16th, 2010, 06:50 PM
Just_Marie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 28,159
I'm not sure what I would do in your situation, remember that teens can be manipulative and she could play you-nothing is certain until the ink is dry and baby has your last name. We've been very cautious with all three kids, and our adoptions were following birth and uncomplicated. Protect your heart, and do what comes next with joy and integrity. Your child is out there Kari, and he or she might come from someplace other than this little mom. Keep your heart open, and the Universe will deliver. But be cautious, but I know you are.
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  #7  
August 19th, 2010, 06:17 AM
SuperMartianRobotMom6's Avatar Proud Mama & Happy Wife
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: New York
Posts: 3,654
I would just listen to how she feels, you really cant offer advice. Just support her and let her vent her feelings.
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