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Hello! I am Erica, I hae one beautiful son named Peter, he is 8 months old. Our journey to Peter was very hard. I lost 10 pregnancies before I had him. I love him so much! We have been trying (already) for #2 since it took so long to get #1. I have already had 2 losses since Peter was born. I am not willing to have 10 more for another baby.
We have decided to pursue adoption.... We may keep trying for another biological child, but I am honestly not sure how many more losses I can handle. We are lost with all the info out there. I would love a private adoption but don't think we can afford it. I would consider fostering to adopt, but I don't want to displace Peter as our oldest, so we could only do babies, which are scarce and I imagine won't be allowed since we already have an infant.
Hi and welcome! I'm Beth. I am so sorry for all your losses. And Peter is stinking adorable.
I'm a foster and foster to adopt mommy. And you very much can go through the foster system and get young children. With foster to adopt, they place children with you that look like they might need a forever home. It is not a for sure thing, so you have to be willing to support reunification if it is to occur. For me, this was something I could and would do. I believe God will give me the children He wants me to have for the amount of time He wants me to have them, so as hard as it is to say goodbye, I am willing to take on that hurt for the children to have the best.
You can also adopt from foster care without having the uncertainty, but it usually takes a long time to get there if you want only newborns or very young babies. It is NOT impossible though. Many of the foster children who need forever homes have issues like special needs and such. But, again, that is not all either.
With adopting through foster care you can choose a lot about the child who will come into your life. But, of course, things happen as with all children, so sometimes there are surprises.
With private adoption, I know there are some agencies that will set up with a payment plan and handle the exchange of money for you. That might be something you'd want to look into as well.
I'm glad you have found us! I hope you will jump right in!!
Hi Erica! I'm so sorry for your losses. I can't imagine how difficult that must be.
I'm Anna. I have 4 girls. Meagan is 15, Abbey's 13, Kayla will be 9 on Saturday and Ellie is 6. Ellie's adoption was finalized almost a year ago.
I don't have any expirience with fostering/adopting infants myself but I do know a few families with young toddlers who have fostered and adopted babies so it is possible.
The foster system varies a lot by state. I know that at least in my state, even if you just want to adopt through the system you still have to be approved as a foster parent and even with a kinship adoption (adopting a relative; which is what we did) you have to serve as the child's foster family for 6 months before finalizing the adoption. It's more of a formality than anything else but it does mean you have to go through all the classes and be approved by a social worker. (not as scary as it sounds I promise)
Peter is a beautiful boy! I'm glad you're here. Looking forward to getting to know you.
I am a single foster mommy. I specialize in babies/toddlers under 4 who have severe special needs. I don't foster solely to adopt, though I am trying to adopt Avery, one of my current foster children. She is not yet available for adoption, but will be once they get through some red tape.
Beth is right in that you get to choose the age, special needs/none, etc, that your foster to adopt child will have. The narrower your preferences, the longer it will take to get a child. But don't leave them open just because you want a child sooner, if you only want a healthy child, you should wait. I only say this because I see people do this a lot, and see the sad aftermath.
I wish you tons of luck on your journey! Whatever you decide!
Hey Erica, I'm new here too (been lurking for a bit)...but you might remember that we're hoping to adopt our next child. *hugs* Losses are so heartbreaking. I hope that you are able to get some answers about adoption as you begin your adoption journey.
Abigail-Mama to Landon, Layla and Micaiah