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I hope someone can help with this. I have a 10 year old male cat, Baby. He lived with another older cat, Cicko, for 9 years of his life in Canada. Then I moved to the States and 6 months before the move I brought him here, and he stayed with my fiance while I was back in Canada finishing up my work. Then 6 months later I moved here and brought Cicko with me. Baby didn't seem to like that, it was like he was used to being an only cat in the house. There wasn't any big problems, but Baby would chase Cicko down or swat at him, nothing too major. Couple of weeks after we got here, Cicko passed away So Baby was once again the only cat, so my DH and I decided to get another kitty. We adopted this beautiful female cat, Lola, 5 days ago. She's the sweetest girl and we decided on a female cat because I've read that it's better to bring a female cat into the home of a male cat. Now, Baby is showing signs of anger and resentment I guess. Before these changes, he would howl sometimes at night, mostly around 5 or 6 am, but all we had to do is say something and he would be ok. Or he would come up on our bed in the early morning and sleep on my pillow. Ever since we got Lola, he doesn't even want to come close to the bed, because she's been on it. He howls most of the night, the sounds that come out of his mouth make the hairs on the back of my neck stand. Now he does it during the day too, he'll just walk around the house howling. And nothing we do helps. We give him even more attention, we pick him up when he starts howling, but it doesn't help. The day after Lola came, he peed on a bunch of newspaper we had on the floor. He's never peed on anything else before, he's always used his litter box. Yesterday we got the microfiber furniture and this morning there is a big pee stain on our new sofa. I feel so bad for him, because he's my baby, I love him to pieces. I don't know how to help him. He doesn't seem to be aggressive towards Lola, sometimes they chase each other around the house, playfully. They seem fine with each other. But he's obviously not fine. I'm wondering if any of you had the same experience and if his behaviour will change as time goes by? Any help would be appreciated. SOrry for the long post
IMO you need to stop giving him attention when he does it or he'll learn his behavior equals attention from you and it'll never stop. Just let him be for awhile, ignore the behavior and let him adjust. You probably shouldn't have adopted a new cat if he was acting that way with the other one but what's done is done. Is Lola spayed? And is baby neutered? If the answer is no to either one I'd recommend you do both which may help. If they already are then just let them be they'll sort it out on their own. He's had a MAJOR upset in his life (which cats do not adapt well) with moving, another major upset with a cat moving in, another major upset with the cat dying and leaving, then another major upset with another strange cat moving in. Sounds like he is stressed to the max but then coddling him when he misbehaves just reinforces the bad behavior. It's only been 5 days, cats can take a month or two to "lighten up" so just ignore him and his behavior. If he wants atetntion he'll come to you and you can give it to him on HIS terms.
Good luck and hope he comes around sooner rather than later.
Thank you for your response. Yes, both cats are neutered/spayed. I was expecting that there would be some spats, and that it wouldn't be easy, and that it would take some time. I just wanted some reassurance that he will adjust. I don't mind the sleepless nights when he's howling, I just want him to not be upset. But as you say, he'll adjust, we just have to give him time. And probably protect the furniture somehow
You may want to confine them both to one room until he settles down. It'll cut down on the urine, 'cause I speak from experience, it's almost impossible to get the smell out, especially if it's a long term continued behavior.