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Linda
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 3,009
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Welcome Elizabeth!!! I'm Linda, mommy to Alexzander (7) and adoptive mommy to Katie (6) and Aiden (3). I did a kinship adoption through foster care so its similar but different from what you are doing. Katie and Aiden are biologically my niece and nephew. I didn't get my foster care license until after both children had been living with me for quite a while, and it has now expired but I do plan on fostering in the future once my 3 are a little older so I will have to renew it.
Some things to expect (some from personal experience and some from what I have learned from others)....
-things take a while but don't give up.
-social workers can be hard to get ahold of, just keep calling/emailing if you have to.
-document everything (calls, emails, and do a daily report on each child while they are in your home).
-Expect the unexpected.
-Nothing is final until the judge pounds his gavel.
-Every heart ache, worry, etc is completely worth it when the adoptions are finalized and you become a forever family. Don't ever give up. The adoptions of my two took 3 years and i honestly thought it might never happen, but it did and it made it all worth it. My case was unique with missing paperwork, waiting on TPR of the father who didn't want to terminate his rights but also didn't want to parent or take financial responsibility, and then moving to a different county and more missing paperwork, etc. Most cases don't take 3 years!!
-make sure you and your hubby agree on what you can and can't handle when it comes to behaviors and physical/mental handicaps and stick to it. Don't take in a child that you don't feel like you could handle, because it normally doesn't end well.
-when a social worker calls you about a child they sometimes don't know much more than you do about the child, so they are going off of what they have been told. That's why I say expect the unexpected.
-and most of all enjoy the children who come in your life!!!! They are all precious and amazing in their own way.
I am not trying to scare you but just wanted to give you advice that I have learned over the years from other foster parents. Being a foster parent and an adoptive parent is beyond rewarding!!
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