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Talk of TTC/NTNP...here's an idea.


Forum: Waiting to Try to Conceive

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View Poll Results: Sub Forum for Baby Fever/Oops/Casual TTC Talk?
Yes 2 12.50%
No 14 87.50%
Voters: 16. You may not vote on this poll

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  #21  
March 30th, 2011, 03:48 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Phoenix, Az
Posts: 3,622
Quote:
Originally Posted by mrs.klynn View Post
Being someone that IS wttc, and did just have a cycle where I thought an oopsie was possible, I apologize if sharing that was hard for anyone to read. I certainly don't think it's appropriate to imply that someone maybe made their oops happen.

I personally don't think that there is anything wrong with people sharing such things, I mean if it happens cycle after cycle after cycle then clearly they really aren't wttc, but for me personally I'm not about to go over to the Am I pregnant forum where I know no one, have never posted, and possibly wouldn't get the support I was looking for. I shared it here because this is the forum that I'm on, and feel comfortable talking with the girls here who have been around for a while.

Personally I voted no to the sub-forum idea.

Doesn't matter what forum you are on, someone is always gonna say something somewhere that others don't agree with. While WTTC is meant for us that are waiting, I don't think it's out of line to see posts on here in regards to ttc, the 2ww, or an oops.

When the time comes that we actually do start ttc, I'll be sure to make the switch to another forum, but until then I hope that we can all be supportive of one another.


Quote:
I wish you would, Your DD is just too cute to not be seen as much as possible. LOL I love that pic!
Aw thanks! I really am trying, because everyone here is so sweet and supportive. I DO read everyday, I just don't always have time to respond. DD has been very rambunctious lately and skipping her naps so I can't really get on until she is down for the night. She had to get up early today, so is actually napping right now.
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  #22  
March 30th, 2011, 06:23 PM
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Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 2,713
As others have stated, I sometimes forget to check the sub-forums. Personally, it does not bother me to read about others TTC or NTNP. When I read about others trying or NTNP or even hoping for an oopsie - I just say, YEAH! that will be me soon.

I also like the idea of the parentheses so that everyone can choose to read it or not.

JMHO...
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  #23  
March 30th, 2011, 06:45 PM
Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: London England
Posts: 553
Quote:
Originally Posted by LadyGamer View Post
I am one of the people that complained. It makes it really hard for those of us who are actually WTTC. I don't think it is realistic to seperate all the stuff, but it is VERY VERY difficult with all the people who are talking about the 2WW and not realy waiting and oopsies. I don't mind people talking about wanting or when or babies, but I think people should realize what they are posting and that some of us are ACTUALLY WAITING and suffering through the wait and this isn't a game.
I am sorry that you have been hurt by some of the posts. I can understand and appreciate where you are coming from. Some things that don't bother me, may and clearly do still hurt and upset others.

So can I ask - Would labeling the threads like we have suggested help, so that you are not looking into those threads? or are just seeing the thread titles themselves just as upsetting?

I think it is important to know that.

Last edited by second_chance_mum; March 30th, 2011 at 06:47 PM.
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  #24  
March 31st, 2011, 12:06 AM
Two for More's Avatar Veteran
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 121
I voted no on the sub-forum idea yesterday, mainly because I am in the habit of skipping over the subforums, and would likely forget that an 2ww/Oopsies subforum was there.

I don't mind the genuine oops thread, as I've talked about how I've felt during a cycle where I thought I may have been pregnant, and that is something that I'm likely to talk about here if it happens again. I like the idea of using "TTC mentioned" in the title of a post like that, and I'll try to remember to do that if I feel the need to post something like that in the future.

I think one thing going on here is that as people get closer to each other, it becomes harder to imagine leaving this board for another board, including the Grads board, because we haven't developed a bond with others on those boards. I lurk in other boards around JM, but I honestly forget about the Grads board because I think only one person has graduated since I started posting here (hi, Urchin :-) and I'm still a few months away from trying.

I do think that we all have a responsibility to know when it is time to move on, though. Once I'm officially no longer waiting to try (estimated July 1!), I do plan to move on. If others plan to move on to the Grads board, there is where I will go, because I do like the group that we have here, and I'm interested in following along with everyone's journey. Otherwise, I'll move on to a TTC board and start establishing new relationships there.

Has anyone else thought about where they'll go once they are officially NTNP or TTC? Will you move on to the Grad board or a different TTC board? I think I've been assuming everyone will move on to the Grads board, but maybe no one wants to because they don't know anyone there?
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  #25  
March 31st, 2011, 03:42 AM
JesSsica's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: northern Indiana
Posts: 1,233
The trickiest thing about JM is that each board has rules. The hard part is that just when you get comfortable posting with a group of people your life's status changes and then the board you post on needs to also-- at least for me (TTC to DDC to loss to TTC after loss, to waiting, etc etc etc). I can never get fully comfortable with anyone because just when I start really getting to know the "faces" on a board, my life situation changes and I am gently told to move on to a place where I belong.
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  #26  
March 31st, 2011, 05:09 AM
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: London England
Posts: 553
I don't know where I will go after. There is no board for those TTC after a TR. There is infertility but I don't really fit there. There is older mothers but having had a TR will play a big role in my TTC. With the high rate of miscarriage, I don't know if I will go to the TTC after loss, because I don't know if it is something I want to focus on in that way.

I know when I finally do get pregnant I will do to the DDC forums, but for the TTC stage, I have no idea. I would love to go to the Grad section, but if no one is there, then what can you do?
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  #27  
March 31st, 2011, 06:09 AM
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I feel really bad because I am one of the people who talked about being in the TWW. I saw these threads about it and didn't even know what to say, so I haven't been posting here the past couple of days. I definately didn't mean to offend anyone, though.

I will do whatever most are comfortable with here. I am new to this board, but I really enjoy being here. When I did join...we were WTTC, now we go back and forth about it, so I still kind of consider us waiting. All of you ladies are great, though, and I love reading about what everyone else is going through, and having friends that understand. ♥
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  #28  
March 31st, 2011, 08:06 AM
(not so patiently) WTTC
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Southern CA
Posts: 2,203
I think when we move on to TTC i will move to the Grads, but post on the AIP board. It's a little bit of everything over there. I will also lurk the WTTC board, of course!
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  #29  
March 31st, 2011, 08:57 AM
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Midwest
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *BirdWifey* View Post
I feel really bad because I am one of the people who talked about being in the TWW. I saw these threads about it and didn't even know what to say, so I haven't been posting here the past couple of days. I definately didn't mean to offend anyone, though.

I will do whatever most are comfortable with here. I am new to this board, but I really enjoy being here. When I did join...we were WTTC, now we go back and forth about it, so I still kind of consider us waiting. All of you ladies are great, though, and I love reading about what everyone else is going through, and having friends that understand. ♥

Don't feel bad or quit posting here!!!!! Being in the 2ww is not a bad thing around here
But I think we could do the parenthesis thing and that should be good. But I am not someone who is offended or hurt by anything here, that could be because I am happy with wttc hahaha..... anyways, those who were hurt/etc. would the parenthesis be a good solution, or do you have any suggestions?
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  #30  
March 31st, 2011, 10:36 AM
Spero's Avatar Nice to meet you, I'm Kat
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 837
I too am really very sorry if I offended anyone by posting in the 2ww thread. I am really and truly WTTC (in 4 years we've never dtd during a time that I knew I was fertile), but since we don't use birth control, just charting...I'm always paranoid that I'm pregnant around AF time. I'll try to keep the paranoia to myself or post about it on the charting or nfp threads. It's tough enough to have a long wait before TTC, so I would definitely not want to do anything to make that wait worse for anyone!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Two for More View Post
Has anyone else thought about where they'll go once they are officially NTNP or TTC? Will you move on to the Grad board or a different TTC board? I think I've been assuming everyone will move on to the Grads board, but maybe no one wants to because they don't know anyone there?
I was thinking about that yesterday. I'll probably try out our Grads board and remain there through TTC, pregnancy and after. I think you and I will be TTC around the same time so we could go test it out together! TTC and TTC #1 sound good too. I'd love to belong to more than one to pass the time!!
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Last edited by Spero; March 31st, 2011 at 11:45 AM.
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  #31  
March 31st, 2011, 01:53 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 320
i enjoy being apart of this forum and enjoy reading about what people have to say. and obviously people are going to start TTC before others and we need to support them in their journey. i want to hear all about the 'yays' and the 'not this month' and then follow the stories in the grads section. we are all in this forum waiting patiently and to support each other no matter what the post is about. if someone gets pregnant surprise or not we should be happy for them.
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  #32  
March 31st, 2011, 05:08 PM
MissusF's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Central CA
Posts: 3,368
Quote:
Originally Posted by Two for More View Post
Has anyone else thought about where they'll go once they are officially NTNP or TTC? Will you move on to the Grad board or a different TTC board? I think I've been assuming everyone will move on to the Grads board, but maybe no one wants to because they don't know anyone there?

Funny you should ask this, I've technically graduated from WTTC (we've been kinda/sorta trying since last month). I tried some of the TTC forums and didn't like it there. We're trying to keep TTC really casual and stress free and posting on those boards wasn't helping that! I like this board since there is a lot of general conversation topics and not endless pee stick analysis threads and so on. Then again I don't really talk much about my TTC status or care about agonizing over possible symptoms, 2ww, etc. I might try the grads section, but it's kinda like a ghost town in there lol.
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  #33  
March 31st, 2011, 06:52 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Canada
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MissusF View Post
I might try the grads section, but it's kinda like a ghost town in there lol.

Ghost town in there is right. It used to be full of the ladies that had become close while in the wttc, and then moved onto wttc grads but now it's like there's no one around there hardly at all.
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  #34  
March 31st, 2011, 07:46 PM
LadyGamer's Avatar Objection!!!
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Toronto, ON
Posts: 12,478
The Grads are still there, as you can tell when someone actually posts, but people are really too busy to think up and start topics.
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  #35  
March 31st, 2011, 09:43 PM
taatie10's Avatar New Mommy & Pro Auntee
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Northern AZ
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *BirdWifey* View Post
I feel really bad because I am one of the people who talked about being in the TWW. I saw these threads about it and didn't even know what to say, so I haven't been posting here the past couple of days. I definately didn't mean to offend anyone, though.

I will do whatever most are comfortable with here. I am new to this board, but I really enjoy being here. When I did join...we were WTTC, now we go back and forth about it, so I still kind of consider us waiting. All of you ladies are great, though, and I love reading about what everyone else is going through, and having friends that understand. ♥
Dont feel too bad I have done it as well. I didnt want to go to the I Am Pregnant board because its depressing to me because they are all actively, I mean really actively TTC and I was not so I felt so out of place.
If this is seriously going to be a problem I might end up not coming anymore. It takes a lot to become comfortable with people to talk freely and that is just what I've needed the past few months.
If one of us thinks we are in the 2WW but arent TTC am I ridiculous to talk about it here?

Lady Gamer- I hate to sound like a B**** but I really dont appreciate someone making it sound horrible for one of us to talk about 2ww or an oopsie on a WTTC because it so difficult for some who are waiting. I of all people know how difficult waiting is. Its eating me alive. I have waited nearing 3 years after a devastating loss. So I really dont appreciate that.

I apologize for what I just said if I offended anyone but I think it needed to be said and I've tried to hold off saying things but this just did it.
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  #36  
March 31st, 2011, 10:12 PM
(not so patiently) WTTC
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Southern CA
Posts: 2,203
Katie, it seems as the majority feel that talking about TTC oopsies are not a big deal, and also that most of us feel that the () or {} in the title post would be the best solution. The sub forums are dead. It's easy to see.

I hope that you really don't go! NO ONE should feel bad about the previous posts! We should support one another, not make eachother feel bad. That's the best thing about this board..I know it's only been a few weeks but I really enjoy coming on here and seeing how everyone is in ALL aspects of their lives. Just look at that thread that we all made a deal to still keep in touch even after out WTTC status changes.

We need to respect eachother's feelings...from BOTH sides.

LadyGamer, what do you think of the compromise we came up with?
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  #37  
March 31st, 2011, 10:20 PM
taatie10's Avatar New Mommy & Pro Auntee
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AshleyNR View Post
Katie, it seems as the majority feel that talking about TTC oopsies are not a big deal, and also that most of us feel that the () or {} in the title post would be the best solution. The sub forums are dead. It's easy to see.

I hope that you really don't go! NO ONE should feel bad about the previous posts! We should support one another, not make eachother feel bad. That's the best thing about this board..I know it's only been a few weeks but I really enjoy coming on here and seeing how everyone is in ALL aspects of their lives. Just look at that thread that we all made a deal to still keep in touch even after out WTTC status changes.
Sorry I just snapped. Obviously that hit me like a freight train of hurt and I snapped. Last thing any of us need is to feel hurt when we are here for support.
I can see both sides but doesnt change emotions.

I really dont think I'll go anywhere. I dont have anywhere to go. So far this is the only place I feel half sane since I cant really talk about this stuff with anyone in my life.
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  #38  
March 31st, 2011, 10:53 PM
MomTo3LittleBoys's Avatar Love my house of boys!
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Location: United States
Posts: 3,745
Nobody should feel bad! I am the co-host and I have talked about oopsies LOL woops. We feel comfortable enough with each other to be able to. So from now on, everyone just put (TTC,oopsies etc ) in there titles.
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  #39  
April 1st, 2011, 06:26 AM
Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by taatie10 View Post
Dont feel too bad I have done it as well. I didnt want to go to the I Am Pregnant board because its depressing to me because they are all actively, I mean really actively TTC and I was not so I felt so out of place.
If this is seriously going to be a problem I might end up not coming anymore. It takes a lot to become comfortable with people to talk freely and that is just what I've needed the past few months.
If one of us thinks we are in the 2WW but arent TTC am I ridiculous to talk about it here?

Lady Gamer- I hate to sound like a B**** but I really dont appreciate someone making it sound horrible for one of us to talk about 2ww or an oopsie on a WTTC because it so difficult for some who are waiting. I of all people know how difficult waiting is. Its eating me alive. I have waited nearing 3 years after a devastating loss. So I really dont appreciate that.

I apologize for what I just said if I offended anyone but I think it needed to be said and I've tried to hold off saying things but this just did it.
Please don't let this stop you from coming here and being part of this community we have. I've seen it happen in the past in this exact board where peoples feelings get hurt, or someone got called out for sharing news of joy that was hard for others to hear. In my mind while it might be hard to hear some things we should all still be happy for one another.

It's like one person only having a 2 month wait while another has a 3 year wait....should the person having only a 2 month wait not be allowed to express joy and excitement that their time is coming near because it might be hard for the person having to wait 3 years. Personally I don't think so!

I've been around this board for a LONG time, and I've seen a lot of people come and move on, and I've seen some rifts that have separated some, or caused others to feel like they don't belong, or can't share their ups and downs with others. That is NOT what this place is about, this IS a place that we should all be welcomed to come, to share, to support.

I can understand why you are upset, I was too. I know for me I was caught off guard by all of this, because I didn't realize we had people on the board that had such feelings. I was furthermore upset about the attitude of one implying that some of us don't take WTTC seriously, or that we don't know the heartache that comes along with having to wait.

Hope this can continue to be a place where people old and new will come to share their waiting time with another and that everyone can still feel like it's a place where they can openly share with one another. I'd hate to see this place become a ghost town like it was for quite a while.
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