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Feeling discouraged


Forum: Adoption

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  #1  
February 7th, 2007, 01:13 PM
fallsbaby's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 333
I just thought maybe typing this our would help. I am feeling so discouraged recently. We have been homestudy ready for about 5 month now, and the wait for a "match" with a birthmother is really taking a toll on me.
It is so hard to have no control over the one and only thing that will make my life complete and all my dreams come true. We are honest, hardworking, kind, caring and really nice people, and I just PRAY that someone someday will see that.

Does anyone else ever feel this way?
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  #2  
February 7th, 2007, 02:10 PM
mrsracatoe's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I feel that way at times too. I think that is normal to have all of those emotions. Sometimes I sit and cry wondering when it all will happen. I completely understand your feelings and I feel the same way! I hope that it helps to know that you are definitely not alone!! Feel free to PM me anytime if you need to talk.
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  #3  
February 7th, 2007, 02:32 PM
fallsbaby's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 333
Wow so I am not completely alone!! I just cant believe how different I thought I would feel. I know my baby is out there and I just have to find him or her, but sometimes it is so hard to stay optomistic.

Its hard knowing how badly my hubby wants to have a family, and I cant give that to him. But I know in God's time it will happen.


Thanks for letting me know I am not alone!
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  #4  
February 7th, 2007, 07:38 PM
mrsracatoe's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I keep believing that In God's time it will happen too! Try to find things to do to keep your mind positive. Have you thought about keeping an adoption journal or getting the nursery ready? That is helping time go by a lot better for me. I hope that helps you!
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  #5  
February 8th, 2007, 06:21 AM
m_westbro's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Texas y'all!
Posts: 17,144
I'm so sorry you're feeling down. I can't imagine what this wait must be like for you, but try to hang in there. YOUR baby is coming, and he/she will be perfect for you. Believe it or not, the pain of this long wait is going to melt away when you hold that sweet child in your arms for the first time. God's timing is perfect, though sometimes it is hard to stay patient, I know.

I will be praying that you ladies both get good news soon. Stay positive and get ready, you're going to be new parents before you know it!!!
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  #6  
February 9th, 2007, 12:18 PM
IrishMama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Midwest
Posts: 2,110
believe me I felt that very same way.
Our wait started June 24th 2005, and we got our miracle 12-1-06, 18 months.

The best thing to do is continue the networking, all the time, and make plans to do fun things together, to keep you busy.

The worst thing I did was GAIN the 34 pounds that I had lost during our last try for a bio baby.

Stay strong and keep your support members close, and talk to them a lot.

You will need it even more once you are connected and dealing with the day to day bm chaos that can come up....
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  #7  
February 13th, 2007, 05:20 AM
Member
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Posts: 39
Hi.. very sorry to hear what you feel.. I really hope that you'll get one soon.. so keep the faith and keep praying ..
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  #8  
February 13th, 2007, 06:29 AM
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Location: Omaha, NE
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I'm sorry your feeling that way but it's pretty normal during this wait! I felt the same way for 6 months. There are some things that can "ease" the frustration:

1. write, whether it's a journal or a blog it just helps to get your feelings out.
2. try to find a support group if there is one in your area
3. be proactive in your search for a birthmom, give out cards talk to people about it
4. create a life list and start working on it (it kind of puts things in perspective)
5. do projects that can be finished...completing little things helps to feeling like your atleast getting something done.
6. clean, organize, and rearrange. Its something that's hard to do those things with kids around and it just feels good to throw stuff out!

It will happen for you then the memory of your wait will fade away! When you get that call just be yourself. Keep posting we're all here for you.

HTH
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  #9  
February 14th, 2007, 07:38 AM
m_westbro's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Texas y'all!
Posts: 17,144
Quote:
I'm sorry your feeling that way but it's pretty normal during this wait! I felt the same way for 6 months. There are some things that can "ease" the frustration:

1. write, whether it's a journal or a blog it just helps to get your feelings out.
2. try to find a support group if there is one in your area
3. be proactive in your search for a birthmom, give out cards talk to people about it
4. create a life list and start working on it (it kind of puts things in perspective)
5. do projects that can be finished...completing little things helps to feeling like your atleast getting something done.
6. clean, organize, and rearrange. Its something that's hard to do those things with kids around and it just feels good to throw stuff out!

It will happen for you then the memory of your wait will fade away! When you get that call just be yourself. Keep posting we're all here for you.

HTH[/b]
Great tips Kimberly!
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  #10  
February 17th, 2007, 06:39 PM
fallsbaby's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 333
Thanks everyone, I know it might sound so odd, but i know the wait is actually helping me. I know this time is allowing me to "prepare" mentally. But believe me if that call came tomorrow I would be happy to quit preparing!!!

I went in and talked to my agency yesterday. We have been profiled a total of 5 times in 5 months, and I am happy with that. Its heartbreaking though knowing that 5 women didnt chose you. You begin to wonder what is "wrong" with you.....

Well thanks for the support, and I appreciate the suggestions. I think a journal would be a great keepsake for this time. I can only imagine that maybe someday it woud be great to share it with my child, to show them how much I loved them before I even met him or her!!
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