We pride ourselves on having the friendliest
and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment
for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers.
If you have any problems registering please drop an email to email@example.com.
Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!
So DH and I are strict budgeters for the most part. Therefore, we are able to pay our bills, put money away, etc. To his family this means we are rich and are available to give money out to them that they will "pay back." Which means we will never see it again. Before DH and I were married he gave them money all the time (when I say "they" I mean his 6 brothers and sisters) but when we got married they stopped asking for awhile. Recently however, they have started asking again. DH always asks me what I think and we talk it over and we have told some of them no however, we lent two of them money (not a substantial amount, but enough). They promised to pay us back, we haven't seen it since, and we probably aren't going to. I'm so over lending money already. How can we communicate with them that we are not going to lend money anymore without making them think we are Scrooges? Thanks ladies!
You eventually have to make it clear that you are acting as a "bank" and as such, you may have to require promissory notes be signed. And don't be afraid to use it if you have to.
Sorry I can't give better advice. I lent lots of money (600 bucks) to a "friend," who was supposed to pay it back, and she never paid a penny... it kind of makes me gun shy to ever take that leap again... I just won't do it... you may have to get to that point, regardless of what they think of it!
I see that you're TTC. That's the perfect "reason" for a change in policy about lending money to family--even if it's not the actual reason. Tell everyone that the focus has now shifted to your future children and life as your own family. Your first priority is to to that, not the extended family. If they want to argue with that reasoning, then they're being unreasonable. Aren't they puttimg their own families first by not paying back your money?