Family Drama Vent

purlyrocker · #1 January 21st, 2012, 11:37 AM

So, this basically totally off topic, but I wanted to vent and picked here.

So my cousin...second cousin I think (our grandmothers are sisters), anyways she's pregnant. And 15. Right, so look, some drama already. So her side of the family is pretty, well, judgemental holier then though jerks...and that's being nice. Its my dad's side of the family, and when my dad got my mom pregnant, they flipped the freak out, he was 16 at the time. And well, my yay girl ways have never won me any praise over there either. Getting the picture? Good. So her parents tossed her out. Now, she's a good kid. Good grades, volunteers, just an over all good kid, the kind of teenager you'd actually want around. But she made a mistake. It happens, we all make them. But her parents won't hear of it and tossed her out. And the only family that will take her in is one cousin who is living in a one bedroom apartment with her husband and kid, so not much room for a pregnant teen. It's not a permanent solution, just a temporary one. And her school, well...she everyone found out and no one is on team her. She's talked about dropping out.

Anyways, we've kind of been waiting to see if her parents will get over their freak out and let her back in her house. Nope, they aren't budging. She's gonna burn and they're gonna punish her til she does. They unfriended her on facebook. I know it sounds stupid, but come on, it's your kid! She got knocked up, she's not keeping people chained in the basement as pets.

DW and I have disscussed it over and over again. And we decided if she wants to, she can come live with us. She hasen't decided what exactly she's going do (she dosen't want to have an abortion), but we'll support her in any way we can. She's leaning towards an adoption. I called her parents this morning and told them we want to take her in. They said some rather rude things, then asked what kind of paperwork we needed them to sign, we have a meeting with our lawyer on Monday so we can be her gurdians. I'm waiting for her to get on her computer so I can talk to her about it. They took her cell phone but she has her laptop. I'll keep you all posted.

2Corinthians10:4 · #2 January 21st, 2012, 12:05 PM

That's horrible that they are treating her that way. My heart breaks for her. I got pregnant at 18 and it was hard, I can't imagine doing it at 15-but the point is she can do it, if she wants to and has the proper support behind her.

I just want to hug you through the screen for being willing to be the support she needs. She has a hard road ahead of her no matter what choice she makes, and I hope she appreciates your support and realizes how wrong her parents are in all of this.

plan4fate · #3 January 21st, 2012, 01:18 PM

How horrid. Absolutely horrid.

Good for you and your DW for wanting to take her in. I love when there are nice people in the world still.

Irish_Wristwatch · #4 January 21st, 2012, 01:43 PM

thats so sad

that poor girl is already going through enough without her family treating her like crap! Shes so lucky to have you and DW

purlyrocker · #5 January 21st, 2012, 03:03 PM

So, update, she's gonna come live with us! She finally got on line after she spent her saturday morning pass out food to the homeless and then volunteering at the library with kids who have reading difficulites, and then watched her cousin's kid so she could go out for a bit, gah, I can't get over how sweet and helpful she is! Anyways, I offered for her to come live with us for as long as she likes (we've got plenty of room), and she jumped at it.

I also called and got her sister on the phone who told me she's been packing up stuff and will start sending some of if to us. Her parents made me swear we don't want money from them, we don't want anything other then a few signantures from them, and told me "good luck with that kind of girl".

I cannot understand how someone could just get rid of their child like that. For not being exactly way they think they want their child. I can't wait for her to get here and know what it is to be accepted even if you make mistakes.

PurpleStar · #6 January 21st, 2012, 04:19 PM

OMG! That is just crazy!!! I have no idea how parents can just toss a child away like that! Is there a love on/off button I don't know about?!!! Even if Vaughn had a tribulation like this, I could never EVER imagine just removing Vaughn from my life. EVER!!!

Holy Rollers!!! Grrr...I could seriously go off on a crazy tangent right now!

You and Molly are doing a wonderful thing and I really hope your cousin understands how lucky she is that you both have open such hearts and arms =)

KUP on how the transition goes!

Megan30 · #7 January 21st, 2012, 07:19 PM

I'll never understand people...never...but luckily I'll never stop being amazed by people like you and your DW. Thank you for being such a good role model not only for your cousin but for girls in general.

Memi · #8 January 21st, 2012, 08:53 PM

Wow! I'm so sad for her to not have more unconditional love shown to her as she should have from her parents. She's so lucky to have you in her life though. Good for you and DW to show her a loving place to stay. That warms my heart! Hopefully you guys can be a safe place and help her make some very big decisions and support her in the next few difficult months she has ahead of her

Shades of Grey · #9 January 22nd, 2012, 07:31 AM

Ugh this makes me sick. I dont understand how anyone could do that to their child. Especially when she is obviously in need of support and guidance in what may be one of the hardest times of her life. THat had to hurt her so much. Im so glad she has you and Molly. I bet it will be a great help for her to deal with the decisions she'll be facing with your support.

cocosmumNco · #10 January 22nd, 2012, 03:32 PM

thats horriable no parent should ever give up on their child shes better off without them. good for you taking her in shes so lucky to have you both. sounds like she will be just fine.