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Forum: Waiting to Try to Conceive

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  • 1 Post By Irish_Wristwatch
  • 1 Post By HippieLove
  • 1 Post By BriarRose

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  #1  
August 30th, 2013, 08:46 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 1,415
Went intona crying jag last night again because I am tired of having to wait. It was helped along by finding out that yet again as a military wife with no kids I have been excluded from yet another gathering...which is a CHILDLESS gathering. Leave the kids at home and come get a drink. But since I do not have kids yet I do not get invited because I have all this supposed free time to party and drink apparently and do not need to get invited.

I guess having a different determination on when it is best to start a family makes me a freak. Trust me, I don't want to be practical! I want to be a mommy! But that is not a smart move for us right now
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  #2  
August 30th, 2013, 09:26 AM
Irish_Wristwatch's Avatar Running with Scissors....
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 16,275
im sorry you were left out are you close with the group of women who planned the gathering? maybe you can mention to someone that next time you would love to join them... they might not know you wanted to come
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  #3  
August 30th, 2013, 09:34 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Irish_Wristwatch View Post
im sorry you were left out are you close with the group of women who planned the gathering? maybe you can mention to someone that next time you would love to join them... they might not know you wanted to come
I have. I get the "you do not have kids so you do not understand us" bs. No one is really that close to each other. I have seen two women dislike each other until the childless one gets pregnant and then everyone is buddy buddy. And this is not the first unit this has happened either It has nothing to do with people being close, the only common denomintator is that they all have kids.
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  #4  
August 30th, 2013, 10:34 AM
Irish_Wristwatch's Avatar Running with Scissors....
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 16,275
thats lame! Honestly i probably wouldnt invite my childfree friends to a moms night out, just because id assume they didnt want to come, if one of them said they would id totally let them join in.

It sounds very highschool to exclude you like that!

are their other military wives without children? have a get together with them and leave all those moms out
THE angry uterus likes this.
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  #5  
August 30th, 2013, 05:52 PM
HippieLove's Avatar Modern Day Brady Bunch
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Location: Down Under
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Wow I'm really sorry that they are like that. Honestly, if I were you and even if I had kids, I don't know if I'd want to befriend a group of people like that anyway.



I'm so sorry that waiting is difficult for you, I wish this year would hurry up and just fly and then next year, so it can be my turn. I understand the ache (although I do have children so it would be easier for me to wait I assume).
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  #6  
August 30th, 2013, 08:15 PM
ashj_1218's Avatar Hiya!
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 11,595
That totally sucks!!

I have tons of childless friends (most of my "classmates" are childless still) and we do stuff together, even if several of my friends with kids are coming. I don't understand why folks think it's so "different." Heck, sometimes I like my kidless friends better...they don't want to discuss childbirth and poop. Lol. If I wanna get out without the kids, I wanna stop thinking about said things.

I hate that they did that to you. Making a responsible choice should never exclude you from events. I can see how isolating that would be for you. I certainly wouldn't want to befriend them after becoming pregnant either, sounds like they are on their high horse and would only serve as a source of stress for a new mom. But I am sorry they excluded you.

I admire you, frankly. My first was a total shocker (BC pill baby) and we were not in the best place for him to join us. I don't regret it at all. But being prepared is something I wish we had the benefit of. It affected a lot of things for us, both during his pregnancy and after his birth. I might have enjoyed him a little more if I wasn't so overwhelmed with my unexpected life change (I also moved, graduated, and got married the four months before he arrived).
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  #7  
August 31st, 2013, 07:09 PM
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Thanks ladies. It just ticks me off to have a mandate like that. What happens to those ladies who have been TTC for a while and need lots of support, but since they don't have kids yet they don't get counted?

DH is trying to make me feel better by asking if there is any way we could move up TTC and still make sure I do not having to transfer too pregnant. I love him so much, he is so supportive.
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  #8  
September 1st, 2013, 08:15 PM
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Join Date: May 2008
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OMG. That IS so lame!! I'm sorry, but I agree, doesn't sound like you want to be friends with these types of women anyway!!
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  #9  
September 1st, 2013, 08:59 PM
HippieLove's Avatar Modern Day Brady Bunch
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Your Dh sounds wonderful
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Emma, girlfriend of Loz, future step-mama to J (15) and K (10), Mama to Jaelah (8), Oliver (6), Mianna (4) and Harper (2),

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  #10  
September 3rd, 2013, 06:38 AM
Urchin's Avatar Loving every minute.
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Location: Atlantic Canada
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Yikes, I wouldn't want to hang around with these people at all. It sucks feeling excluded, but I can just imagine how awful those girls would be to be friends with. Not worth it!
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